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To Facts My Fantasies

Summary:

Revali doesn't believe in love, but Link makes him want to.

The only problem is that Link is entirely in love with someone else.

(aka the cyrano de bergerac inspired revalink fic in which link is a clueless boy who asks revali, who has a crush on him, to help him ask sidon, who is also clueless, out)

Notes:

title is from Cyrano de Bergerac by Edmond Rostand-- "Take it, and turn to facts my fantasies"

you thought i might wait perhaps a day before starting another fic? ridiculous. you don't GET a break from me >:)

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1

Notes:

cw: food

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Revali doesn’t believe in love.

Why would he? It’s not like he’s ever had an example of it in his own life. His parents got divorced when he was six, and he can still remember them fighting, how much they hated each other near the end, how much they hate each other now. He was passed between parents, neither of whom were really equipped to do anything even resembling parenting, until they decided to pass him off on his grandfather, apparently because he was a ‘trouble child’. He was eight.

If he’s ever seen love at all, it was from his grandfather, who taught him how to bake. He taught him to put all the sadness, all the loneliness, all the bad things and to make them into something beautiful and delicious that made other people happy. He taught him that life wasn’t all bad, that it had bad things and sometimes more of that than the good, but that there were bright moments in the darkness, and that when those ran out, you could always make some cookies and it’d at least get you through.

A year ago, his grandpa had died, and with him all the love Revali had ever felt. So no, he doesn’t believe in love. He believes in hard work, and he believes in well-decorated cakes and the delighted smiles of kids when they taste his famous chocolate chip cookies, and he believes in himself, but he doesn’t believe in love.

It’s a slow day at the RV Bakery, and Revali is working back in the kitchen on a batch of brownies. His coworker, Leuco, a college student with dyed striped black and white hair, peeks back into the kitchen and says, “Hey, Revali, you know ASL, right?”

“Yeah, why?” Revali asks, taking his eyes away from his batter for a moment.

“There’s a customer in here signing something and I have no idea what he’s trying to tell me.”

Revali looks back to his batter. “I don’t do register.”

“You do if you don’t want me to tell the boss you’re the reason we turned a paying customer away.”

Revali scowls. “You suck. Fine.”

He walks out to the front of the bakery. The customer is a short guy with blonde hair and the bluest eyes Revali has ever seen, and Revali thinks, I don’t believe in love, but I might if you asked me to.

“Hello,” Revali signs hesitantly. He hasn’t taken a class in a while. “What can I get for you?”

“Oh, good!” the customer signs back, beaming. “I’ve had the longest day, and I was beginning to worry that I wouldn’t be able to get coffee anywhere.”

Oh. Coffee. Revali makes a face.

“Do you not like it?” the customer inquires. “Oh, by the way, I’m hearing, so you can speak if that’s easier for you.”

Oh, thank goodness. He should really go back to his language studies. “Thanks. And I prefer tea, but if you like crappy bean water, knock yourself out,” Revali says dismissively.

The customer laughs, surprised. “I guess I could expand my horizons a bit. Your favorite tea, how about, and maybe a chocolate chip cookie?”

Revali brightens slightly. “Those are my favorite.”

“Mine too,” the customer signs confidentially.

“I will revise my opinion of you accordingly.”

He laughs again. “I’m so glad.”

Revali brews the tea (caramel cinnamon; unsurprisingly, he has a sweet tooth) and bags a chocolate chip cookie. “Thanks for coming by.”

“Oh, I’ll be eating here,” the customer signs brightly, handing over some cash. “I don’t think I can go another step without some caffeine, honestly.”

“Oh. All right.”

Brownies forgotten, he pretends to be busy washing tables, but really he’s keeping an eye out to see if the customer likes the cookie.

He takes a bite, then his eyes widen, and he makes what seems like an involuntary noise. Revali preens secretly.

The customer turns to him and signs with an awestruck expression on his face, “This is amazing.”

“Thanks. They’re really good, right?”

“Yes. I want to marry whoever made this,” he declares.

Revali slowly turns red.

The customer pauses, then closes his eyes briefly. “You made these, didn’t you,” he signs.

“Yes.”

“Right. Of course. Well…my compliments.”

The customer finishes the rest of his snack in embarrassed silence, but Revali notices he spends a lot of time looking at the door hopefully.

“Waiting for someone?” he eventually signs.

“No!” the customer signs, too quickly for it to be true. “No, I just…like to look outside.”

They both look outside simultaneously. The bakery faces a Thai restaurant.

“Well…Revali,” the customer signs awkwardly, peering at Revali’s name tag, “Thanks for feeding me. Sorry about the marriage thing.”

“It was fine,” Revali says, and it really was. It was actually kind of adorable, really. “Mr., uh…?”

“Link is fine,” he signs with a smile. “Seeing as how that’s my name.”

“Right. Well, Link, have a good day. Hope to see you in here again sometime.”

“You probably will. I don’t think I could live the rest of my life without these cookies, now,” he signs, then waves goodbye.

Revali waves back, then goes back behind the counter, where Leuco is waiting with a smirk.

“I don’t do register,” he says in a high-pitched, mocking voice, “I don’t like people, I hate everyone.”

“Seriously, shut up,” Revali responds irritably. “I was doing my job, which is more than I can say for you.”

“You should be thanking me. Bet you he asks you out next time he comes.”

“Yeah, right.”

“He already proposed, so it’s not too far a stretch,” Leuco says reasonably.

Revali rolls his eyes. “I’m going back to my brownies. I think they need more sugar.”

You need more sugar,” Leuco sings. Revali shoots him a glare, but he continues. “Bet Link can give you some.”

“Do you ever not suck entirely?” Revali demands. “Go back to looking at memes on your phone or texting people about how much you hate your job or whatever it is you do all day.”

“I don’t hate my job, I hate you.”

“The feeling is mutual. Now go away.”

“Fine.”

But as Revali adds more sugar to the batter, he can’t deny that he’s hoping Link will come by again.

Notes:

in my grand tradition of silly rito names, leuco is from corythaixoides leucogaster, the white-bellied go-away-bird, which is the joke at the end

the RV in RV Bakery of course stands for Rito Village

Chapter 2

Notes:

cw: food

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

As it happens, he does come by again exactly a week later.

“Your boyfriend’s here,” Leuco says as he comes in the kitchen. “I still can’t understand him.”

Revali rolls his eyes. “Not my boyfriend, but I’ll take care of him. Let me know when the timer goes off or I’ll personally defenestrate you.”

“Is that the thing where you cut off someone’s junk?” Leuco asks. “‘Cause, dude.”

“No, it’s—ugh. Nevermind.”

He wipes his hands on his apron as he goes out to the front. “Hello again.”

“Hello,” Link signs, smiling. “Nice to see you again.”

“Same. What do you want today?”

“Another cookie, and milk this time.”

“A classic.” He bends down to get the cookie from the display case.

When he gets back up, Link is fidgeting as he hands over the money for the milk and cookie. “Also, maybe a favor?”

Revali pauses. “Like what kind of favor?” Link couldn’t seriously be asking him out, right?

“This is really awkward,” Link signs, biting his lip. Not that Revali is looking at his lips. Or, well, he is, but only as they stand in relation to his entire face, so it’s not at all the same thing.

“It is now,” Revali says, raising an eyebrow.

“Oh. Sorry. Well…okay, so…you see that guy over there?” Link jerks his shoulder towards a corner of the shop.

Revali looks. The man Link is pointing out has to fold over on himself to fit in the chair, he’s so tall, and he’s talking animatedly to a delicate-looking girl. “Yeah?”

“I sort of have a major crush on him, and I want to talk to him, but he doesn’t know ASL,” Link signs all in a rush. “So I was wondering if you could translate for me?”

Revali blinks, processing. “Uh.”

Fricking Leuco, getting his hopes up.

“I’m sorry, that was probably super weird of me to ask,” Link signs apologetically. “Just forget it—”

“No, I’ll do it, I guess,” Revali says, looking skyward and asking himself why he’s doing this. Probably because he’s got a bit of a crush too, if he’s being honest, and because he’s always been a terrible self-saboteur. “He looks like he’s with someone, though.”

“That’s his sister,” Link signs, then his eyes widen. “I swear I’m not a stalker. She’s in one of my classes and she talks about him a lot.”

College student, then. A couple of things click together—why Link’s here at the same time on the same day, why he was looking at the door last time. “So it’s not stalking to come to someone’s favorite bakery just to see them?”

Link winces, scratching his head.

“Whatever,” Revali says, perhaps a touch too coldly. “Let’s go.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah. What, are you not?”

“I am,” Link protests, then, “Okay, I’m ready.”

They walk over, and Revali says without preamble, “Hey. My…friend here has something he wants to say to you.”

They both blink up at him. The girl brightens. “Oh, hello! You’re…Link, right? You’re in my figure drawing class.”

Link nods, flushing.

“You might know my brother too, then. He’s modeled for us once or twice.”

Oh, for pete’s sake.

Link’s hands begin to fly, signing, “Yeah, I remember. I actually wanted to ask if you wanted to hang out sometime? You seem like a cool person, and I’d like to get to know you better.”

They both stare at him, confused, and Revali sighs and translates.

The girl puts her hand to her mouth to hide a smile.

The boy grins. “Sure, why not! I’ll give you my phone so you can put your number in, okay?”

Link’s hands have been clenched at his side, bunching in the fabric of his shirt, but he brightens at that. He nods excitedly.

“That means yes,” Revali drawls. They both laugh.

The boy hands his phone to Revali, who gives him an odd look before handing the phone to Link.

“Oh, right,” the boy says with a wink. “Will he be coming too?” He gestures to Revali. “To translate.”

“I just work here—” Revali begins, but behind him, Link hurriedly nods yes.

“Great! The more the merrier, I always say,” the boy says happily. “I’m Sidon, by the way, and this is my sister Mipha.”

“Right.” Revali forces a smile. “If you’ll pardon me for a moment?” He turns around and signs, “What the complete frick.”

Link, who had been silently inputting his phone number into Sidon’s phone, winces again. “My brain sort of goes fuzzy around him.”

“I’m not going to go on your date with you!”

“It’s not a date! Just friends hanging out.”

“How are you expecting to be with this guy if he can’t understand you anyway?” Revali demands.

“I’ll work something out! I’ll write to him if I have to. Please, just this once?”

Revali drags his hand over his face, then signs exasperatedly, “Fine. But you are the worst, and the record should show that I am the best ever at any and all things—”

“Thank you so much!” Link’s eyes are shining, and Revali is so totally screwed. They turn around, Link handing Sidon’s phone back to him.

“Great. I’ll text you sometime.”

Revali walks back to the counter, completely done with this entire day, and Link chases after him.

“You need my number too,” he signs breathlessly. “So I can tell you when we’re…hanging out.”

Revali huffs and gives it to him.

“Thank you so, so much. I’m sorry to ask this of you.”

“Please just leave,” Revali says, irritated. “You’re holding up the line.”

Link's face falls. “Oh. Right. Well…see you later.”

He heads back into the kitchen, but on the way, Leuco accosts him, wiggling his eyebrows.

“I assure you,” Revali says dully, “That whatever you think just happened is not at all the thing that just happened.”

“Sure, sure.” Leuco hums the Wedding March, obnoxiously and off-key.

And the worst part is, Leuco didn’t tell him the timer went off, so the cakes he had in the oven are burnt.

Well, no. The whole thing with Link is definitely the worst part. But the cake thing sucks too.

Notes:

revali is turning out to be more of a grump than a jerk in this fic but i will try to fix that in the upcoming chapters

also lol i had totally forgotten to give this a summary at first. WHOOPS

Chapter 3

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

That evening, Revali gets a text from an unknown number.

