Sufficiently wined and dined, Father Adam Gagnon and his new companion stumbled home to Adam’s flat together and up the stairs, playfully pushing and grabbing at one another’s hips and shoulders and asses up to the top floor.
Once inside, breathless, young Luci seemed to straighten up and take stock of his surroundings. He turned this way and that, looking at the old armchair, the lonely bachelor’s breakfast table, the worn leather sofa while Adam began monologuing the benefit of living alone as far as his job was concerned. Luci, peeking shamelessly into the liquor cabinet, touching the top of a Playboy mag daintily, didn’t seem to give a single shit. He all but turned his back to Adam as he examined Adam’s vinyl collection in earnest and Adam fell silent, meditating on Luci’s need to sleep and feel safe and get up in the morning to catch his train rather than the fullness of his ass as he bent over to read the worn spine of an album. That wasn’t the reason Adam had invited him to dinner when he’d seen him sitting on that uncovered bus bench in the rain. He was simply a man- a priest for Christsakes!- performing an overdue Good Deed for an outsider to his parish.
This thought dropped from his mind as quickly as Luci dropped his rain dampened hoodie from his shoulders to the floor and followed that up quickly with his shirt. “I like your collection; I’d like to be fucked to it…”
Arching a shoulder, Luci turned his head to look back at Adam, laughing when he saw Adam’s slack expression.
“Oh, like this isn’t where this was headed the whole night!”
“It wasn’t!” Adam said, face drained of color.
Smiling, he turned towards Adam, fingers effortlessly popping open the button to his pants, hooking on the zipper and teasing it down. “The clothes can go back on…”
It was Adam’s turn to smile, though he did lay a steadying hand on the armchair as he watched the downward crawl of the young man’s finger. “I didn’t say that … Just that this wasn’t what I was angling for at all.”
“Isn’t it customary after being wined and dined…?” Luci’s eyes locked on Adam’s and he began to slink across the room slowly, rooting Adam to the spot with his startling eyes like a snake of lore.
“I don’t make a habit of…”
Adam fell silent as Luci came to a stop in front of him, their lips a breath apart and Luci’s little belly practically brushing against his own. Hands sliding showily to his hips, head tilted to the side, Luci’s voice was a whisper made from the edges of crystals, challenging him. “Are you telling me you don’t have room for dessert?”
“Sugar,” Adam purred, cupping Luci's cheek and brushing a thumb over Luci's heart-shaped lips, testing their plushness before experimentally sinking his thumb into the wet darkness beyond. Pushing his thumb against the warm pad of Luci's split tongue, he began to fuck his mouth slowly, watching Luci watch him as he obediently sucked. Those bright pink eyes stared out at him like jewels set in absolute darkness, Luci's lashes like lace, somehow failing to soften the intensity of his stare. Pulling his thumb free with a wet popping noise, Adam rewarded the young man by petting the soft skin under his chin. That managed to soften Luci's stare, his pink lips swollen and wet. Adam’s cock stirred hungrily. “Never underestimate my appetite when it comes to sweets.”
Sliding his hand around the back of Luci’s head, Adam pulled him to him, crushing their lips together, pleased when Luci’s arms slipped over his shoulders. That young body, leaning up to meet him, soft and warm. Closing his eyes, Adam felt about twenty again, the fireworks sparking in his head as the tips of Luci’s two-headed tongue explored him. Unable to restrain himself, his other hand travelled down Luci’s side, fingers raking the girlish slope of his hip. There was a small grunt somewhere in their combined mouth and they both broke for air together, blinking at one another, coming back to themselves.
Adam was the first to recover and as Luci arched his body against him, he slid his hands down past the barrier of Luci’s pants and over the silken skin of his plump ass, pleasantly surprised to find panties underneath everything as he pushed his pants down. Luci’s hands were at his waist, untucking his shirt and undoing his belt. Before Adam knew what was happening, Luci had fallen to his knees and pulled him free, taking him deep past those silver and pearlescent teeth and down his throat.
