silentwalrus



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Recent series

  1. Words:
    26,690
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    Bookmarks:
    62
  2. Words:
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    5
  3. Words:
    216,629
    Works:
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Recent bookmarks

  1. Public Bookmark 23

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    Summary

    “You know, kids,” Steve heard from the backyard, “one of the most common threats a superhero has to face is inside an active volcano! We’re going to have to work on your evasion skills, so for the next five minutes, the floor is lava!” This was met by a sudden spike in both volume and pitch from the small children as they scrambled onto every raised surface they could find and immediately launched themselves right back off.

    “I’ve never seen actual lava in my entire life,” Steve said, vaguely offended.

    “You got a superhero impersonator for The Falcon’s niece’s birthday party,” Sam said, incredulous. “The Falcon, who is an actual superhero.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,419
    Chapters:
    1/5
    Comments:
    52
    Kudos:
    154
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    25
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    17 Feb 2018

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Uh,” Bucky stuttered. “I. Hi.”

    “Hi,” answered Captain Fucking America.

    “Hi,” said Bucky again, still completely unable to come up with anything else.

    “I was—hi?” said Captain America, sounding maybe a little panicked. “Hi.”

    “Yes. Hi,” Bucky said, trying to hold on to something he was certain of in this conversation. “Hello.”

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “Goddammit, Buck.” Steve groaned and propped himself up on one elbow, twisting his neck to look at the seat of his pants. “I landed right on the pizza. There’s pepperoni stuck to my ass.”

    “Looks good on you.” Barnes waggled his eyebrows. “I’ll lick it off if you want.”

    Steve fumbled through the wreckage of the table for a handful of napkins and threw them at Barnes’ face. “Buy me dinner first, jackass. Another dinner, since you ruined this one.”

    “You’re the one who sat on it.”

    “You tickled me!”

    “It’s combat training, Steve.” Barnes stretched his arms out and folded his hands behind his head, ignoring the napkins fluttering over his neck. “I’m doing this for your own good, you know. You’re Captain America. Gotta keep those reflexes sharp.”

    “Oh, is that how it is?” Steve rolled over Barnes, then flipped them both over so they were lying on the carpet instead of the splintered remains of the table. “Fine. Just remember, you started this.”

    “Bring it,” Barnes said, before stretching up for a kiss.

     

    (Soft Stucky Week fic featuring an escalating tickle war and an unnerving number of Bucky Bears.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,136
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    51
    Kudos:
    592
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    127
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    12 Feb 2018

    Bookmarker's Notes

    “Here’s the thing nobody understands about Bucky Barnes,” Sam said heavily. “You ever heard their little parting exchange about being stupid?”

    “‘Don’t do anything stupid until I get back’?”

    “Exactly. Everyone thinks Bucky’s saying be careful. What he’s actually saying is wait for me, I want to play too. Let me tell you, raiding Hydra bases with that duo is an experience.”

    BAHAHAHAHAHA

  3. Public Bookmark 20

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    Summary

    “That cat is wearing my bowtie,” Bucky says, as soon as they enter the room.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
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    Chapters:
    1/1
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    19
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    164
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    20
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    04 Feb 2018

    Bookmarker's Notes

    He stands and hands Bucky the cat, Bucky being weirdly careful with her like she’s a Faberge egg slathered in Crisco.

  4. Public Bookmark 21

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    Summary

    Steve and Bucky debate the ethics of sex pollen because they have nothing better to do with their time. No, really.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,308
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    75
    Kudos:
    233
    Bookmarks:
    21
    Hits:
    1237

    04 Feb 2018

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Wow. It smelled like peaches and summer and long days in bed with Bucky and golly gee, he was just gonna take a big old whiff of that thing.

     

    bucky: hey steve wat if u got fuck flowered
    steve: DIE I GUESS

  5. Public Bookmark 7

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    Summary

    Sam Wilson joins a totally normal, totally sensible pigeon club. (The Greendale Seven beg to differ.) This hobby is none of the other Avengers's business. (Steve, Bucky, and Natasha beg to differ.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    16,047
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    20
    Kudos:
    26
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
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    03 Feb 2018

    Bookmarker's Notes

    It was hard to take Bucky’s advice seriously. Bucky regularly advised him to drop Steve on enemy combatants. To be fair, Steve also regularly advised Sam to drop him on enemy combatants.

     

    “That’s how you know it’s good.” Sam, in case that was a dare, ate another fry. “You really know how to take a guy out on the town. I gotta say, though, if I wanted to hear ‘one time I worked in a restaurant and we dumped leftovers back in the pot’ stories while I eat, I’d have gone out with Bucky.”

    Natasha sighed fondly. “Isn’t it great how he has a horror story for every occasion?”

    “It’s great how he suddenly remembers every job he’s ever had when there’s a horror story to be told.” The fries, swimming in germs almost as old as his boyfriends or not, were crunchy on the outside, tender on the inside, and delicious all over. He ate another.