“hey it’s link!! sidon texted me :D”

“I don’t know why you think I’m invested in your relationship, because I really am not,” he responds, then adds in for good measure, “also I barely know you”

“: (“

“I’m sorry, would you like me to act more supportive? Yay. Go you. Hoo-rah. You’ve managed to snag a text from the most eligible giraffe in town.”

“he’s not a giraffe! if he were an animal i bet he’d be a shark or something. i mean, those eyes”

“If you’re going to start rhapsodizing, please kill me first :)”

“hey i got you to smile though! : ) : ) : )”

“I smile only at the thought of the sweet release of death saving me from your crappy Sharkboy and Lavagirl reenactment”

“what does that make you”

“Done with this conversation, is what.” He throws down his phone, ignoring its vibrating, and goes to sleep. Or tries to, anyway.

It only fully hits him in the morning what he’s done to himself. He’s managed to third-wheel himself indefinitely, all because he has a ridiculous crush on an adorable and completely unattainable guy.

His love life is a trashfire.

It is, he concludes, all Leuco’s fault. Which reminds him, how did that guy know about the marriage thing anyway? He…oh.

Oh, that little jerk.

He confronts Leuco at work, but he just smiles beatifically and pats Revali on the shoulder. “You’re welcome, bro. Got you his number, didn’t I?”

“When I die, I’m haunting you,” Revali hisses, then stomps into the kitchen to bake stress cupcakes.

He doesn’t even look at the texts from Link until his break, when seeing the red notification bubbles gets to be too much to bear. They read, “that’s not a character in sharkboy and lavagirl”

“revali?”

“: (“

“did i say something?”

Then, about ten minutes later, “i’m sorry. i shouldn’t have put any of this on you. i’ll stop texting you until sidon says something”

Revali stares at his phone, then sighs, running his hand through his hair. Finally, because he’s clearly a masochist, he responds, “Some of us do have sleep schedules, you know. You can talk to me.”

A few minutes later, he gets a text that just says “:D”

“Not about Sidon though.”

“i’ll restrain myself somehow : )”

“Also, can you tone down the emoticons”

The response is immediate this time. “never”




About five days of texting later, Link lets Revali know that Sidon wants to hang out, apparently for a Lord of the Rings marathon, which Link gushes about for a little while (“we’re clearly perfect for each other revali i LOVE lotr”) and which Revali despairs over for even longer, because what is he even doing.

He arrives at the apartment on time, as always—punctuality is incredibly important to him—which ends up being awkward because that means he and Sidon are alone for a while.

“So,” Sidon says, resting his hand on his chin, “Tell me about yourself. You work at the bakery, right?”

Revali sends him a confused look. “I mean, you’re there every week, I think you know that.”

“Oh, you’ve noticed me?” Sidon looks pleased.

“It’s hard not to notice,” Revali gestures at Sidon’s tall frame. “That.”

He looks even more pleased. “Well, I—”

The doorbell rings, and Sidon exhales. “Sorry, I’ll get that.”

It’s Link, of course, looking about as excited as it is possible to look. “Revali, hey!” he signs.

“Hello. You’re late.”

“A wizard is never late,” he signs dismissively.

Revali raises an eyebrow, confused again. “You’re not a wizard.”

“No, it’s a quote—wait, have you never seen Lord of the Rings?!”

“No?”

“What have you been doing all your life?”

Sidon watches the exchange, clearly not understanding a bit, and Revali sighs. “Let’s just get started.”

They begin the first movie, which Link watches, rapt. Sidon quotes parts of it, and while Revali doesn’t translate it, Link signs portions as well. They really are made for each other, he thinks despondently, and, what am I doing here?

After the first movie is done, Link starts signing excitedly, “I will never get over that movie.”

Revali duly translates.

“Me neither,” says Sidon happily. “Legolas was totally my childhood crush.”

“I was an Aragorn kid myself,” Link signs, nodding, “But I totally get it.”

“Aragorn is hot, don’t get me wrong, but there’s something about elves. I think it’s the ears.”

“Definitely the ears,” Link confirms, and they’re smiling at each other and Revali’s heart hurts.

They want to move on to the second movie, but Revali has work in the morning, and he’s pretty done with this anyway.

“Well, just means we’ll have to save it for another time. Right, Revali?”

Revali screams internally. “Yeah. Sure.”

Link walks out with him, obviously floating on air. As soon as they’re gone, he starts signing, rapidfire. “He’s so perfect, don’t you think? Like, he was so kind and inviting and—”

“I thought I said I didn’t want to talk about him,” Revali snaps, aware he’s scowling but not really able to do anything about it.

Link pauses, then signs like he’s just had a revelation, “Wait, do you not like him?”

Revali stares at him incredulously. “Really, it took you this long to figure out?”

“Why? You don’t even know him.”

“And you do?” Revali asks nastily, all of his irritation and frustration coming out. “You see a guy with nice abs in your figure drawing class, hear his sister talk about him a few times, maybe see him talking with friends once or twice, and you decide you’re in love with him?”

Link ducks his head, but Revali keeps going.

“You don’t know Sidon, and it’s not keeping you from having a crush on him. You don’t know me, and it’s not keeping you from pretending like we’re best friends. So if you get to make snap judgments, so do I, and I don’t like him, no matter how ‘kind’ and ‘inviting’ and ‘perfect’ he is, and you don’t get to change that!”

Link presses his lips together. Finally, he signs, “The difference is that I’m trying to believe the best in people while you’re dismissing people before you even get to know them. Believe me when I say that if I were to do the same to you, we’d never speak again.”

Then he turns on his heel and walks away.

Notes:

yikes

i still feel like revali is hopelessly ooc in this fic but it feels a bit better in this chapter maybe? i'll keep trying to adjust it

also a bunch of y'all pointed out that leuco knew what link was saying. honestly it was a mistake on my part but i like the idea of him just being a lil stinker so i kept it

Chapter 4

Notes:

cw: food

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Revali rarely feels bad about his interactions with other people. While he may come across as rude or arrogant, it’s never much bothered him.

He’s bothered now.

It’s not just because he has a crush on Link, though that’s part of it. It’s not even that Link hasn’t texted him since that night, though that’s a part of it too.

It’s that he’s starting to wonder if he might have, for once, been in the wrong, and that doesn’t sit well with him.

Not about Sidon. He still doesn’t like him. Objectively, he realizes that there’s probably no reason to dislike him—he seems a nice enough guy, perhaps overly friendly for Revali’s taste, but nice. Revali knows he dislikes Sidon just because Link likes him, but he’s not too bent out of shape about that.

But getting mad at Link for having a crush on Sidon when he barely knows him when Revali’s done the exact same thing to Link, that might have been wrong, and Revali doesn’t know how to process that.

Eventually, he gives in and texts Link, “While I maintain my right to dislike Sidon, it was, perhaps, slightly wrong of me to blow up at you just because you do, regardless of your reasons. So, sorry about that.”

Link reads it, but doesn’t respond for another hour, during which time Revali stress bakes lemon bars, which he never does because they’re Leuco’s favorite and Revali doesn’t do things for Leuco.

When he does finally respond, it’s to say, “only slightly wrong?”

“This is an apology, not a negotiation.”

“it’s kind of messed up that not only are you only marginally apologizing but that you refuse to acknowledge that you are also in the wrong for only marginally apologizing for what was not a marginal thing”

Revali doesn’t know how to respond to that.

“bc not only did you insult me for something that i’m not really in control of, aka my feelings for sidon, you also insulted me for trying to befriend you and i really have no idea how to process that in a way that doesn’t come out to you either being severely emotionally maladjusted or just a dick”

“I mean, it’s probably both,” Revali concedes after a few moments.

“at least you admit it”

“Look, I can admit I’m a dick, but can you also maybe try to understand why I have a hard time believing you want to be friends?”

“why is that”

“You came into the bakery because you wanted to see Sidon, which means talking to me that first day was because of him. You talked to me the second time because you wanted me to translate, which means the second time was also because of Sidon. You started texting me because, again, of Sidon. Can you see why it’s difficult to think you might value me for anything other than the ability to communicate with him”

“…i guess i can see what you mean, and that was crappy of me to make you feel like that, but i promise i wouldn’t have kept in contact with you if i didn’t enjoy your company”

Revali chews on his lip. His brain whispers liar, he must be lying, but his fingers tap out, “Thanks, I appreciate that.”

“look at us, communicating like adults”

“I’m an adult. You’re still basically an infant, college student.”

“um??? unfair? i made myself a packet of mac and cheese yesterday thank you very much???”

“The packaged kind? I’m sorry, we can’t be friends anymore. If you let me know before coming to the bakery I’ll get the ingredients to make you some actual macaroni and cheese, which I am incidentally the best at.”

“so we are friends?” Link asks, and Revali can feel the uncertainty radiating off of the words.

“If you’ll forgive me for being a dick, I can forgive you for being a mac and cheese heathen, sure.”

“haha deal : ) how about i come by tomorrow?”

Revali pauses. “But Sidon only comes on Fridays. Tomorrow is a Wednesday.”

“yep”

Revali smiles to himself. “Tomorrow works.” He puts his phone away and just stares at nothing for a moment.

“Who’s slacking off now,” Leuco asks, casually leaning against the doorway to the kitchen.

“Clearly still you.” Revali retorts. “Now test these lemon bars, I need to make sure they’re good enough to go out.”

Leuco gasps, then says reverently, “You do love me.”

“No.”

“Being in love has changed you, and now you are a benevolent spirit of goodness and lemon bars.”

“I’ll never make them again if you don’t shut up,” Revali threatens.

Leuco mimes zipping his mouth, then mimes unzipping it to whisper thoughtfully to himself, “I need my mouth hole to eat.”

He takes three lemon bars. Revali almost doesn’t mind.

True to his word, Link comes by the next day. Revali doesn’t notice until he checks the kitchen door window to see Leuco and Link conversing in sign.

He bursts through the doors and says hurriedly, “Whatever he’s saying isn’t true.”

Leuco smiles angelically. “It’s not true that the weather has been unusually cold lately?”

Link tilts his head curiously. “Why, what did you think we were talking about?”

“Uh…” Revali turns pink. “Nothing, Leuco’s just a pathological liar.”

“That’s true,” Leuco says confidentially, then winks. “Or is it?”

Link smiles bemusedly. “Right, well…I was promised some actual mac and cheese.”

“You never offered to make me macaroni and cheese,” Leuco complains. “Why don’t you love me like that?”

“Go away, Leuco,” Revali says, exasperated. “I’ll let you have some if there are leftovers.”

He brightens. “Yay.”

Link asks, “Can I watch you make it? My dad never made home-cooked meals.”

“Sure, but it won’t be very interesting.”

“More interesting than sitting out at the table hoping someone will like my latest selfie.”

(He had sent the aforementioned selfie to Revali, who had indeed liked it, but had instead responded “Stop taking pictures of yourself in class and try to learn something you egomaniac.” He thinks he expressed himself well.)

Revali gets out the ingredients and starts cooking. Link asks a few questions— what’s that red stuff? (Smoked paprika.) What kind of pasta is that? (Gemelli; it had been his grandpa’s favorite.) Is your grandpa still around? (…No, and please don’t ask about it.)

Eventually the macaroni and cheese is done, and Revali proudly serves it to Link, who takes a bite and makes a pleased noise.

“I’d compliment the chef, but I need my hands for eating,” he signs brusquely before picking back up his fork and shoveling a truly obscene amount of pasta into his mouth. Revali smiles proudly.

If this is what having a friend is like, he sort of likes it.