“Fuck!” Adam fisted at Luci’s hair with both hands and only received a muffled giggle in response before he began fucking Luci’s mouth in earnest. The boy took it like a champ, his split tongue doing wonders as he traced veins and swirled around him with a double-touch like phantom fingers. Shivering, Adam was afraid he’d come in Luci’s mouth then and there so he shoved him away, only to yelp and stagger back as Luci wriggled halfway out of his pants and launched himself up from the floor teeth-first at his throat. Luci bit him, but gently, playfully teething at the flesh just above his collar before his bite went lower and he came away with Adam’s tab collar between his teeth, obviously very pleased with himself.
“Such a bad boy,” Adam cooed, grabbing Luci’s jaw. Luci spat the collar out at him and laughed, leaning forward again to unbutton Adam’s shirt at the same time Adam was stepping back out of his own pants and they fell to the floor together in a tangle of limbs, holding onto one another.
“Oh, fuck, are you okay?” Luci gazed down at the priest underneath him, winded, relieved when Adam nodded. “Alright, let’s try this again…”
Adam watched, a bit dazed as Luci sat up and made a little show of pulling his panties down so that his pretty pink cock sprang free between them. Winking, Luci sucked on two fingers before pressing them up inside of himself one at a time with a practiced motion. His body tensed and shuddered each time and his eyes fluttered closed as he worked on stretching himself open. Mouth dry, Adam watched his body rock back and forth on his fingers, allowing his own touch to stray up Luci’s thighs, practically aching to be inside of him.
“May I?” Luci asked, gesturing to Adam’s lonely cock, and before Adam really knew what he was inviting Luci to do, he was sheathed inside Luci and the beautiful young man was sighing and taking deep breaths as he adjusted to Adam’s girth. Dumbly, mind short-circuiting with pleasure, Adam scratched Luci’s hip in encouragement, loving the soft little sounds Luci continued to make as he grew accustomed to Adam’s width.
He let Luci lean down over him and unbutton his shirt, blinking. Slowly, he slid a hand down Luci’s back. He smirked as Luci pulled the fabric open and began planting little half open-mouthed kisses in a line down his sternum. Head coming back up, Luci trailed his split tongue up over Adam’s skin, tasting him. Adam gently brushed some of Luci's pale hair back and laid a hand against the column of Luci’s throat. His breath caught as Luci pressed readily into his touch and began rocking back onto Adam’s cock only to rock forward against Adam’s waiting hand, choking himself briefly each time. The sight of it: Luci’s pink lips parted, his eyelids heavy, cheeks flushed and cock swollen only encouraged Adam to squeeze Luci’s throat carefully whenever Luci rocked back towards him. A shaky breath left Luci as he sped up, riding Adam in earnest, eager to feel Adam’s long fingers wrapped around him.
Adam froze in shock and then horror as Luci stood up, Adam’s cock nearly coming out of him with a popping sound.
“Are you alright?” Adam asked, not sure if he was alright, himself. His cock, tortured and aching, leaked into the significantly cooler air. Luci had turned turned away and was bent half over giving Adam an incredible view of his ass as he inspected the shelf of records.
Luci’s reply was cheery. “Yeah! I forgot to put on some music.”
Groaning, Adam propped himself up on his elbows, biting his bottom lip as he tried to soothe his own impatience. God, Luci’s ass was plump and round- something straight out of a Playboy . He bit his own tongue to prove to himself he hadn’t fallen asleep in his armchair after one too many beers. For one thing, the Monsignor would kill him, for another this had to be the most embarrassing sex dream he’d ever had if only because it was so within the realm of possibilities it was cruel.
Tongue aching in real time, Adam watched Luci consider an album cradled in his hands..
Luci flashed him a smile, and turned the cover toward him. “Cherry Pie!”
Warrant’s Cherry Pie . Oh, no. Not wanting to assume he knew anything about the younger man, Adam raised his eyebrows, hoping his expression didn’t read as unimpressed as it felt. “You haven’t listened to that album all the way through, have you?”
“Do yourself a favor and find Holy Water , instead. Bad Company. You won’t be feeling it past the title track on Cherry Pie .”
Luci’s bottom lip jutted out preciously and Adam wanted nothing more than to squish his soft cheeks with a hand and bite at those lips until they were a bruised cherry red. Instead he gave Luci his most winning smile- a devilish thing- and arched an eyebrow. “Trust me.”
