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My Zany Roommate

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Prelude

     You sighed, taking a sip of your drink through the straw, blowing depressed bubbles into the cup. That was another potential roommate gone. You crossed the name off your small list. 'So that makes a cat lady, a druggie, and just a plain asshole.' You thought dryly, eyeing the last name on your list. 'Wade Wilson' Written in your handwriting. You sighed, you weren't scheduled to meet him for another hour and a half. You needed a roommate in order to sustain your decent apartment. It wasn't the ritz, but it was nicer than most of the other apartments in the area. You lived on the outskirts of Hell's Kitchen, making it considerably cheap, but not cheap enough to be sustained by a college student alone. Especially with limited funds.

     You stood up, stretching. A small walk would do wonders for your sore legs. The popping sound of your joints confirming this theory. You walked out, rolling your eyes at J. J. Jameson's ranting about Spider-Man. For the 5th time today. You were one of the people who rooted for him, you figured that he did he best. He had all of New York to protect on the street level. The Avengers protected the entire planet, so they were a little less likely to protect a random person getting mugged. You'd seen Spidey save people in person one time. You could careless about the man behind the mask, you knew he had to be a good man though, so you left it be.

     You paused, hearing the sound of struggle in the alleyway. 'Leave it alone.' Your common sense begged, but you had a minor hero complex. If someone was in trouble, and if you could do something about it, you had to do something. It was just your nature. Probably why you were on team Instinct rather than Valor or Mystic to be honest. You grabbed a pipe from the alleyway and entered, seeing a man holding a woman down, trying to rip her shirt open. Your eyes narrowed in fury, you saw red. You knew the effect rape had on someone, your best friend was buried in white six feet under with a broken neck because of it.

     "HEY ASSBUTT!" You shouted, throwing the pipe at the asshole, effectively knocking him off the woman. She looked at you like you were an angel as she scrambled up, running over to you. "Thank you! Thank you so much!" She said before continuing to run off, hopefully to call the cops. "You *huff* whore!" The would be rapist grabbed you, pulling you into the alley. "Oh really? They seem like a nice enough person to me." A cheerful voice said as the man was pulled off of you and promptly slung into an opposing wall. 

     A man in a red suit stood in front of you, a hand place menacingly on the katana on his back. "Seems like you're the piece of shit in this alley buddy." Deadpool said, a bit of an edge to his cheerful tone. You looked away as Deadpool cut the mans head off, before turning to you. "Why hello there! Nice to meet you, ignore the blood sweet cheeks. Say if you're not in too much shock can you tell me the way to "The Lucky Cat" café? I'm looking for a (Y/n) (L/n)." "T-That'd be me. So, you're Wade Wilson then?" You could practically see his smile. "Yup!" And that is how You met your roommate.