Notes:

communication is important kids

macaroni and cheese is also important

Chapter 5

Notes:

cw food, death mention

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

It becomes something like a tradition—Link comes in on Wednesdays and Revali cooks for him. He’s not the most amazing cook in the world—baking is his one true love—but he’s better than Link, which is admittedly not hard, and he can follow a recipe. So he cooks, and Link talks to him, and they get to know each other better.

Link, he learns, is kind of a dork. He loves drawing and fantasy and he used to do competitive fencing. His best friend and roommate is named Zelda; she’s a year younger and a mechanical engineering major. Link likes dogs, unironically has a three wolf moon shirt, and collects antique weapons. (“Why,” Revali asks in horror the first time he goes over to Link’s apartment. Link looks surprised that he would even ask. “I like them. Plus, it can’t hurt to be prepared.” “For what, Link?! What circumstance could possibly necessitate the use of a claymore?!” Link just smiles mysteriously, and Revali never asks again.)

In return, Revali slowly opens up. He likes baking, birds, and archery—not, obviously, in any kind of combination. His favorite accessory is his blue scarf, less because it’s fashionable and more because he’s always cold, and he has a truly ridiculous amount of cookbooks.

They talk about deeper things, too. One day, as Link is eating from a fresh batch of chocolate chip cookies, Revali is almost surprised to hear himself say, “My grandpa used to make these for me whenever I was upset. I was upset a lot, but he always made them when I asked.” Revali pauses, lost in his memories. “He used to say that good food made anything better. Sadness, tribulation, heartache; all you had to do was eat something delicious and it’d all go away for a while.”

Link has stopped eating. He’s smiling gently. “He sounds great.”

“Yeah, he was.” Revali wraps his arms around himself. “I think he was wrong, though, because after he died I baked and baked and ate and ate and it still didn’t make it better.”

Link’s eyes are thoughtful, then he signs, “Sometimes there aren’t solutions. Sometimes you…sometimes you draw, and draw, and your mother still doesn’t wake up, even though she said she’d always be around to tell you your art was wonderful.” He smiles, but his eyes are pained. “Sometimes it just works like that.”

“Yeah,” Revali says softly, and they don’t say anything more.

If Revali is being honest, he’s sort of settled himself on being friends with Link by now. He still has a crush, a crush that intensifies with each passing day, but it’s not like anything is going to happen, so he’s content with how things are going right now. It’s not perfect, but not much in Revali’s life is—and, as Link said, sometimes there aren’t solutions, and he’s pretty sure this is one of those times.

The upside to the whole thing is that Sidon is apparently completely oblivious. They work their way through the rest of Lord of the Rings, then move on to The Hobbit, and Link is about as charming as a person can be, which is very charming, and Sidon doesn’t notice once. Link’s been trying not to talk about Sidon as much since their conversation, but Revali knows he’s frustrated.

Oddly enough, sometimes when Sidon thinks nobody is looking, it looks like he is too.

Revali doesn’t get it. He’s not complaining, but he doesn’t get it. Sidon isn’t a particularly shy person; far from it, really. So why is Sidon chickening out on getting together with Link?

Things don’t really change, stuck in a strange kind of limbo, until Link gives Sidon Revali’s phone number.

Revali gets a message from an unknown number on a Friday, while Link, Mipha, and Sidon are over at their usual table.

“Hey! I got your number from Link. It’s Sidon?”

Revali looks over at the table, and Sidon smiles and waves.

“Hello. I don’t know how to break this to you, but I’m sort of busy,” Revali types dryly, pressing ‘send’ and then raising an eyebrow directly at Sidon.

“Oh, I know. Just wanted to make sure you had my number! :)”

Revali frowns and goes back to work. He can’t imagine why—maybe to more easily coordinate movie nights? Whatever.

He gets an answer, of a sort, when Sidon texts him later that night.

“Hey again!”

“Hello.”

“Just got off from a modeling thing, so my back is really sore :(“

“Sorry.” Why on earth is he telling him this?

“You know what might make me feel better?”

“Rest, ibuprofen, and some IcyHot?”

“Haha, that too! But I was thinking more like a change of pace.”

Revali frowns. “How so?”

“There’s this new fantasy movie out and I thought maybe we could see it together?”

Oh. Another night of translation. “Sure.”

“Great! Great. How about tomorrow, around 7PM?”

“Sounds good.” He switches the conversation to Link and texts, “Going out this time, that’s new.”

Link, as per usual, responds quickly. “what?”

“The movie with Sidon tomorrow? He didn’t text you about it?”

“no…?”

“Must have meant for me to pass it on. Well, we’re going to a movie tomorrow at 7. He said it was a fantasy thing.”

“oh i’ve been wanting to see that one actually! i was even gonna take you bc im nice like that.”

“You subjecting me to another three hours of intense fantasy violence is you being nice?”

“you don’t want to see me when i’m mean ;) anyway, good timing. i’ll put on my saturday best”

“So your three wolf moon shirt?”

“frick u that shirt is amazing wolves are so cool i wanna be a wolf”

“You eat like one already.”

“not my fault you only feed me once a week : (”

“I knew it. You’re only with me for the free food.”

“yeah i’m def with you for the free ROASTS get it”

“I get it, and I am disgusted.”

“nah you love me”

Revali flops back on his bed.

This all would be so much easier if that weren’t true.

Notes:

revali what are you doing calling someone else oblivious, you utter hypocrite

Chapter 6

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The next day, Revali drives to the movie theatre. As always, he’s on time, and Sidon is there waiting, looking nervous.

“Revali, hey! Thank you so much for agreeing to come.”

Revali tilts his head. Sidon is always so confusing. “Why wouldn’t I?”

“Well—”

He’s about to answer when Link shows up, wearing his three wolf moon shirt and a grin. “Hey, Revali, you predicted the future.”

Revali groans. “You’re absolutely the worst, and I don’t know why I associate with you.”

When he turns back to Sidon, he has a pinched smile on his face. “Right. Hm. Okay.”

“You okay?” Link signs, worried, and Revali translates.

“Yeah, just…tired.”

They watch the movie, Sidon sitting in between Revali and Link, and when it’s over, Link starts analyzing it.

“I thought the romance was pretty contrived,” Link signs. “Like, if they had ever just talked to one another about their feelings, I’m pretty sure the entire subplot would have been resolved. Good swords, though.”

Revali translates, then pauses. “Okay, you guys are going to laugh at me, but I think I left my candy in the theatre, and there’s no way that I’m not eating the last of it.”

“You’re ridiculous, but go. We’ll wait for you,” Link signs with a smile.

Revali apologizes, then jogs off to the room where the movie was playing. He hears footsteps behind him, but doesn’t think too much of it until they follow him into the room.

He whirls around, relaxing when he sees Sidon. “Oh, hey—”

“What is up with you?” Sidon demands.

Revali blinks. “What do you mean?”

“You give off such mixed signals,” Sidon says, running a hand through his hair, clearly frustrated. “One minute you’re flirting and charming and kind, and the next you’re distant and closed off and—you invited Link to our date, Revali!”

Revali blinks some more. “What.”

“I was so excited that you had finally agreed to go out with me for real, but you’re still hiding behind your friend, who—by the way, why does he even agree to this? There’s being a good wingman and then there’s this. Are you sure he’s not secretly in love with you, because—”

“I am not at all following this conversation,” Revali says blankly.

“I like you, okay, but I can’t deal with this hot cold business. I don’t deserve that. So just let me know whether you feel the same for once, because—”

Revali holds up a hand, massaging his temples with the other. “Okay. Let me get this straight. You like me.”

“Yes.”

“Like, romantically.”

“Obviously.”

“None of this is obvious,” Revali reassures him disbelievingly. “And you think Link is my wingman?”

“You’re pretending to translate for him because you’re too shy to flirt with me yourself, right?”

Revali’s eyes twitch. “Okay, there’s been…like, the most monumental misunderstanding somehow, I don’t even—I really am translating for him. He’s been trying to get you to ask him out for ages.”

“Link likes me?” Sidon asks incredulously.

“For some reason.”

Sidon’s face falls. “And you don’t?”

“I mean, you’re a nice guy,” Revali hedges.

“This is so embarrassing,” Sidon moans, hiding his face and crouching to the ground dramatically. “The first time you came up to me, I assumed you’d noticed me staring at you, and—”

“Why would you be staring at me?” Revali asks, then thinks it through and winces. “Oh. Sorry.”

“Yeah.”

There’s a silence, then, “So it’s Link who’s been saying the nice things and talking about elves all this time?”

“I know crap-all about elves,” Revali says, nodding. “Other than that they’re always ridiculously hot in those movies of yours.”

“It is pretty ridiculous,” Sidon concedes, then says speculatively, “So if I asked Link out, he’d probably say yes, right?”

Revali’s heart stops.

“I mean, he’s pretty cute. And it seems like he’s the one I’ve liked all this time anyway.”

Revali clenches his teeth and forces a smile. “Yeah. He’d say yes. Go for it.”

Sidon pauses, frowning. “Really? You look kind of like—”

“I look like somebody who wants you to ask his friend out already, so like I said, go for it,” he growls. “I’ve got my candy, you’ve got your guy, my duty is fulfilled, so I’m going to leave.”

He storms out, leaving Sidon looking speculative in a darkened theatre.

Link catches him on the way out. “Revali? You look awful.”

“Allergies. I think Sidon wants to talk to you about something.”

“Revali, come on, what’s wrong—”

“Absolutely nothing except for that darned pollen. Anyway, you and Sidon, so much to talk about, without me.”

“Without you? Revali, I don’t—“

“Look, there’s Sidon now!” He points at Sidon, who is indeed emerging from the room.

Then, not bothering to see whether Link is looking at Sidon or not, he runs away.




His phone vibrates so much that he hides it under his pillow. He doesn’t want to deal with Link. He’s probably texting him about how Sidon asked him out, and Revali will have to be a supportive friend, and he has no idea how to do that right now.

He wakes up the next morning and makes brownies, cookies, cupcakes, cheesecakes. He runs out of ingredients, goes to the store, buys some more. Tarts, crisps, pies. He bakes everything he can think of until he’s surrounded by it all, alone in the kitchen with nothing but his baking and his hopeless feelings for Link, and then he slumps to the floor and just stares at the kitchen cupboards.

He is, he thinks distantly, going to have to do so many dishes.

Part of him knows he’s being ridiculous. He had known this would happen the whole time. He had prepared himself.

But it’s so, so much different when it’s actually happening. He can feel it right in his chest, a deep aching, and his brain whispers to him everyone leaves you, and it’s what you deserve.

Because Link will leave him, won’t he? It’s not like Revali will come along on their dates to translate. Revali huffs humorlessly at the very idea. Slowly, bit by bit, Link will go further and further, and Revali will be right here, until he can’t reach Link anymore.

He’s interrupted from his thoughts by the door ringing. He gets up woodenly and answers it, and his eyes widen.

It’s Link, and he looks furious.

Notes:

pls note that revali is an incredibly unreliable narrator so sidon is not exactly as over this as revali thinks but he is very smart

what will link say to revali?! how will revali respond?! what will he do with all of these baked goods??!?!!??! find out next time...on Cliches The Fic

Chapter 7

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Link doesn’t wait for Revali to invite him in, which is unfortunate because Revali wouldn’t have done it in the first place. He just pushes past, then whirls on Revali, tapping his feet.

“I’ve been texting, I’ve been calling, you haven’t responded at all, I thought you were hurt or—”

Revali just wants this to be over. “Nope. Completely fine. You can leave now.”

Link looks at him incredulously. “I’m not going to leave. Tell me what’s wrong, now.”

“I said nothing.”

Link raises an eyebrow. “Really? Because I can smell your baking from here.”

Revali winces as Link storms into the kitchen, then gasps. “Revali. Seriously, what happened last night? Sidon wouldn’t tell me, just said it was something we’d have to work out on our own or something.”