Luci put Warrant back and after a tortuous few minutes, came back up with Holy Water . There was a terrible moment where Adam wondered if Luci even knew how to handle a record properly but then the opening southern-fried riff ground out of the turntable and washed over them and Adam relaxed. A look came into Luci’s eyes and his smile shifted magically from appreciative of the soundscape to appreciative of Adam’s waiting body and he took a couple of slinking steps towards Adam in time with the guitar. Adam’s cock, wilting from rejection, stood immediately back to attention, leaking anew. It was almost embarrassing.
Running his fingers back through his hair, Luci trailed his touch lower over his pink, pert nipples and the graceful curve of his sides before falling heavily to his knees before Adam. Back arched, showing off his body proudly to the priest, Luci lowered himself onto all fours, slipping forward on his arms so his ass rose high in the air, before he began to crawl up over Adam. Mouth open, he went directly for Adam’s cock, breath hot and eager as he began to lap at the beads of precum slipping down the sides of it like drops of wax.
The sensation of Luci’s tongue wrapping two opposite ways around his shaft crushed an alarmed noise out of Adam and he managed to twist it into a laugh, crooking a finger at Luci.
“Be a good boy and sit back down on it for me.”
Dragging his belly over the sensitive head as he crawled closer, Luci pushed his face against Adam’s. A gentle growl underlined his words as he bared his metal teeth for Adam. “I don’t wanna be a good boy.”
“Of course you do,” Adam said, “For me you do.” Fingers curled along Luci’s jaw, Adam brushed his thumb along the cupid’s bow of Luci’s lips before pushing it around and against the rest of Luci’s upper lip, wanting to make the skin swell. Sweeping it down to the corner of his lips and then his bottom lip, Adam watched Luci open his mouth obediently again without being asked. He traced the edges of his miraculous teeth lightly. “Be a good boy for me and I’ll fuck you well and thoroughly.”
It was difficult to read Luci’s unnatural eyes, but he let Adam guide his hips back and line his hole up with his cock. Within moments, Adam was sheathed inside him thoroughly again and Luci closed his eyes as arousal bloomed anew in his stomach and his sweet cock curled up tightly again to meet it.
“Oh, father .” He grinned down at Adam, teeth catching the light. “Or would you prefer I call you “daddy”?”
With a wry smile, Adam gave a short experimental buck of his hips. The sudden movement caught Luci off guard and he fell forward, catching himself by planting his hands against Adam’s chest. Giggles hiccuped out of him and Adam couldn't help but reach up and stroke his cheek and hair, stomach twisting at the absolute delight on the young man’s face. “Aren't you devilish? Whatever gets your rocks off more. Now, where were we?”
Luci leaned down, brushing his lips against Adam’s chin. Smiling softly, he lifted Adam’s hands around his throat.
“Ah, yes,” Adam purred. “That's exactly where…” He watched Luci's face closely as he tightened his grip. “Is this okay?”
He tried not to laugh as Luci's eyes rolled back slightly and he bit his bottom lip, nodding. Beginning to rock his hips, Adam let Luci help direct the pace, smiling when Luci gripped onto his hips for balance. His eyes were heavenward though and Adam wanted him present. Voice soft, he called to him.
“Look at me.” Luci did and the intimacy in locking eyes was electric. It contributed spots of color to the crests of Luci's cheeks. “Gorgeous.”
Something wet and warm dripped onto his belly and he glanced down to be treated to the sight of Luci's own straining cock, crown shining with precum.
“Could you get up off of me, again? I wanna try something and keep my promise…”
Rolling his eyes but maintaining a saint’s patience, as if he hadn’t just done the same thing to Adam a minute earlier, Luci raised up off of Adam and hovered over him expectantly. Adam moved onto his knees beside him and firmly pushed at the middle of Luci’s shoulders.
“On your hands and knees.” He slapped Luci’s ass for good measure, unable to pull his hand away after, massaging and groping the plump flesh. Luci shuddered and obeyed, offering his ass up to Adam’s hands again. Eagerly slapping both hands onto Luci’s ass cheeks and gripping onto him firmly, Adam shoved inside of Luci a little roughly, testing the new position by grinding and thrusting into him several times in quick succession. Luci’s body shook with the force and Adam found he enjoyed the luxurious cushion of Luci’s ass against his bony hips. “ Good boy ,” he cooed, “Pretty as a pinup.”
