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Christmas Cookies (Summers Style)

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Buffy Summers has seen a lot of funny things in her time. Since the new slayers were created last year, she thinks she might have laughed more than in her entire life up to that point. Turns out, when she’s not overwhelmed with apocalypses and demons, her life can be a hell of a lot more fun. The new slayers have a penchant for jokes and pranks, and once Buffy kicked a couple of asses on the training mats, they decided to take their buckets of water and fake texts elsewhere.

There’s been a lot of funny moments: Giles apparently has a spider phobia (Amanda’s pet tarantula), Willow looks ridiculous with purple hair (Andrew, amazingly… good thing that was only kool-aid), and Willow’s retaliation on him… well, let’s just say Buffy didn’t know he could turn that shade of red. Who knew her once-shy little Will would hire two strippers just to get back at someone?

The latest of these funny events though, is one of the funniest so far. Faith is making cookies.

“B, what the fuck is the difference between tsp and tbsp?! I know a shitload of short forms, from WTF to BOB to BDSM but this book is like Giles’s demon encyclopedia!”

Faith, who lost a bet with Buffy yesterday, is wearing an apron. Yes, it says “Sexy Bitch” on it, but still. An apron. She has flour on her nose, which she hasn’t realised and Buffy is so not telling her about. With luck maybe Willow or Kennedy will stop by and brave certain death to take a photo and put it on Instagram.

The cookie making thing was a tradition of Joyce Summers. She and Buffy used to make them every year. When she got old enough to read a recipe, her mom would set her up at one end of the table and let her make one batch, usually sugar cookies, and her mother would make the others, usually chocolate chip. Then they’d let Dawn help decorate them.

Dawn is still in Cleveland. She won’t be here until Christmas eve sometime, still a week away. She claims it’s because she’s a watcher, she has responsibilities, blah blah blah. Because it has nothing at all to do with her new boyfriend, Jeff. Right.

Buffy didn’t want to make cookies alone. So she made a bet with Faith (an almost daily occurrence once they started living in the same apartment six months ago). She loses as many of their bets as she wins, but then, Faith has rather simple desires. Mostly her winning involves Buffy going drinking and dancing, which she secretly loves anyway. But Faith lost the bet, so… cookies.

“Here,” Buffy says, handing over the set of measuring spoons. She points out the differences between teaspoon and tablespoon. Her own chocolate chip cookie dough is almost finished. “BOB?” she asks, curious.

“Battery operated boyfriend.” Faith grins at the way Buffy wrinkles her nose.

Buffy turns up the radio on her way by, because that new song she likes is on, then goes to pre-heat the oven.

When she gets back to the table, Faith looks confused. “What?” Buffy asks, hoping to God she didn’t screw up the recipe.

Faith looks at her. “It says to roll the dough into two balls and then chill for half an hour. Why is your cook book telling me to have a beer?” She shrugs, okay with the command and grabs a beer out of the fridge, and Buffy starts giggling. Trust Faith.

“It means the dough, Faith. And get me one of those while you’re at it.”

Faith does so, putting the dough away at the same time, then sits down and watches Buffy dish out cookie dough onto sheets for the oven. She’s rather quiet, but this isn’t necessarily unusual for her. It might’ve been the hardest thing for Buffy to get used to in this new Faith, how calm she can be. About half a beer later she says “I’ve never made cookies before.”

Buffy tries not to show the pity this makes her feel. She knows Faith won’t appreciate it. But it’s hard. She thinks all kids should know how it feels to bake cookies with their friends or family for a holiday, whether it’s Christmas or Hanukkah or Kwanzaa. So she just smiles and says “Well, you have now. And being part of an official Joyce Summers tradition, you’re now honour bound to help each year.”

Faith smiles, one of those real ones that makes Buffy’s heart do funny things that are absolutely, positively just because Faith is her friend. Really. That’s all it is. Friendly.

“Do I gotta take an oath or some shit? Like, the Summers clan code of cookie ethics?” Faith’s smile is evolving into a grin, and Buffy decides she likes that smile too (What? Friends, really) and grabs up the cook book.

She holds out the book and waits while Faith places one hand on her heart and the other on the book, fingertips brushing Buffy’s and activating slayer tingles. “Do you, Faith…” She trails off for a sec, confused, and then says “uh… Oh my God. I’m a terrible friend. What the hell is your last name?”

Faith laughs slightly. “Finally asked, huh? Lehane, B. My last name is Lehane.”

“Oh.” Buffy shakes herself and regains the regal bearing and tone. “Do you, Faith Lehane, swear to abide by the Summers code of cookie baking, to bake cookies whenever the holidays come no matter how pissy people get at each other, for every holiday you can from here to kingdom come, so help you…” she peers at the book “Easy Cookie Recipes For Dummies?” she finishes, trying not to giggle.

Faith is laughing outright, but does say “I, Faith Lehane, so swear,” before collapsing into her own chair.

It’s an oath Buffy will see again six years later, watching her wife administer it to their now four year old daughter. But that’s another story.

(Oh, and Faith killed a roll of wrapping paper chasing Buffy for that picture on Instagram.)

The End