“Right, him,” Revali mutters bitterly. “Shouldn’t you be, like, frolicking right now?”

“Why would I be frolicking?” Link demands.

“Didn’t he ask you out?”

Link’s breath hitches. “What?”

“He sort of implied he was going to.”

“He—I—” Link shakes his head. “You’re trying to distract me.”

“Only if it’s working,” Revali says, attempting to joke.

“It’s not,” Link says dryly. “It must have been something really big if you baked this much. What happened?”

Revali hesitates, then decides, whatever. Link is going to leave him anyway. Might as well have him go out with a bang. “I already told you what happened,” he whispers, “so figure it out.”

“All you told me is that he implied he was going to ask me out.”

Revali looks away. “Yeah.”

“You’re unhappy about that? Why?” Link looks genuinely confused.

“Why do you think, Link?” Revali stares straight in Link’s eyes. “Why do you think I disliked Sidon from the moment I met him, even though I didn’t know him? Why do you think I got so mad that you liked him? Why do you think I cook for you, or put up with movie nights watching you pine after someone else, or think your terrible choice in shirts is adorable, or do any of the dozen ridiculous things that I do for you?”

Link’s eyes are wide and luminous.

“Like I said,” he mumbles bitterly, losing steam and flushing deeply. “Figure it out.”

“Oh, Revali,” Link signs slowly.

“You don't have to say anything. I’d prefer you didn’t, actually. I know how things are going to work, and one of us is going to end up unhappy any way you slice it, and I’d rather it be me than you.”

“I don’t want you to be unhappy,” Link signs with a frown.

“Yeah, well, sometimes there aren’t solutions, remember?” Revali snaps, suddenly irritated. “Sometimes we don’t get everything we want, or anything we want, and we just deal with it, because that’s all life has for us, and that has to be fine if we want to keep going.” He wraps his arms around himself protectively. “I’d like you to leave now, please.”

“But—”

Please, Link. None of this is your fault, but for once you’re not going to help by being here.”

Link stands stagnant for a while, then signs a small, “I’m sorry,” and leaves.

Revali sighs as he slides back down to the floor.

This just sucks all around.



He gets a text from Sidon that night.

“Hey”

“No offense, but why are you talking to me?”

“…Look, I know you don’t like me, but can you at least respect that you broke my heart a little bit yesterday?”

Revali blinks. “What”

“I really did like you. That’s not something that’s going to go away immediately just because I found out you weren’t who I thought I was.”

Revali deflates. “I guess I hadn’t thought about it quite that way. I’m sorry.”

There’s a pause, then, “You’re in love with Link, right?”

“…”

“Not really a question, I know you are. You’re kind of obvious.”

“…………………..”

“I just wanted to let you know I’m not actually going to ask him out just like that. That would be so utterly crappy of me.”

“Wait. Wait wait wait. No. You’re not going to do the whole self-sacrifice thing just because I like him, right? Because he really really likes you, and”

“So you’re allowed to sacrifice yourself but I’m not? But that’s not why. I need to process everything first, and I’m not going to move on without some time. It would be a total dick move to just decide I like Link now.”

“I guess. But…give him a chance, at least. He deserves that. He deserves to be happy.”

“So do you, you know.”

“Doesn’t mean it’ll happen.”

“You’re a really stubborn guy, huh? Look, I’ll give him a chance, but you have to give yourself one as well. Life isn’t all bad.”

Revali’s grandpa used to say that too. He bites his lip, then responds, “Thanks. You really are a nice guy.”

“Somehow that seems more complimentary than before :)”

It is, but he doesn’t say that. He says, “Shut up,” and congratulates himself again on a thought well-expressed.

Revali and Sidon end up texting for another hour, and by the morning, Revali feels a bit more peaceful. At least Link will end up with someone who’s truly a good person, he reminds himself. That's what matters.

Link, on the other hand, does not text him, and he doesn’t come in on Wednesday, either. Revali is grateful for the distance, but he misses him, too.

Leuco picks up on it, because for someone so irritating, he’s surprisingly astute. “Your boyfriend’s didn’t come today,” he comments. “Are you two fighting?”

“He’s not my boyfriend, and sort of.”

“That sucks. I like him. You should apologize for whatever you did.”

Revali narrows his eyes. “What makes you think I did something?”

“You’re an emotionally constipated dickwad, of course you did something.”

Revali scowls. “This time, I think it really is nobody’s fault.”

“Sometimes,” Leuco says wisely, “That’s when you need to apologize most.”

Revali looks at him, then away. “Maybe.”

Notes:

poor...everyone, really

Chapter 8

Notes:

cw food

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Revali bakes a batch of chocolate chip cookies, then drops by Link’s apartment. He’s sort of planning to just leave them at the door, but while he’s putting down the cookies, the door opens.

Standing there is a short blonde girl with her hands on her hips. He’s only ever seen her in pictures, but he knows this is Zelda.

Expression inscrutable, she says, “Dingdong ditching is sort of kindergarten, don’t you think?”

Choosing not to respond, he sticks out his hand and says, “Zelda, right? I’m Revali.”

“I know. He managed to get a selfie of you two together once and he sent it to me at least three times with different glitter filters on it. Are you the reason Link hasn’t gone to any of his classes for the week? He won’t talk to me.”

He winces. “I think it’s a fair guess that I’m part of it.”

Her eyes narrow. “Do I need to hit you?”

Revali pauses, frowning. “I mean, I’d prefer you didn’t.”

“Give me a cookie, and if it’s good, we have a deal.” She beckons. “Come on.”

He gives one to her and she eats a bite. She chews, and Revali waits for her verdict. Finally, she says, “I hate Link a little bit right now for knowing you for months and never once bringing one of these home for me.”

“Well, as long as he gets at least one, you can have the rest,” Revali offers. “Anyway, I should probably—”

“Oh no, you don’t get to leave. You’re going to deliver these to that lump under the covers personally, and you’re going to work things out with him.”

Revali bites his lip, but he did come to apologize, after all. “Okay. Fine.”

He heads to Link’s room and knocks on the door, calling out softly, “Link? Do you mind if I come in?” Link can’t exactly respond verbally, so he opens the door anyway to check.

True to Zelda’s words, Link is under the covers, but a hand comes out and signs, “It’s fine.”

“I brought cookies and an apology,” Revali says.

Link peeks out from under the covers, then signs, “Why are you apologizing?”

“Because this isn’t a situation that either of us are responsible for, but I made you feel bad about it anyway because I was hurting. I don’t want you to feel like you have to be sorry for not returning my feelings, or for liking Sidon, or for any of it. It’s just the way things are, and I’ll be fine eventually, but in the meantime I don’t want you to blame yourself.”

Link looks down. “But I made you so sad—”

You didn’t make me sad,” Revali interrupts. “My unrealistic expectations made me sad, and that means I need to make the change, not you.”

Link nods slowly, then his lip trembles. “So…does this mean…we can still be friends?”

Revali’s heart melts. “Of course, Link. That was never in doubt.”

And for once, he said exactly what he meant, and Link is smiling, so everything is all right.




Sidon still texts Revali, and with Revali’s bias gone, they actually get to be friends, of a sort. Sidon mostly sends him badly-Photoshopped pictures of sharks with encouraging speech bubbles, and Revali mostly tells him to stop being such an insufferably cheerful and kind person, and Sidon laughs it off.

Two weeks later, Sidon asks Link out on a date. Link hesitates to even tell him, but Revali congratulates him, and this time he genuinely means it. It still hurts, but Revali would rather have him with Sidon than anyone else in the world, and Link is clearly happy, so Revali can deal with it. Maybe not well, but he can deal with it.

Link and Sidon continue to go out, and after three dates, they make it official. Surprisingly, it doesn’t change all that much. Link still comes by the bakery for lunch on Wednesdays, but now him and Sidon walk in together on Fridays. (Zelda comes too, now. She says that she’s been missing out on cookie heaven for too long to not indulge.)

Revali still feels a pang in his heart when he sees them together, but it’s manageable, and Link still hasn’t left, so he tells himself it’s all right.

About a month into Sidon and Link’s relationship, Sidon starts trying to set Revali up with his friends. It’s incredibly irritating.

“Hey, Revali, so I have this friend—”

“Which is astonishing, given you’re the worst.”

“Ha ha. Anyway, he’s a total sweetheart. His name is Yunobo, and I really think—”

“No,” Revali says sweetly.

Sidon frowns and lowers his voice. “Revali, I really think it’ll do you good to explore your options, you know? You’ve said no to every person that I’ve brought up here. Would you do this for me?”

“Still no.”

“Would you do it for Link?”

Voice saccharine, he puts on his best customer smile and says, “If you want us to continue speaking, you will stop right there.”

Sidon pouts.

As it happens, though, things happen more naturally. One Thursday, Leuco pops back into the kitchen and says, “Some kid wants to talk to you. She’s really set on it.”

Revali raises an eyebrow. “Why should I care?”

“Come on, dude, she’s like six. Try being a decent person for once.”

He goes out, sighing, only to find a serious-eyed girl.

“I ate one of your cinnamon rolls,” she says solemnly. “It was very good.”

“Thanks?”

“I’m so sorry,” an apologetic voice comes from behind the girl. “She heard the phrase ‘my compliments to the chef’ somewhere and she takes it very seriously.” It’s a man in his mid-twenties. His hair is a tawny brown, he’s wearing a suit, and he looks incredibly harried.

“It’s fine,” Revali says, then pauses. “Did you get anything?”

“Pardon?”

“To eat, or to drink. You look like you could use it.”

“Oh, um, no—”

“Hang on a moment.” Revali trots behind the counter, calling out, “Any allergies?”

“No, but—”

He selects a cookie—they’re out of chocolate chip, but he has molasses—and hands them over to the man. “There you go. On the house.”

“I couldn’t possibly accept—”

“You both can and will.” Revali raises an eyebrow. “Eat.”

He takes a hesitant bite, then another. “This is really good,” he says, looking down at the cookie wonderingly.

“Don’t sound so surprised,” Revali says dryly, then begins to walk away.

“Wait,” the man begins. “What’s your name?”

Revali turns around again. “Revali.”

“I’m Tyto, and this is my daughter Athene.” The man smiles, and it transforms his entire face into something more youthful, and honestly pretty attractive. “Thank you. You’re very kind.”

Revali doesn’t know how to respond to that, so he just gives the man—Tyto—a thumbs up.

Leuco is behind the counter again, an amused smile on his face, and he watches the man leave, then mockingly gives Revali a thumbs up of his own.

“What was I supposed to say?” Revali demands. “‘Yes, I am very kind, thank you for noticing?’”

“He was into you, dude.”

“What? Stop being ridiculous and work for once, jeez.”

“Just saying. Bet you he comes back.”

“You were so right last time,” Revali shoots back.

Leuco grins. “Oh, I’m always right eventually,” he says mysteriously.

With that ominous declaration thoroughly ignored, Revali goes back into the kitchen and makes more cookies.

Notes:

tyto is from tyto alba, the barn owl, while athene is from athene noctua, the little owl

i have the plot planned out pretty far for once, so strap in for what i have just dubbed the 'jealousy and bad decisions arc'

Chapter 9

Notes:

cw food

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

The next day, while Revali is on his lunch break, Tyto arrives, looking a lot healthier.

“Hello again,” he says with a small, awkward wave.

Revali remembers Leuco and “bet you he comes back” and then firmly chastises himself for remembering. “Oh, hello again. No Athene?”

“Oh! No, she’s at school. I was actually…her mother suddenly couldn’t pick her up, and it was a teacher conference day, so.” He shrugs. “That’s why I was so stressed out, because I had to leave work and Athene was in a bad mood and—”

“You don’t have to explain yourself,” Revali interrupts. “We all have days where we could use something sweet. Speaking of, I’m on my break right now, but Leuco can help you pick out something?”