He slid a thigh between Luci’s legs and spread them wider apart so that Luci had to balance his weight on his forearms, his little belly brushing the floor. Adam started the pace over, rolling his hips slowly against Luci, savoring the new comfort of their position. With Luci so low to the floor, he could lean up over him easily and he did: flicking his tongue behind Luci’s ear as he slid his hand back around the front of Luci’s throat.
“I’m gonna fuck you thoroughly, as advertised.”
In response, Luci let out a soft breath that may have been a laugh. Adam grunted, nosing the back of Luci’s head and catching his scent. Pheromones flooding his senses, Adam increased his pace, swept up in the warm softness of Luci’s young body. With his hand that wasn’t squeezing Luci’s throat, he rubbed at Luci’s ass and hip and belly, actually growling with desire at the back of Luci’s neck. The sensation of Adam’s teeth and hot breath so close to his skin made Luci shiver deliciously and Adam allowed himself to press his nails against Luci’s milk white skin, dragging them, marking him with bright pink scratches. He was rewarded when Luci pushed his gorgeous ass back against Adam’s hips, in futile retaliation. It only made Adam want him more and his hand went back to patting and slapping and groping his fleshy ass. Luci ground back against him, silently begging for more.
Grunting, Adam licked at Luci’s back and bit his shoulder experimentally. A slow exhale rolled out of Luci and he tiled his head to the side to offer more of himself.
“Good boy,” Adam growled, as Luci shuddered beneath him anew. “Damn good boy.”
Adam nuzzled his face against the back of Luci’s head, still nosing at his hair, sinking his fingernails into Luci’s soft hip.
“I’m gonna mark you.” He drawled, voice rough with exertion, “I’m gonna have you the way I want you.”
Luci moaned, the sound buzzing against Adam’s hand and Adam tilted his head and bit the back of Luci’s neck, teeth just pressing the surface of the skin. Bucking his hips wildly, Luci only pushed Adam deeper inside of himself and let out a strangled cry, pitching forward on the floorboards, his ass rising higher and pulling Adam deeper still. Despite himself, Adam sunk his teeth deeper, feeling the skin at the back of Luci’s neck break under his teeth, unwilling to let Luci slip away from him. He was so deep inside Luci that the next few rocks of Luci’s hips introduced the crown of his cock to Luci’s prostate and Luci screamed, slapping a hand against the floorboards in pain and ecstasy. His ass pushed desperately back against Adam’s hips over and over and over, only pulling worse and louder sounds from him. His breaths had grown shallow and needy and as Adam lifted his mouth away from Luci’s neck, licking his teeth, some rational part of his brain clicked on.
He rubbed his thumb against Luci’s pulse as he leaned back down to lick the few stray drops of blood from the nape of Luci’s neck, voice still gravelly with lust. Tilting his head, Adam’s lips twisted into a smirk. “Little sweetheart need to cum?”
Luci’s head bobbed minimally, hopeful, before Adam drove deep inside of him again. The force of it caused Luci to wince, body shaking with need.
“If I let go, are you going to cum?”
Shoulders and the shells of his ears pink, Luci nodded.
“If you cum, I’m still going to finish inside you. Fill you up. Pump you full. Good?”
A slight shaking of Luci’s head. Adam lowered his head, expression sternly patient as he stared at the back of Luci’s head. “So I can hear you: Good?”
“Good. Yes, good, daddy-” There was a dry gasp and Luci smashed one of his hands across his mouth, muzzling himself.
Something twisted in Adam’s chest and as he lifted his hand away from Luci’s throat, he stroked the back of Luci’s hand, loosening its hold, hoping to lessen Luci’s shame. “There you go, baby boy…"
His voice was so soft he wasn’t sure he even heard himself, but Luci did. A shiver wracked him as he sucked in a greedy breath. He shook like he’d been baptized in a full tub of ice water. Beneath them, Luci’s cock pulsated with his seed until it pooled onto the floorboards.
Knowing Luci was wrung out from his orgasm, Adam wound an arm around his waist to support him and continued pounding away, the solid slap of flesh against slick flesh almost loud enough to be sickening in the small space. He wanted Luci almost more, feeling him him so quiet and malleable beneath him.
Finding a new hold on Luci’s hip, Adam leaned up against Luci’s back again and brushed his lips against the space behind Luci’s ear. “Good boy.”
