101 - 120 of 1115 Bookmarks by roachpatrol

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  1. Public Bookmark 23

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    “Yeah, yeah, laugh it up wise guy,” you crane your head to look over your other shoulder again. “I don’t suppose you can give me a hand?”

    Karkat’s mouth curls and it’s not nice at all. “Why Egbert, but that would mean crossing the line,” he says.

    -*-

    Featuring John Egbert as Newton and Karkat Vantas as Gottlieb

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,253
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    12
    Kudos:
    106
    Bookmarks:
    23
    Hits:
    1140

    23 Jun 2014

  2. Public Bookmark 9

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    Summary

    TT: So you've never done this before.
    TT: You haven't had the pleasure of exchanging sordid, smutty details with a willing partner for the express purpose of shootin' your wad.
    TT: That's okay. I'd love the honor of popping your sexting cherry.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    941
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    53
    Bookmarks:
    9
    Hits:
    1219

    16 Jun 2014

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Normally you’d get a warning for a shoot a couple of days in advance—you’re important enough you could even say no to one or two before people started bitching about it. Bonus of being imperially sanctioned. But Capricorn's a celebrity and you’re a celebrity and in the end, his agents apparently don’t want to wait any more than yours do.

    The porn’s not going to fucking make itself.

    (AKA "That Pale Porn Stars AU")

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    15,091
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    56
    Kudos:
    319
    Bookmarks:
    127
    Hits:
    2749

    14 Jun 2014

  4. Public Bookmark 18

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    Summary

    You’ve never been one for the ridiculous decadence that some of your fellow rulers go for—even when you crush another petty regime and the warlord’s possessions pass over to you, it’s rare for you to take on a troll from one of their harems. You’re picky. And it serves you well, because when your pale mates look up, from books and art and water and instruments, and see you, even though their names are kept secret (none of your concern, you have taught yourself not to wonder even though you want to know so badly sometimes) every single face is one you would trust with your life.

    Kink Meme Prompt: Warlord Karkat, and his harem of pale concubines.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,101
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    20
    Kudos:
    87
    Bookmarks:
    18
    Hits:
    697

    7 Jun 2014

  5. Public Bookmark 4

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    Summary

    Days later. Karkat was startled by a knock at his door. Will Smith had just welcomed an alien to Earth, or more accurately, Erf, and Karkat grumblingly hit the pause button. He rose and flipped the lock and opened the door up. He deadpanned immediately. "Sollux isn't here. I think he's in the lab." He closed the door again.

    Well, he would have, if Feferi hasn't shoved a shoe in the doorway so it couldn't close. "I'm not here to see Sollux. I'm here to talk to you."

    Karkat leaned on the door, trying to force in closed somehow. "No thank you. I don't want any. No solicitors. Please peddle your ass elsewhere." And suddenly he was stumbling backward. Feferi sure was strong for an heiress. Especially when ramming her shoulder against a metal door.

    "If you scuffed up my shoe I swear I'm going to polish it in your ass, when I kick it straight up there."

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,399
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    29
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    476

    7 Jun 2014

  6. Public Bookmark 5

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    Summary

    Cronus pierces himself to look like a hume, with predictable results. Porrim reluctantly cleans up the mess. H/C, ear piercing, body modification, infection, pus, grossness, lots of hurt and ew.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,529
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    18
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    206

    1 Jun 2014

  7. Public Bookmark 3

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    Summary

    Fill for the prompt: Remember when Dave and Karkat sparred for the first time and it was an utter disaster?

    (HSWC Bonus Round 1)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    420
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    39
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    424

    23 May 2014

  8. Public Bookmark 20

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    Summary

    Remember that time when Aradia took Eridan on a spelunking expedition?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    769
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    122
    Bookmarks:
    20
    Hits:
    556

    22 May 2014

  9. Public Bookmark 33

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    Summary

    Remember the first time Kanaya cut Karkat's hair?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,028
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    193
    Bookmarks:
    33
    Hits:
    1109

    22 May 2014

  10. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    The blur has resolved itself into a man, mostly covered in red and blue, who turns his masked head and snarks cheerfully at Tony.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,485
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    61
    Kudos:
    2148
    Bookmarks:
    475
    Hits:
    33229

    18 May 2014

  11. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “Heil Hydra,” the enemy agent shouts.

    “Heil this, motherfucker,” says Captain America, shooting off a rocket.

    Steve and Bucky find out Hollywood has been busy since they went away. A historical survey, including but not limited to: one set of exploded genitals, a brief interlude in France, Mel Gibson and other masterworks of casting, eight Academy awards, several dinosaurs, and something Tony Stark has ominously dubbed “the masterpiece.” Art included.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,228
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    430
    Kudos:
    5183
    Bookmarks:
    1789
    Hits:
    77425

    16 May 2014

  12. Public Bookmark 24

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    Summary

    They say breaking up is hard to do, but they didn't have a vampire alien trying to help, a game of troll Truth or Dare to navigate, and a city of cans to run.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,559
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    7
    Kudos:
    113
    Bookmarks:
    24
    Hits:
    663

    14 May 2014

  13. Public Bookmark 22

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    Summary

    Cranberry juice catastrophes, machiavellian/heroic XTREME STRIDER BULLSHIT, sloppy interspecies hookups against phallic bar bathroom graffiti, and Dave pissing on everyone's parade.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,197
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    11
    Kudos:
    98
    Bookmarks:
    22
    Hits:
    1347

    13 May 2014

  14. Public Bookmark 46

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    Summary

    "Whatever nasty ideas I just gave you, go for it. I'm your kinky alien sex toy for the night or whatever," and with Terezi looming over you and Karkat's big hands on you that's suddenly a seriously, intensely possible thing. You are having a vision of the future and it involves a lot of troll junk.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,023
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    332
    Bookmarks:
    46
    Hits:
    4155

    13 May 2014

  15. Public Bookmark 87

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    Summary

    It's hate at first sight for Karkat when Dirk sets foot on the meteor. All would be fine and simple if it stayed that way.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    45,727
    Chapters:
    15/20
    Comments:
    127
    Kudos:
    318
    Bookmarks:
    87
    Hits:
    6423

    11 May 2014

  16. Public Bookmark 16

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    Summary

    When Sollux gets one of his headaches, tender care would be the province of a matesprit or moirail. Despite this, there are things that his kismesis can do to help him along.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,660
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    82
    Bookmarks:
    16
    Hits:
    808

    9 May 2014

  17. Public Bookmark 15

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    Summary

    When you reach the point of literally talking to yourself for company, a new friend appears out of the blue. Is it too good to be true?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,663
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    22
    Kudos:
    129
    Bookmarks:
    15
    Hits:
    826

    9 May 2014

  18. Public Bookmark 26

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    Summary

    You're five sweeps old when you make the mistake. At seven point four sweeps you're still hoping it might be the best one you ever made.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,094
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    115
    Bookmarks:
    26
    Hits:
    853

    9 May 2014

  19. Public Bookmark 6

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    Summary

    Jeeves comes into a bit of money. Enter ruses, angry words over gentlemen's accessories, Bingo attempting to be helpful, and a trip to India.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    15,849
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    68
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    1301

    9 May 2014

  20. Public Bookmark 18

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    Summary

    For random_nexus. Jeeves gets his mitts on some Victorian fiction of a rummy sort and it is SO good he must find the author. Now who do you suppose that might be?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,885
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    7
    Kudos:
    130
    Bookmarks:
    18
    Hits:
    1657

    8 May 2014

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