“Oh, um, sure. Do you have any recommendations?”

“I mean, everything is amazing, thanks, but the cream puffs are fresh.”

“Sounds good to me.” He walks over and pays for a cream puff, then comes back near Revali. “Sorry, this is presumptuous of me, but would you mind some company?”

Leuco is grinning from behind the counter, and Revali glares at him before looking back at Tyto, who is starting to look nervous. “You can sit here, if that’s what you mean.”

“Oh, thank you.”

He sits down, then stares at his cream puff, looking slightly perplexed.

“You okay there?” Revali asks.

“Yes, just…this is embarrassing to admit, but I’ve never had one of these before, and I have no idea what to expect.”

Revali purses his lips, trying to control a devious smile. “I promise it’s good. Just bite into it.”

He nods, takes a deep breath, then takes a delicate bite of the cream puff, causing it to spurt all over his face.

He looks so utterly dismayed at this development that Revali starts to laugh.

“You set me up,” Tyto says with a pout and a huge glob of cream on his nose.

“You’ve got—you’ve got a little—” Revali is trying to speak through his laughter, but it’s a bit hard. “Just a little—”

“I take it back. You’re not a kind person at all,” Tyto accuses, but he’s smiling, and soon he starts laughing helplessly as well.

It’s to this scene that Link, Sidon, Mipha, and Zelda walk in.

“New friend?” Link signs.

Revali pauses before smiling and nodding, signing back, “I think so.”

“Care to introduce us?” Sidon asks, having observed the conversation. He’s learned a little sign language since dating Link, but he’s not very good yet, so they mostly communicate via the written word when gestures won't do.

“Sure. Tyto, this is Link, Sidon, Mipha, and Zelda. They’re friends and regular customers. And this is Tyto, he came in with his daughter yesterday.”

“Yesterday?” Link signs with an odd look on his face.

Sidon interrupts Revali’s planned response with, “Oh, so you’re married then?” He looks almost disappointed.

“Uh, no. I’m afraid my ex-wife wasn’t really interested in staying with me when I told her I was gay,” Tyto says with a strained smile. “Don’t blame her.”

Sidon’s expression turns positively delighted. “Her loss, someone else’s gain, right?” Then he shoots a meaningful look at Revali, who scowls.

“Well, we’ll let you get back to it,” Mipha says tactfully.

Revali moves to get up. “Oh, I can get you guys your cookies—”

“I can do it!” Leuco says brightly. “I’m a good employee!”

“No, you’re not,” Revali says bemusedly, but Sidon speaks over him, something about what a good idea that is.

Link still has an odd expression on his face, Revali notices, but he goes to sit down with the rest.

“Sorry about them,” Revali says apologetically. “They’re a bit…” He searches for a word, then supplies, “Horrible.”

Tyto laughs. “No, they seem nice.”

The conversation moves on, and to Revali’s surprise, it actually flows pretty well. Before he knows it, his break is up.

“Sorry,” he apologizes. “It’s been nice talking to you, though.”

“You too,” Tyto says with a smile. “But, um, actually, I was sort of wondering if…well, um, you see, there’s not really a good way of saying this, but…”

Revali raises his eyebrows.

“Would you, perhaps, like to continue this another time?” he says in a rush. “Like…over dinner, maybe?”

“Oh, I…” He bites his lip. “Um…”

Tyto waits hopefully, and Revali isn’t over Link in the least, but he can’t just say no, so he says, “Sure?”

Tyto exhales, then gives one of the brightest smiles Revali has ever seen. “Good. Great. I’ll give you my phone so you can input your number and we can talk over the details later?”

“Yeah,” Revali says, feeling slightly numb and very, very wrong.

Tyto leaves, still beaming to himself, and Revali walks back to the counter, dazed.

“You did it!” Sidon crows distantly, and Link is frowning, and all Revali can think of to do is to go in back and start baking again.




That night, Sidon texts him a shark saying “get it” and nothing else. Link texts him a few minutes later, saying “so, a date huh”

“It appears so”

“do you like this guy?”

“I mean, I barely know him. He seems nice.”

“hm. well…have fun i guess”

“Yeah.”

Link doesn’t text him after that, and Revali lays back in his bed and stares at the ceiling.

Does he like Tyto? Probably not, he concedes, at least not in the way Link means. Could he like him? Maybe, but Link...

And, the last and most important question, is it completely unfair to Tyto to go on a date with him knowing that Revali will be thinking about someone else?

Yes. Absolutely. A dick move, as Sidon would say.

But how else is he supposed to get over Link, anyway? And it’s just one date. Is that really so bad, to want to try to be happy with someone else, even if it’s just for a night?

Revali doesn’t know, and he still doesn’t know even after a long night of thinking about nothing else.

Notes:

poor tyto you're setting yourself up for a fall my good man

Chapter 10

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Tyto schedules their date for a week later, which means an entire week of agonizing over it on Revali’s part. Leuco and Sidon tease him mercilessly, but Link avoids the subject entirely, which Revali appreciates. He also seems more subdued somehow, but when Revali asks him about it, he just changes the subject.

The next Saturday comes, and Revali gets ready, lost in his own head. They’re meeting each other at the restaurant, so he drives there, only to find Tyto already present with what appears to be a feather, which is the same color as Revali’s hair.

Revali looks at the feather, then at Tyto inquiringly. He chuckles awkwardly. “Um, you mentioned you liked birds, and the color reminded me of you, so…”

This man, it occurs to Revali, is probably too good for him. “To echo your own words, you’re very kind.”

Tyto blushes bashfully, scratching his head. “Um, thank you. Want to get going?”

They walk into the restaurant and begin to talk. Tyto, Revali learns, is a graphic designer. He likes cats and science fiction, he plays piano, and he is awkward but very, very sweet, and he is not Link.

“Athene seems like a good kid,” Revali remarks. “Very smart.”

Tyto brightens visibly at the mention of his daughter. “Oh, she is. She reads a lot. She probably knows more than me, really.”

“Is she with you most of the time?”

“No, I get her every other weekend during the school year, every other week in the summer, and alternating holidays.” He sighs, looking down at his lap. “I wish we didn’t have to do this to her. She’s far too young to be dealing with me and Libora’s crap. I mean, she says she’s fine, but I can’t help but worry.”

“That just means you’re a good dad.”

Tyto smiles quietly, looking away. “If I were a better dad, I wouldn’t have caused this in the first place.”

Revali frowns. “You can’t blame yourself for being who you are.”

“But I can blame myself for being young and telling myself that I could be in love with her. I can blame myself for hating myself so much that I denied the truth for five years. I can blame myself for a lot of things.”

There’s a silence, then Revali says, “You can, sure, but where will it get you? What matters is that you are where you are now.”

“I guess.” He sounds uncertain.

“So,” Revali says, wisely deciding to change the subject. “You’d never had a cream puff before, huh?”

Tyto coughs, flushing. “No.”

“Why are you embarrassed about that?”

“I…sort of get sick when I eat sugar,” he whispers, almost apologetically. When Revali stares at him, he rushes to reassure, “But your baking is worth it! You’re really good!”

“I am, but why would you eat it if it makes you sick?”

“I mean, the first time, I couldn’t just refuse,” he says miserably. “And the second time, I really wanted to talk to you and I needed an excuse?” He’s trailed off by the end of it, and he’s a bright red.

Revali purses his lips, trying to keep from laughing again.

“You’re a horrible person,” Tyto accuses weakly. “Stop mocking my pain.”

“No, you’re just kind of adorable,” Revali says without thinking too much about it, and then they’re both red, and Tyto isn’t Link but maybe he could love him anyway.

But then it’s the end of the night, and Tyto walks him out to his car because that’s the sort of person he is, and Revali is about to get in when Tyto says, “I had a really good time tonight.”

“Me too,” Revali says, and he’s surprised to find he’s telling the truth.

“I…um, well…” And then he leans in, and Revali is frozen, and he sees Link, and he backs away.

“Sorry,” he mutters. “I’m…sorry.”

“No, it’s fine, I shouldn’t have—”

“No, it’s my fault—”

“No, really—”

They both stop and laugh quietly. “Um. Just give me some time, maybe?” Revali asks softly.

“I can do that,” Tyto says, gentle and understanding, and Revali curses himself for having met Link first and having fallen in love with him and still being in love with him when Tyto is here and good.

“I’ll talk to you later,” Revali says, and Tyto waves as he closes the door and drives away.

Sidon texts him an hour later, when he’s home lying in bed and questioning all of his life decisions.

“How did it go ;)”

“Well enough, I suppose. He’s a really good person.”

“Did you get any smooches?”

“You, on the other hand, are awful.” He hesitates. “And he tried.”

“You didn’t let him?!”

“I…couldn’t.”

“Oh, Revali :(“

“It’s fine. It’ll be fine. I’ll get over…everything, and…”

“Revali, you don’t have to force yourself to do anything you don’t want to or can’t do.”

“No, I’m just being ridiculous. I should be done with this by now.”

“:( I’m so sorry, Revali.”

“Why are you sorry? Actually, I don’t really care why, I just want you to stop.”

“>:) accept my love for you”

“No.”

“BTW, has Link said anything to you? He’s been acting sort of weird lately :/”

“To you too? I thought it was just me.”

“I guess he’ll tell us when he’s ready, but I hate to see him unsettled like this…:/”

Revali sighs, staring at the small, simple declaration of affection. This is how it should be, right?

“You are a good person too, you know.”

“Haha what? What brought that on?”

“Don’t make me take it back.”

“Nah. Thanks :)”

The conversation lulls after that, and Revali finally gives in and texts Link. “How are you doing?”

“fine”

It’s an uncharacteristically short response, and Revali frowns. “You don’t have to talk to me, but I’d prefer you don’t lie to me.”

“fine, i’m not fine, but i don’t know what is wrong either so can you give me a break?”

“…Yeah. Sorry.”

“it’s ok i guess”

Then, a few minutes later, “your thing was tonight right”

“Yeah.”

“was it good”

“Better than I thought, actually.” Because it was, even if he’s talking to the person who sort of ruined it.

“are you going to see him again”

“…Yeah, I think so.” He deserves to be happy too, right?

Doesn’t he?

Link doesn’t respond, though, and Revali is once again left alone with his thoughts.

Notes:

libora is from the ancient murrelet, synthliboramphus antiquus

link you are being patently ridiculous

Chapter 11

Notes:

cw: alcohol, drunkenness

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Tyto drops in on Thursdays now, just to say a brief hello, but they don’t go on another date until two weeks later, and that is when disaster strikes. Or begins to, anyway.

They’re out at an Indian restaurant—they both love spicy food—when they see Link and Sidon walk in.

“Oh, aren’t those your friends?” Tyto inquires mildly. Revali looks up and winces. What an incredibly terrible coincidence.

“Yeah.”

“Should we ask them to join us?”

“Oh, um…”

Link has spotted them by now and is heading over, that odd look back on his face. Sidon sends Revali an apologetic look.

“Heeey,” Sidon says awkwardly. “How are you two doing?”

“Well, thank you,” Tyto says with a smile. “And you?”

“We’re doing well also,” Sidon says, although Link looks anything but.

Link signs brusquely, “Do you mind if we join?”

Revali and Sidon grimace at the same time. “Uh, well.”

“What did he say?” Tyto asks, and unwillingly, Revali translates. “Oh, then, not at all!”

Link slides in on the side next to Tyto, and Sidon sits next to Revali.

“Why are you guys here, anyway?” Revali asks, feeling more than a little bit miffed and slightly panicky. “Link hates spicy food. I gave him something with black pepper in it once and he said it was too hot.”