Though he couldn’t possibly be ready to go again, Luci’s lips birthed a tender moan. It was gorgeous and Adam felt his cock twitch inside Luci. There was a breath between that and another tremble in Luci’s bones and then Adam broke. Biting his bottom lip, Adam squeezed both of Luci’s hips and held him still as he emptied into him. Luci arched back up against him, gasping anew as he eagerly took every ounce.
They collapsed to the wooden floor together: sticky and heavy and hot. Neither of their limbs seem distinct: where one of them ended the other began. Luci’s skin felt golden- buzzing with the voltage of their sin. Eventually their ragged breaths fell into softer and steadier tandem. Adam was the first to lift his head. He tucked Luci’s hair back behind an ear and kissed the back of his neck.
“We just fucked on the floor,” Luci announced, voice muffled against the wood.
Snorting, Adam dropped his forehead to Luci’s shoulder. Behind them, the record played on and on. Adam pushed his nose against Luci’s skin, nuzzled into the hot smell of sex and the improbably sweet sugar scent of his skin just below it, intoxicated. He kissed and sucked at the skin, moving his attention lower to one of Luci’s shoulder blades then did the same. Luci’s arm reached back around them and he trailed his fingernails up over Adam’s ass and Adam felt himself sinking lower, drowsy. Turning his head to the side, he laid his ear against Luci’s back and his heartbeat was like a lullaby. His eyes fluttered shut.
“Can we sleep on the bed?”
Adam opened his eyes and slowly pulled himself out of Luci, carefully rolling him over onto his back. He liked the sleepy way Luci bit his lip as he gazed up at him, liked the sticky sucking noise of their combined cum as they separated. His lips quirked into a smile and he leaned over Luci, his voice a lazy drawl. “I dunno; you’re pretty dirty…”
“Thought you liked dirty boys, Father. It’s why I’m here, isn’t it?”
Yes . And no. Confusion must have passed across his face- something serious that flickered through his wolfish expression, because Luci laid both hands on his face, his touch so light. Adam turned his face into one of those palms, kissing at the pink skin, shutting his eyes against the soft pink glow of everything Luci was. Why why why? Alcohol? Was that all? Just desperate for anyone? Was he so washed up and lonely? Just another mess the Church had created by chaining him to duty and diligence?
Luci’s breath was soft against Adam’s face, and smelled like vanilla. Adam liked the way Luci’s pink eyes drifted across the starless night skies of his eyes as they traced his features, like Luci was shooting his own post-coital sex tape. Adam hoped he was trying to memorize his face for later- and realized almost immediately that was a ridiculous hope. Tomorrow, Luci would board a train and continue on his way. They only had tonight and Adam would keep whatever fragmented pieces of it that stuck around behind in him like splinters. It didn’t matter what happened after this, tomorrow, next week. But this was now, and Adam meant to make the most of it.
Luci gasped as Adam stood with him in his arms, blushing, and they both beamed at one another, the odd moment left behind on the floor.
“First…” He carried Luci to the record that was still spinning and waited for Luci to lean over to switch the player off and to lift the needle away.
“Now…” He growled softly as he pulled Luci close again, clutching tightly to him so that Luci laughed anew until their mouths crashed together, sucking and biting. With a muffled grunt, Adam found the edge of his bed and they both tumbled onto it. Adam shook the bed, bouncing up and down enough to make Luci gasp and clutch to the sheets. He was by no means ready to for another round, but smiled when Luci ground up against him eagerly, reaching between them to rub Luci’s cock, which was already stiffening anew. He nipped at the corner of Luci’s lips and gazed down into Luci’s eyes- so bright they were almost red against the blacks of his scleras.
“I love dirty boys, to answer your question, humbly being one myself.”
A pillow connected with his face and he batted it away, hands leaving Luci’s cock to clutch at his hips, rolling them over.
“Stay,” he purred, settling Luci on top of himself so Luci was straddling his hips. Reaching over to his nightstand, he flipped open a pack of cigarettes and slipped one into his mouth. He lit it with the lighter next to the pack and then laid back against the pillows, sliding a hand up the flesh of one of Luci’s thighs lazily. “I want to watch you.”