Tyto hides his smile behind his hand, but Sidon looks almost betrayed. “Link, you didn’t tell me that.”

Link looks away. “It wasn’t that important.”

“It is important. We can leave and find someplace else,” Sidon offers, sending a glance at Revali.

“No, here is fine.”

Revali and Sidon both slump over slightly.

What follows is probably one of the most awkward dinners of Revali’s life. Link starts what is probably best termed an interrogation of Tyto, and Revali has to translate all of it, and Tyto looks increasingly uncomfortable, until Revali finally snaps, “Link, stop.”

“What?” he asks innocently.

“Don’t ask me what, you know precisely what you’re doing, and it’s making Tyto uncomfortable, so stop.”

Link looks away and scowls.

“It’s fine,” Tyto says weakly.

“No, it isn’t.” Revali sighs. “Tyto, I’m so sorry. Do you want to leave?”

He gives a small nod, and Revali glares at Link, who’s starting to look sort of guilty.

They pay for their food, and Sidon apologizes, and Tyto and Revali leave for the parking lot.

“I’m sorry,” Tyto says, eyes downcast. “I feel bad asking you to leave your friends behind.”

“He was being a dick,” Revali says angrily. “So I don't.”

Tyto squirms a bit, then asks in a small voice, “Are they dating?”

“Yeah.”

“Because…if I didn’t know better, I’d say he was acting sort of…” He hesitates, wrapping his arms around himself. “Never mind, it’s not my place.”

“Tyto, you don’t have to be afraid of talking to me.”

Tyto bites his lip, then finally says, “Jealous. He seemed jealous.”

Revali immediately wants to refute that, but thinking back on it, Tyto is right. He frowns, processing. Why would Link be jealous? Is he thinking that if Revali starts dating someone that he won’t have time for Link anymore or something?

“I’m really sorry,” Revali finally says. “I don’t know what his issue is, but I’m really unhappy that it affected you. You don't deserve that.”

“Maybe,” Tyto says quietly, looking up at Revali steadily, “You could make it up to me?”

Revali stares at him, and Tyto hides his face. “I’m sorry, that sort of just came out.”

Revali takes his hands off his face, then kisses him gently, just once. “Like that?” he asks lowly, then turns pink. He can’t believe he just did that.

“U-u-um. Yes. That works,” Tyto stutters, looking utterly charmed and beautiful in the moonlight.

They exchange goodbyes, then, both still a delicate pink, and Revali goes home and presses his hands to his lips.

Yes, he thinks. I can do this.

He falls asleep like that, hand on his mouth and a smile on his face.




His phone rings.

He half-wakes up. “What,” he groans.

“Revali, you need to get over here,” comes Zelda’s voice. She sounds very somber. “I think Sidon broke up with Link.”

Revali’s eyes widen, and he says, “I’ll be there in like fifteen minutes.”

He rushes to get himself looking somewhat presentable, then drives to their apartment. Zelda answers the door. “He got a hold of some alcohol,” she says. “It’s pretty bad.”

He walks into Link’s room, stepping quietly. “Link?”

“He,” Link hiccups as he signs, “He’s gone.”

“Sidon?” Revali moves to sit by Link, rubbing his back.

“He said something about—I needed to sort some things out for myself, and, like—he didn’t deserve having to wait for me to realize I wasn’t in love with him.” There’s a teary chuckle, then he signs sloppily, “I don’t even know what that means!”

“Me either,” Revali says slowly. “But come on. He’s just a jerk, okay? He doesn’t deserve your tears.”

“He said he loved me,” Link signs. “He said he loved me but. There’s not supposed to be a but, right? He’s just supposed to love me.”

“Yeah. Like I said, he’s a jerk.”

Link opts not to respond, instead asking, “You won’t leave me, right?”

“Of course not,” Revali says reassuringly.

“Because,” Link signs, inching closer, “You’re in love with me, too.”

Revali’s heart freezes, and he presses his lips together, looking away.

“No,” Link signs, face crumbling. “Look at me. Look at me, please.”

And then he kisses him.

It’s sloppy, and it only lasts a moment before Revali breaks away with a broken gasp.

“Revali? Don’t you love me?” His eyes are luminous, and Revali can’t do this.

Revali just shakes his head wordlessly and runs out.

“Revali, what happened?” Zelda asks worriedly.

He doesn’t say anything, just stumbles through the door, and his chest is both pained and numb at the same time somehow.

He gets to his car, parked on the street, before he allows himself to cry.

Notes:

LINK, NO

i've given up on making any of this in character by now ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Chapter 12

Notes:

cw: drunkenness mention

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

He doesn’t know where to turn. He can’t talk to Sidon, or to Link, and those are his only friends. He can’t talk to Tyto, either.

Oh, no, Tyto.

How does he tell him? How do you say “my best friend, who I am in love with, got sloppy drunk and kissed me and now I don’t know how to deal with anything because I thought I could get over him and be with you but now I’m not so sure?”

The numbness fades and is replaced with fury. How could Link do this? How could he be so unfair, so utterly cruel, as to use Revali’s feelings against him? What kind of person does that?

He manages to drive home, but he doesn’t sleep. He doesn’t think he can. He goes into the kitchen, but all of a sudden the batter isn’t mixing and the dough isn’t rising and nothing is working and he can’t do any of this, not a single thing.

The first text he gets in the morning is from Tyto, a cheerful message about what he had for breakfast, which only makes him feel even more awful. The second he gets is from Sidon, a short note that just says, “We broke up.”

The last, at a late hour that indicates a hangover, is from Link.

“Revali, I am so sorry.”

He never uses capitals when he texts, which means he’s probably sincere and feeling ashamed right now, which is not nearly as much as what he deserves.

“Don’t you dare talk to me ever again,” Revali responds, jabbing the letters on his phone like it will convey his anger better, then turns his phone off. When he finally turns it back on after a day of frustrated baking, he has a worried message from Tyto and about thirty messages from Link, which he doesn’t bother looking at. He just deletes the conversation.

He does say something to Tyto, though. “Tyto, I’m sorry I didn’t respond. I had the worst day.”

“Want to talk about it?” comes the response about ten minutes later.

“I don’t know if I can right now”

“That’s okay. But you should probably talk to someone at some point.”

“I don’t have anyone who I can tell” he types despondently, despair rising in him. “If I told you I would only hurt you and I can’t bear that”

“I appreciate that, I really do, but I might be stronger than you’re giving me credit for, you know.”

To heck with it. He’s going to have to tell him sometime. “Link got drunk and kissed me”

There’s a long pause, then, “Where do you live?”

Revali isn’t expecting that. “Pretty near the bakery,” he responds, confused. “Why”

“I can get there in a half hour. Just say the word.”

“Tyto, I can’t ask that of you.”

“It sounds like you need a listening ear, and I can be that for you. I want to be that for you. Let me?”

And he knows this will only end in ruin and heartbreak for everyone, but he’s so tired, and he hurts so much, and he sends Tyto his address.

Tyto rings his doorbell about thirty-five minutes later, expression inscrutable. Then he steps forward and hugs Revali.

Revali sinks into the contact, and Tyto doesn’t make to move away until Revali does.

“I’m so sorry,” Revali says despondently, trying not to start crying again. “I’m so, so sorry.”

“You don’t need to be sorry,” Tyto says, leading him to the couch. “You didn’t initiate anything, right?”

“No, but it’s still my fault.”

“How so?”

“Sidon broke up with him, and he got drunk, and his roommate asked me to help. He knows,” Revali takes a deep breath. “He knows I am—was—in love with him.”

Tyto nods slowly. “So, what, he took advantage of that?”

“I guess so. I don’t really know what was going through his mind.”

“That,” he says, surprisingly calmly, “Is one of the douchiest things I’ve heard in a while.” Seeing Revali’s expression fall, he clarifies, “On his part.”

When Revali doesn’t say anything, he continues, “It was so unbelievably wrong of him to use your feelings against you, and I’m so sorry that it happened, but it’s not your fault. As someone wise told me,” he says with a small smile, poking Revali’s shoulder, “You can blame yourself for your feelings if you want, but where will it get you?”

“You’re being way too nice about this,” Revali says disbelievingly. “Are you, perhaps, canonized?”

“I’m not dead yet, but we’ll see,” Tyto jokes, then turns sober. “Look, do you still have feelings for him?”

Revali pauses and gives a small nod.

“So then. If you want to give it a try with me, and you’re truly going to give it your best effort, then I’m okay with that. But if you think that I’ll be a replacement for him, we should probably just agree right now that things aren’t going to work out, no hard feelings, before either of us get in too deep. I like you, a lot, but I deserve to be someone’s first choice.”

“Of course you do, Tyto. You’re so good.”

Tyto smiles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “Please don’t give me the ‘anyone would be lucky to have you’ speech, Revali.”

“I wasn’t going to.” Revali bites his lip, then says carefully, “I was just going to say that you’re too good for it to be fair that I would think of anyone other than you while we’re together, and I don’t know what the future will hold, but I don’t think I can guarantee that.”

Tyto looks down. “Yeah, I sort of expected that,” he says softly.

“I’m so sorry.”

“You’re not the only one who’s gotten into relationships where they knew they couldn’t reciprocate,” Tyto reminds him with a melancholy smile. “At least this time there’s not a kid involved.”

Revali hangs his head. “But still.”

“Revali, it’s all right, truly. We’ll both hurt for a while and then we’ll move forward. That’s how these things work. Everyone’s wrong until one person is right, yeah?”

“I did want to be right for you,” Revali whispers, shutting his eyes. “I really did.”

Revali feels a set of dry lips on his cheek, and when he opens his eyes, Tyto is smiling for real this time. “Thank you. You’re good too, even if you don’t believe it.”

Then, he gets up and leaves, as quietly and as quickly as he came into Revali’s life.

Notes:

tyto the world is not good enough for you ;A;

dw just because revali knows that he still has feelings for link does NOT mean he's going to forgive him anytime soon

Chapter 13

Notes:

cw: food

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

When Revali heads to the bakery on Monday morning to open up, he finds Link sitting outside, looking miserable. When Revali gets closer, he stands.

“Revali—”

“Asking you to never talk to me again and deleting all of your texts without reading them is not an invitation to stalk me at my workplace,” Revali hisses. “Go away.”

“But—”

“This is not a situation you can argue or apologize your way out of, Link!” Revali shouts, and Link shrinks back. “If I were to ever decide to forgive you for some unknown reason, it would be on my own time, and certainly not because of anything you did.”

“Can you just let me apologize properly, even if it doesn’t change anything?” Link signs desperately. Revali distantly notices that he looks kind of awful. He has dark bags under his eyes, and his hair is unkempt.

“What, so that you can feel a bit better about yourself? No. I want you to feel even a fraction as bad as I feel right now, as I felt when I had to watch Tyto leave, as I felt when you kissed me without my consent—”

“Tyto left?”

Revali demands, “That’s what you got from that?! Yeah, he did, and it’s at least in part your fault, so I reiterate, go away.”

Link looks on the verge of tears. “Is there nothing I can do?”

“You can leave me alone.” He unlocks the door to the bakery and storms inside, leaving Link looking in helplessly.




On Wednesday, Leuco asks, “Where’s Link?”

“He had better not come,” Revali growls.

“Oh. Wow. So it’s bad this time.” He pauses. “And Tyto?”

Revali deflates. “He’s not going to be coming anymore either.”

“I’m sorry, man,” Leuco says, and for once he sounds genuine. “That sucks.”

Revali sighs, looking away. “Yeah.”

The door jingles, and when Revali looks up, it’s Zelda. He scowls.

“If you’re coming to apologize for him—” Revali begins.

She holds up her hand. “I’m not, I promise. I just want to know what happened. All Link will say is that it was his fault.”