His fingers drew little circles further and further inside Luci’s thigh. Already ahead of him, Luci’s own fingers circled the crown of his cock and trailed up and down the shaft gracefully.
“I can’t believe you’re already hard again… You want it so badly.” He enjoyed watching the flush creep into Luci’s cheeks again, down his chest over over his shoulders like he’d stayed too long under the summer sun. “Move; I wanna watch. I wanna feel you…”
Luci arched a shoulder, almost shy, and began to bounce up and down on top of Adam’s hips, his perfect weight so real and warm against Adam’s own flaccid cock. He slid a hand up over Luci’s hip and over his little potbelly, fingers exploring the softness of his body, the firmness of his youthful muscle beneath, feeling just how strong he was. Despite the fact that he could have pinned Adam down and had him, Adam adored the willingness of Luci’s submission.
“Show me how much you need it…”
Luci leaned close to kiss him, planting his hands to either side of Adam’s body and dragged the tip of his cock against Adam’s stomach over and over, slicking Adam with precum.
“Good boy,” Adam purred between kisses, scratching Luci’s jawline and beneath his chin like a beloved pet. His stomach twisted every time Luci carved a path up his skin again. “Come for me, sweet boy.”
Luci winced, forehead pressed against Adam’s, eyes shut. Kissing him, Adam felt the orgasm- smaller but nonetheless powerful- course through the younger man. He sucked on Luci’s split tongue and pulled him close so Luci’s cum stuck them together anew. Wrapping his arms tightly around him, Adam took a drag on his cigarette and listened to Luci catch his breath.
The apartment was still around them. Night sounds of the building settling and cicadas singing outside wrapped around them like a blanket and Adam found himself smiling, relaxed. When Luci declined the offer of his cigarette, Adam snubbed it out in the small glass bowl on the nightstand and turned off the lamp next to the bed. Despite the fear of what it said about him, despite the fact that Luci would leave in the morning… His hands slid down over Luci’s shoulders and back, rubbing his satin skin, gently combing his sweat-damp hair back from his neck with his fingers. He felt lighter. The fact that he and Luci would never lay together again didn’t make any difference so long as both of them felt good. Judging from the way Luci snuggled closer and pushed his face against Adam’s neck, Adam thought they probably both did.
At some point, the cicada song and Luci’s warm breath against his neck pulled him under into an empty dreamscape. If he had dreams at all, they were ghostly recreations of Luci’s weight and warmth and moans. He couldn’t remember having a more restful sleep in a while and when he awoke it was to the sound of church bells.
Adam woke up, feeling stiff from the drinks he’d had the night before. Luci was sprawled diagonally across him and the bed on his back, legs spread, skin rosy with sleep. In the daylight, cocooned in sleep, he looked even younger. A special kind of hunger rose in Adam’s stomach and he sat up, pushing Luci’s thighs off of him. He turned away and swung his own legs over the edge of the bed, collecting himself. Work. He had to go to work and Luci had to go away. The night before was a pretty thought for later, but it was over.
He rubbed his own face to wake up, mussing his hair. A soft sound rose from the sheets behind him and the bed shifted as Luci sat up.
“Mm, Father?” Luci’s hand was warm on his back, sliding carefully up the vertebrae of his spine.
“I have work. Mass. I have to get ready. Just pull the door shut when you go to catch your train.”
Turning around would be the worst part, he realized, so he got it over with. There wasn’t hurt on Luci’s face, though it could have been present but muted under the veil of sleep still draped over him. Wanting to soften his words, Adam gently took Luci’s chin between his fingers and kissed him. “Feel free to use the shower and help yourself to anything in the fridge… Although I’m afraid there’s probably only beer…” He squinted like he was mentally consulting a catalogue of the refrigerator’s contents. “Maybe an egg…”
A laugh bubbled up inside Luci and he kissed Adam, cupping his face. “I had a really good time… A nice time.”
The maturity of Luci’s response let relief spiral through Adam like thread from a spool- but like thread it was thin. “If you’re ever in Nola again…”
Something curdled the edges of Luci’s smile and he shook his head slightly. “I’m not sure I will be… This is kind of…”
“...a permanent trip,” Adam finished, nodding. His mind vaguely recalled conversation over dinner between glass after glass of wine: something about a boyfriend or a job or something that would make any other realities featuring them together improbable. But what did he think he was going to do? Live in secret sin with a guy at least a decade his junior? Hide his lover up in his trashy top floor apartment and play the role of a devout priest for the public? So much for casual involvement. He groaned but didn’t mean to. Despite feeling embarrassed for his reaction, Luci gazed at him, gently stroking Adam’s hair.
“It was a one-night stand,” Luci said, though he sounded like he was waiting for Adam to confirm it.
“Yes,” Adam said, “I know.” He closed his eyes and then flashed Luci a winning smile, “I just haven’t had sex that damn good in a while.”
Something worried persisted in Luci’s expression. “Do you not do this often, Father?”
Adam stood, turning towards the bathroom. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
He showered and shaved in the tub, gently knocking his forehead into the tile wall again and again. He didn’t do this often; he wasn’t used to people leaving. At least with Daniel they still saw one another. Not that there was much between them romantically these days, not with Caleb wound around Daniel’s thighs. He gritted his teeth. If Daniel could hide his relationship with a choirboy, then couldn’t he have something with someone? If he hadn’t ratted Daniel out to the Monsignor, surely Daniel would do the same for him? Daniel couldn’t think he and Caleb were that sneaky, could he?
It was childish to compare what he had to what Daniel had. Daniel wasn’t an exorcist; Daniel wasn’t someone who had already transgressed sexually against someone he loved. Daniel deserved happiness even if it was unconventional. Luci deserved someone better. A good time; a nice time. When was the last time someone said that about having sex with him? Every time Adam closed his eyes in the shower, he saw Luci on his back, body flushed, every part of him desiring and needing Adam.
He jacked off quickly in the shower after trying to boil thoughts of Luci out of himself and dried off. Dressing in his cassock, making sure his hair was mostly dry, Adam cringed as his thoughts of Luci turned towards other emotions and needs: Luci in the rain, soaked, lost. Luci’s hesitancy at first to accept his offer of dinner and then Luci’s gratitude. Luci lighting up when Adam chose a restaurant that was maybe too fancy- glowing and looking just as good as the restaurant patrons dressed in pearls for a night on the town. The way Luci had leaned his cheek into his palm and leaned across the table in the candlelight to listen to Adam speak. The way he’d tried to dance with Adam drunkenly in the middle of an empty street after. The kindness in his touch in the morning light.
But these things….were just a one-night stand, weren’t they? Not enough to base anything else around, certainly. Caleb and Daniel had known one another for years before taking a chance, hadn’t they?
Adam delayed leaving the bathroom as long as he could, afraid of what his robes would ignite in the both of them: shame, regret, embarrassment. Instead, Luci seemed nonplussed. He gazed at him steadily, still draped across the sheets like some grown, Renaissance cherubim.
“I’m getting up,” he promised, “I’m leaving.”
“Take your time.”
Adam hesitated, then moved towards the bed for one last kiss. Luci moved towards him, on his knees, then stopped, hesitating. “I don’t want to get cum on you.”
A bitter laugh squeezed out of him, and Adam bumped noses with him. “I don’t care; I’m already a bad priest.”
It was a confession he expected Luci to shy away from. At this point, it was all self sabotage. Destroy all hope; push Luci away. Instead, after a cursory look, Luci threw his arms around him and kissed him- maybe more deeply than a parting kiss for a fling should be. He nudged his nose against his almost obnoxiously, squishing both of their noses comically. “What a pair we make.”
They both parted with a smile but Luci took Adam’s hands, keeping him from turning away. His expression was serious, almost bordering on stern and Adam was strangely reminded of the Monsignor- it was the way Luci searched his eyes, hypnotically holding him in place while he seemed to try to read his thoughts. “None of us will ever be good enough in the eyes of God. People don’t care; we’re all bad together. Isn’t that nice?”
Luci’s expression brightened again and it was contagious. They both smiled dumbly, like they’d just discovered something insignificant but precious together. Adam wasn't sure what to think about the words that had lifted off of Luci’s split tongue, but it was nice. His own tongue remained dumb and wouldn’t move correctly. Instead, he kissed Luci’s forehead. He wondered too late if it felt like a blessing.