Revali raises an eyebrow. “Sorry, but what makes you think it’s any of your business?”

“Because you’re my friend?” she shoots back irritably. “Because I’m concerned for your well-being, you jerk, and I want to know if I can help?”

“You can’t.” Revali taps a pattern on his hip, then says abruptly, “He kissed me.”

Leuco makes a strangled noise, and Zelda gasps. “What?”

“He told me that I would never leave him because I was in love with him, and then he kissed me, and I left. So that’s what happened.”

“That dick,” Zelda says, sounding almost as enraged as Revali feels.

“Wait, why isn’t this a happy thing?” Leuco asks bemusedly.

“Because I’m in love with him, and he treated me like—some disposable rebound, just a tool to help him get over Sidon! Because I was finally starting to get over him, and he just drew me back in and used me and my feelings like they meant nothing! Why on earth would I be happy about that, Leuco, you insensitive douche?!”

Leuco winces. “That’s fair. Sorry.”

“Should I hit him?” Zelda asks. “I am happy to hit him.”

Revali sighs. “He probably already feels bad enough without corporal punishment,” he admits grudgingly.

“I’m going to hit him anyway,” Zelda declares cheerfully. “He may not need to feel worse, but it’ll make me feel better.”

“I’m not going to stop you,” Revali says dryly.

“Anyway, I’m sorry he did that to you,” she says, sobering. “Don’t forgive him anytime soon, okay?”

Revali snorts. “I won’t, believe me.”

“Good.” She nods decisively. “Now give me a cookie, please.”

“Everybody only loves me because I give them food,” Revali bemoans.

“Not only,” Zelda says softly, resting her hand on his shoulder, then retracts it and says brightly, “But it doesn’t hurt, either!”

He huffs and gives her her cookie.




Sidon comes in on Friday as per usual, without Mipha—she must be busy—and with Zelda. Honestly, Revali is slightly surprised Sidon is here. He hasn’t been texting Revali, so he figured something was up.

Sidon looks around. “I guess Link wouldn’t want to come, huh,” he mutters, sounding almost melancholy. He doesn’t look too good either.

“He’s not allowed to come,” Zelda corrects.

“What? Why?”

Zelda blinks, then leans over and whispers something to him.

“What?!” Sidon exclaims, standing up and nearly knocking over the small table.

Zelda rolls her eyes and mutters, “I don’t know why I bothered whispering anyway.”

“I don’t understand,” Sidon says, regaining control of himself. “If he finally realizes, and Revali knows, why is he disallowed from coming here?”

“Realizes what?”

“That he’s in love with Revali, of course,” Sidon says confusedly, and Zelda splutters.

“I beg your pardon?”

“That’s why I broke up with him in the first place,” Sidon says. “After our disastrous double date—”

“Wait, wait, I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Zelda interrupts. “I haven’t heard any of this.”

“We encountered Revali and Tyto out together at a restaurant, and Link didn’t react well. It was pretty clear he was very jealous, and I knew that while he probably didn’t know it himself, he had some buried feelings for Revali. I told him he needed to sort it out and ended things.” He tilts his head. “I didn’t expect he’d sort it out so quickly, though.”

“I don’t think he has,” Zelda says slowly. “He was pretty drunk, and Revali just said that he talked about how Revali couldn’t leave him because he was in love with him. I guess I don’t know what Link is thinking, but Revali definitely thinks that Link was using him to get over you.”

“Oh.” Sidon’s face falls. “I can see why Revali is mad, then.”

“Yeah. Do you really think Link loves Revali?”

“I can’t think of a better explanation,” Sidon says with a shrug.

“Interesting,” Zelda says, and in her eyes Sidon sees the beginnings of a plot. “Very interesting.”

“You frighten me sometimes,” Sidon says mildly.

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” Zelda says.

Obviously, she’ll have to get them together. But they have to make up first.

Notes:

next chapter: zelda interrogates link and underestimates revali's ability to hold a grudge

Chapter 14

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The problem is, Zelda has vastly underestimated how long Revali can hold a grudge. She thought perhaps two weeks, maybe three, and Revali would finally let Link apologize.

It’s been a month and a half, and while Revali isn’t precisely angry anymore, he’s also far too stubborn to be the first one to let Link know that he misses him. Link, on the other hand, is much too ashamed and depressed to make the first move himself, so they’re left in a kind of limbo.

Zelda, frankly, is sick of it.

She’s sick of seeing them both always in a bad mood, always wanting something they think they can’t have.

She thinks back to the night after Sidon told her about his theory. She had walked right into Link’s room and asked bluntly, “How do you feel about Revali?”

He had raised an eyebrow at her and signed, “I did ask you to knock.”

“And every time you ask, I ignore you. How do you feel about Revali?”

“Do you really need to ask?”

“Yes. How do you f—”

“Fine. Sad, depressed, ashamed, I pretty much hate myself, is that what you wanted to hear?” he signs sharply.

“No, not that,” she says, waving her hand dismissively. “Like, without all of the drama, what are your feelings for him?”

Link blinks, confused. “He’s probably my best friend besides you?”

“I see. Thanks!” she chirps, and walks back out of the room.

So he hasn’t realized yet. She has a lot of work to do.

But, despite telling Revali to take his time, he’s taking far too much time, and they’re both moping and it’s awful, so she decides to take action.

“come quickly to apt need help” she texts in the evening, foregoing her usual flawless grammar.

“What?? Are you okay??”

“just come dw link is at a class”

He’s not, but that’s sort of the point.

Revali arrives fifteen minutes later, looking slightly panicky. She almost feels bad, but not really. “What’s wrong?”

“What’s wrong,” she says cheerfully, pushing him towards Link’s room, “Is that you’re both entirely too stubborn.” Then she opens the door and shoves him in. “In you go!” Then, because Link’s door doesn’t lock, she sits in front of the door.

“I hate you,” Revali hisses through the place where the door doesn’t quite meet its frame.

“I don’t really care,” she responds. “Anyway, I’ll let you out once you’ve worked things out, but no sooner.”

Revali looks at the bed, where Link is sleeping. He still looks pretty awful, but underneath the sallow skin and dark circles, he’s still the beautiful boy Revali fell in love with.

So, of course, he kicks the bed and says gruffly, “Wake up so we can get this over with.”

Link wakes up with a start, and his eyes go wide. “Revali?”

“Zelda locked me in here,” he says by way of explanation.

Link closes his eyes, a pained expression on his face. “I’m sorry.”

“This one isn’t your fault.”

There’s an awkward silence, then Link signs, “It’s good to see your face.”

“I might consider saying the same, but you look like crap.”

Link huffs. “I haven’t been doing so well.”

“Yeah, I know.” Revali stares at him steadily. “So, what, are you going to apologize again?”

There’s a spark of hope in Link’s eyes. “Are you going to let me?”

“I don’t think she’ll let us out unless I do.”

The spark winks out of his eyes, and he coughs. “Oh. Right.”

Revali waits impatiently, until Link finally signs, “I’ve been trying to think of what to say to you ever since that night, but I don’t really think any of my words will be sufficient to communicate to you exactly how sorry I am for what I did to you. I was drunk, and scared, and sad, but none of that excuses my behavior.”

“Scared?” Revali inquires.

Link sighs. “I…when I saw you with Tyto, all I could think of is that you’d love him and leave me. That thought was…paralyzing, for some reason. I couldn’t bear to think of you not being by my side. So when I saw you that night, when Sidon had just left me, all I could think was that I needed you, and that I needed you not to leave me either, that I needed you to somehow be as wrapped up in me as I was in you.” He looks down at his lap. “Obviously that backfired.”

No it didn’t, he wants to say. I wish it had.

“I could spend the rest of my life trying to make it up to you and still not get there, and I don’t have any right to ask for your forgiveness, but…I do miss you, so a part of me hopes you’ll give it to me anyway.” He shrugs shyly. “So that’s all I wanted to say, I guess.”

“If I forgive you,” Revali eventually says, “I would like to make it clear that it would not be because you deserve it, but because I am an incredibly merciful being.”

A hint of a smile plays at the corner of Link’s lips, and he signs, “Noted.”

“And you would have to never do something like that again. I don’t…I don’t deserve that.”

“Of course not, Revali. You deserve…” He hesitates, then signs, “You deserve so much more than I am able to give you.”

“Don’t be hyperbolic. But…” Revali takes a breath, then walks closer to Link. “I’ve missed you too.”

“Really?” Link asks, the hopeful look back in his eyes.

“Of course. You’re my friend, Link.” He pauses. “Even if you’re horrible, and even if I’m still convinced that one day you’re going to use one of these creepy ceremonial daggers to sacrifice me to a dark and unknown god.”

“He can’t very well be unknown if I’m going to be sacrificing you to him,” Link signs reasonably. Then his expression turns vulnerable. “But…we’re still friends?”

“I think it’ll take some time for me to trust you again,” Revali says. “But I also don’t think I’m ever going to really be able to let go of you.”

Link’s face slowly brightens.

“So, yeah. Still friends.”

Link makes a movement, almost like he’s going to leap up from the bed and hug Revali, but instead he just signs, eyes starting to go watery, “Thank you. Thank you so much.”

Revali leans down and gives him a hug anyway, because he knows Link hates it when Revali sees him cry, but also just because he wants to.

They have a lot of hugs to make up for, after all.

Notes:

please note the updated chapter count! this should be ending in two chapters, probably, unless i find a way to make it into three

Chapter 15

Notes:

cw: food, secondhand embarrassment

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

That Friday, Link shows up at the bakery with a hesitant wave. He and Sidon stare at one another for a while, then Sidon says with a pained smile, “Good to see you again, Link.”

“Good to see you too, Sidon,” Link signs, looking equally sad.

“Cookie time,” Revali interjects, coming by to drop off a plate of chocolate chip cookies. “Stop being depressing.”

“Are you kidding?” Zelda demands. “You’ve been the most depressing one of all of us.”

“I had the right,” Revali says primly. “And I also have the right to kick you all out of here, so you have to do as I say, and I say stop being depressing. Now eat your cookies.”

He walks back to the counter, and Mipha inquires, “Does this mean we’re all friends again now? Because I’m awfully tired of walking on eggshells.”

“Can I give that a hard second?” Zelda asks dryly.

“I think we can get there,” Sidon says softly, and this time the smiles he and Link exchange are more genuine.

It takes a while for them to all be as comfortable around each other as they were before. Sometimes Sidon will lean into Link and then jerk away as he remembers, or Revali will get in a pissy mood and refuse to talk to Link for the entire day. Throughout all of it, Zelda bides her time.

Then, she makes her move.

“Sidon.” she texts Sidon one day. “I need your help with something.”

“What is it?”

“You know how Link is an oblivious dork?”

“Uh, yeah…?”

“Well, I have a plan to help him realize his feelings for Revali, but it requires you do a little something for me…”

A couple of days later, Sidon calls Revali while he’s at the bakery, which is a rarity for him. “Revali,” he says desperately. “I really need a huge favor.”

Revali stirs the batter he’s working on. “Like what kind of huge favor?”

“Like, I accidentally double-booked myself for a modeling job?”

Revali immediately scowls. “No.”

“Revali, please! I’ll probably get fired by the university if I don’t send in a replacement, and I need this job. I’ll give you my pay for it and everything, and all you have to do is hold a couple of poses!”

“Naked, Sidon!”

“What, do you have something to be ashamed of?” Sidon jokes.

“I’m ashamed you’re my friend,” he says irritably.

“Please, Revali, I’ll never ask you for anything again.”

“…Fine. But you owe me so much, and also I hate you for asking this.”

“That’s fair,” Sidon concedes. “Thank you so much, you’re really saving me.”

He gives him the details—it’s at the local college at 4PM the next day. He needs to wear easy-to-remove clothes, and he needs to bring a bathrobe. Revali hangs up after that.

(Not that he doesn’t have a bathrobe. It’s dark blue, and very fluffy. But Sidon doesn’t need to know that.)

He walks to the room on campus next day with his heart in his throat. He’s never done anything like this before—and, obviously, will never do something like this again—and he’s incredibly nervous.

So then, of course, he walks into the correct room, and Link is blinking up at him, adorably confused. “Revali?” he signs. “What are you doing here?”

Revali doesn’t respond, too busy screaming internally. He just pulls out his phone and texts Sidon, “I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you”

“It was Zelda’s idea! And I really did double-book myself, so you can’t get out of it! See you ;)”

“You’re Sidon’s replacement, right?” the teacher asks.

Revali, starting to flush red at the realization that he’ll be stripping in front of Link, nods weakly.

“All right. He told me you’ve never done this before, so here’s how it goes. We start off with a few five-minute poses, then ten, then move into two thirty-minutes, and then into an hour. If you wouldn’t mind taking your clothes off?”

Link, who it appears has just caught on, makes a small squeaking noise and turns the same shade of red as Revali.

Revali decides he hates life, and despite what his grandpa had said, that there are no good things about it. He takes off his clothes and climbs onto the platform.

“Link?” the teacher asks amusedly. “You do need to look at him to draw him, you know.”

Luckily, Revali doesn’t need to look at Link to pose, and he takes full advantage of that fact. The teacher has him rotate around the platform so that everyone has different angles for different poses, and at one point he’s facing Link full-on. The noise that Link makes at that point is more of a helpless squawk. That’s the hour-long pose, for the record, because life is terrible.

At the end of the class, after everyone is done drawing and packing up, Revali puts on his clothes and powerwalks away. Link doesn’t try and catch up with him, for which he is grateful.

He texts Zelda as he walks. “I hate you too”

“No, you don’t,” she texts back smugly. “You’ll thank me later.”

Then she texts Link. “Have fun today? ;)”

“…was this ur fault”

“Maybe.”

“do u hate me????”

“Sure, but I did this because I love you just as much <3 Now spill, what is he hiding under that apron?”

“>:|”

“Who’s being mean now >:(”

“zelda ur gay”

“Just because I am indeed gay as the day is long doesn’t mean I can’t be curious.”

“ugh”

Then, a minute later, “fine i’ll show u my drawings when i get home”

“Yessss.”

After he gets home, eats, and changes into shorts, he opens up his sketchpad and stares at one of the poses thoughtfully. It’s Revali, three-quarters turned away from him, hand stretched towards someone.

He bites his lip and flips towards the one where Revali had been facing towards him, in which he had ended up focusing on drawing his face.

He had been blushing, but his face was still proud. He traces the outlines in the air above the drawing, being careful not to smudge the charcoal. A strong nose, a set brow, lips in a hard line but soft all the same. (He remembers that. He hates himself for remembering.) He looks like he’s facing off against the world.

Link wants to be there right next to him, at his side, so that he doesn’t have to look so very alone.

The thought startles him. I’ve always tried to be by his side, he reminds himself, as his friend.

But that’s not quite what you meant, is it? something in his head asks quietly.

No, he says thoughtfully, no, it's not.

Notes:

the modeling thing was the second ever scene i thought of for this fic after thinking of the premise and that it was originally going to be in like chapter six lol

next chapter: it all ends

Chapter 16

Notes:

cw: food

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

The realization comes to him slowly, in Revali’s blush and his smile and his ridiculous ever-present blue scarf. It comes to him in Wednesdays spent cooking and Fridays with chocolate chip cookies and every day spent texting no one but him. It comes to him in jealousy and in forgiveness and in the shape of his face on the page, and all of a sudden Link thinks, I love him, don’t I.

He’s so wrapped up in his thoughts that he doesn’t realize Zelda sitting next to him and peeking over his shoulder at the illustration until she whistles. “Dang. Still gay, but he’s hot.”

“Yes,” Link signs absentmindedly, because that realization came fast, in the form of, wouldn’t it be nice to do this again with fewer prying eyes, just me and you and a sketchpad and pencil and then maybe lose the last two—

He sobers at that thought. He shouldn’t be thinking about Revali that way when they’re not together and won’t ever be. He knows that. He knows that, because…

Zelda, on the other hand, is grinning, her eyes devious. Step 1: Physical Attraction is clearly in the bag, which means it’s time to move onto—

“I think I’m going to turn in early tonight,” Link signs, his face distant.

Zelda frowns. “Are you all right?”

“Yeah. Just…thinking.”

She watches him go, still frowning, until Link closes his door.

He knows they won’t ever be together, because Revali doesn’t love him anymore, and it’s his fault.

Because if Revali still loved him, he wouldn’t have gone out with Tyto, he wouldn’t have kissed him. He wouldn’t have looked like the world was ending when Link kissed him, trying to erase Tyto from his lips, trying to fill Revali’s world with only him, and—

Link pauses. He thinks he’s starting to realize why Sidon broke up with him, and the thing he was supposed to ‘sort out’.

Exhaling, he texts Sidon, “i’m sorry”

“Huh? For what?”

“i think i was always a little bit in love with revali”

There’s a pause, then Sidon texts back, “:) I know.”

“but please never doubt for a moment that i loved you too”

“I don’t. I assure you that I loved you then as well, and always will, albeit in a different way.”

“<3 if u were here rn i’d hug u so hard”

“I will expect one next time we meet then as recompense! But perhaps now you should go to Revali instead. He’s been waiting an awful long time.”

“? for a hug?”

“For you to reciprocate his feelings.”

“…he doesn’t like me like that anymore, i don’t think”

“I don’t know where you got that impression, but it is horribly mistaken. That boy is as head over heels for you as he was on day one. More, even.”

“but? he started dating another person and got so mad when i kissed him? i’m p sure you’re wrong”

“He started dating another person to get over you and broke up with them when he found he couldn’t. And he got mad because he thought you were using him to get over me. So, I’m right, thanks, as always :P”

“…”

“I have the text receipts to prove it, if you need them.”

“no, just…ugh if you’re wrong this will be so awkward”

“But think of how wonderful it will be if I’m right! Which I am.”

“hm”

“Anyway, the point is, go to him. Otherwise I may just have to send this conversation to him, and that would be unfortunate, wouldn’t it?”

“D: take it back you don’t love me at all”

“I do, I do! But he’s my friend too, and I want you both to be happy. :P Get to it!”

He exits his room, shaking his head. Zelda looks up from the couch. “Link? Are you going somewhere?”

“I’m going to tell Revali I love him,” he signs, determined, and leaves her flabbergasted in their apartment.

Well, she thinks. Guess one step was enough, and she pats herself on the back for a job well done.

Revali doesn’t know about any of this. He’s in the kitchen, baking pretzel rolls for himself to eat and very pointedly not thinking about the events of earlier that day, because every time he does he feels like hiding in his bed. He’s actually kind of a mess—there’s flour all over him, and he’s got dough on his hands. It’s not like anyone is going to see him like this, though.

So then, obviously, the doorbell rings.

He carefully opens the door handle with his elbow and peeks outside, coloring when he sees Link. “Oh. Um…hey.”

“Can I come in?” Link signs, looking anxious and amused and fond all at once.

“Sure, of course.”

Link enters, then gives him a head-to-toe onceover, which would be far less awkward if he hadn’t seen him naked earlier that day.

“Oh, I’m making pretzel rolls,” Revali says by way of explanation. “We can talk while I get them in the oven?”

Link nods, following him silently into the kitchen.

Revali starts to parcel out the dough for the rolls, then looks up. “So, if you want to talk about what happened, it’s not my fault. It’s Sidon and Zelda’s fault, and they hate me and I hate them, so.”

Link smiles. “That’s not what I wanted to talk about, not exactly.” He bites his lip. “Sidon said…that the reason you got mad when I kissed you was because you thought I was using you.”

Revali stops in his movements—he’s forming the dough into balls—then says dangerously, “Why did you think I was mad?”

“I thought you were mad because you didn’t love me anymore and you were dating someone else.”

“Can we not talk about this?” Revali asks, calmly squeezing the life out of a ball of dough.

“I think we need to.” Link takes a deep breath. “Do you still love me?”

“Please don’t ask me that question,” Revali says, a hint of desperation in his voice.

“I need to know.”

“Why? Why would you need to know? What could possibly be making you bring this up, after I’ve finally—”

“Because I love you,” Link signs, squeezing his eyes shut, “And I need to know if you’re still willing to give me a chance.”

Revali blinks.

“I think,” he says finally, “That I just completely forgot all of the sign language I ever knew, because the thing I thought you said is not a thing you possibly could ever have said.”

Link makes a frustrated noise, then signs, “I would kiss you to show I’m serious, but I’m not going to do that unless I have your explicit permission. I learned my lesson.”

“I…okay, maybe I say out loud what I thought I just saw and then you nod if I’m right and laugh in my face if I’m wrong?”

Link sighs, but nods.

“So, you…love me.”

Link gives a small nod.

“You want to kiss me.”

Link nods again, blushing.

“You saw me naked today, and now you’re in love with me?” Revali asks incredulously. “Is this just a thing for you, because if I recall that’s how it worked with Sidon as well, and—”

“Can you just tell me if you feel the same?” Link bursts out, his signs sharp and irritated. “Yes, I love you, and yes I want to kiss you, but holy crap, sometimes you’re the worst—”

“I don’t know if I believe you,” Revali says quietly, moving around the counter. “I don’t know how I can. I don’t know if I could wake up from this and have it not be real. But if this is a dream anyway, then I guess it won’t hurt to tell you that I’ve never stopped loving you, not once.”

Link slowly starts to grin. “You’re not dreaming, and I’d very much like to kiss you right now. May I?”

“Oh, what the heck,” Revali mumbles, and leans down to press his lips against Link’s.

And then Link is kissing back, and Revali doesn’t know where to put his hands so he just puts them on Link’s shoulders, and all the dough on his hands gets on Link’s shirt, and Revali pulls back and apologizes, and Link smiles and offers to take it off, because it’s only fair that Revali get to see him shirtless when Link has seen all of him, and Revali squawks and jumps away, but Link follows him, laughing sweetly, and it’s only when they’ve both lost count of how many kisses they’ve exchanged that Revali finally admits that this might not be a dream after all.

So that’s how that goes.



Zelda is pleased, but wants details. Sidon congratulates them both enthusiastically, as does Mipha. Leuco winks and says, “Told you I’m always right in the end,” and Revali scowls at him, but he also makes lemon bars the day after.

Tyto comes in a while later, beaming, with an engagement ring and a request to make a cake for an upcoming wedding. His name is Rami, he tells Revali, and Tyto has always been his first choice. Revali hugs him and wishes him happiness, and he makes the biggest and most extravagant cake he can muster, and Athene compliments him again because it is pretty and tastes good.

And Link? Link loves him, and he loves Link, and Revali didn’t believe in love before, but Link has a way of making him think that he might have been wrong all along.

For once, he doesn’t really mind.

Notes:

the ending on this is really rushed but i didn't know how to fix it so this is what u get =v=

oh also Rami is of course...the desert owl, strix hadorami

anyway, thank you all for reading this silly story! it kind of got away from me, honestly, i wasn't expecting it to be longer than ten chapters at most and yet here we are. but i'm so happy i got to share this with all you and i really appreciate all of you letting me do so!

as always, i take requests on my tumblr, so if you want any more scenes from this particular au or any other thing then ask me and i'll probably write it *v* onto the next thing! i hope to see you all again sometime, and best wishes!

Notes:

thank you for reading, i love you all! my tumblr is here!