Without another word, he turned from the bed but he stopped again, one hand on the doorknob. Gritting his teeth, he took a breath. If he didn’t say it, it would gnaw at him. “I know this is going to sound needy and pathetic as hell, but...if you wanted to stay... or if things don’t work out where you’re going…” He turned to look over his shoulder. “You’re more than welcome…”
Though his words fizzled out, Luci nodded. He understood. Closing the door behind him, Adam was treated to one last vision of Luci: surrounded in morning light in the middle of the bed, looking soft and holy.
Mass wasn’t long only because it was routine. He wondered if he seemed off to anyone. He thought maybe Daniel sensed something, but Daniel always seemed to be worried about him in some way or another. Usually, more and more often, it was in a nagging, vexing sort of way. Adam was grateful when the service completed without Daniel sharing a single word with him. He couldn’t help but notice the smiles shared by Daniel and Caleb, though. He wondered if the Monsignor knew. Surely, someone else noticed it.
The walk home was wearisome and slow, made worse by the sagging, wet heat of the afternoon. He figured he’d change clothes, drink… That was all, really. Maybe in a week, he’d confess it all to the Monsignor. Just put the nail in the coffin and bury this one. Who cared? None of it was lasting. Eternal riches only existed in Heaven.
Why he was so hung up on Luci, he couldn’t tell. Why he couldn’t just have sex and some occasional intimacy to keep him afloat… Although, he’d had the same domestic desires with Daniel. Someone to share a life with, someone to wake up to, someone to face the world with. Maybe Luci was just the latest victim to his whim.
Even so, he hoped, selfishly, that Luci left something behind...a hair tie, his panties, a note. At least the dirtied sheets would smell like him.
A wall of smell hit him the moment he opened the door to his apartment. The windows were open, and despite the heat of the day, a crossbreeze has aired out the space. It felt light and airy. The entire place smelled warm and sticky and….sweet. Peaches, he thought.
Confused, Adam stepped into the kitchen to find a peach cobbler sitting on the counter, cooling. A pan of eggs was on the stove. Beside the cobbler was a torn up train ticket.
Breath quickening, heart rising into his throat, Adam stepped back out into the apartment, swallowing thickly. The sheets on the bed were fresh and neatly tucked around the mattress. There was no other sign of Luci. Maybe he missed his train and bought a new ticket. Maybe that’s what the torn up ticket meant.
There was a rustling from the bathroom and the door opened. Tightening a hair tie around one of his messy little pigtails, Luci stepped out, looking newly rosy. The scent of soap wafted out from the bathroom after him. Upon seeing Adam, Luci stopped short, immediately tangling his own fingers together in front of him, looking as nervous as Adam felt. He shrugged.
“I don’t know how to cook much and I won’t cook much, but you had a few eggs and there was a lady down below on the street selling peaches and you had all the ingredients. I only left the door ajar with a shoe for a minute and then I came right back, but I thought about what you said… I wanna stay. Well, I wanna try it. I really had a nice time and if you want me gone in a day or a week or a month or-”
Adam crossed the room and silenced him, kissing him. He pulled him up into his arms, crushing him to himself, turning them until he could lay Luci back on the bed and kiss him until they both needed to breathe. Luci immediately spoke again. “I’ll find a job here, I’ll help pay the rent, even if it’s just for week or-”
Shaking his head, smiling, Adam pressed a finger to Luci’s lips. Luci smiled. When Adam lifted his finger again, Luci sucked down a breath and launched into a new topic. “I thought you’d be hungry.”
“I am hungry.”
“I’m usually really good about one-nighters… But this time I just… Something about you. I just wanna try it. I wanna get to know you… I wanna be a person with you.”
“You wanna be bad?”
Luci sighed, catching his breath. “Yeah, I wanna be bad.”
“Good,” Adam said, sliding a knee between Luci’s thighs, “That’s good. Me too.”
They ate the cobbler and eggs cold on the newly messy bed, curled up together and watched the day pass slowly.
A day turned into a week, turned into a month, and Luci didn’t leave. In the closet, new clothes began to join Adam’s vestments and band shirts. Evenings weren’t spent drinking alone but drinking together, dancing to loud rock music, and having sex. It’s not that Adam believed he deserved Luci any more than he did before...maybe he didn’t. But he was lucky and a person with Luci, cassock or not, and he thought maybe, just maybe he shouldn’t question it. After all, it was nice to be bad together.