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  1. Rec *

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    Summary

    "There are bees on my roof. Bees, Pep."

    "I think you mean my roof, as the building belongs to Stark Industries, of which I am CEO."

    "The important word in that sentence was bees."

    (Or: the one in which Pepper accidentally introduces Bucky to gardening therapy.)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,595
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    104
    Kudos:
    1018
    Bookmarks:
    234
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    23 Nov 2014

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Lovely, very satisfying.

  2. Rec *

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    "Jane's cute," Clint says, shoveling yet another sloppy joe into his pie-hole. Darcy has been watching him inhale a disturbing amount of food for the last half-hour. This is why she likes eating lunch with the guys instead of why-yes-I'd-love-some-brussel-sprouts-on-the-side Sharon. They're good for her ego. She may eat like a hippo, but she'll never eat as much as Steve, Clint, or Barnes. "She's totally on my FUCK shortlist."

    All of a sudden the crystal clear sky outside cracks with the loudest thunder Darcy has ever heard in her life. The windows rattle. Everyone freezes. Darcy can practically hear everyone's assholes tighten in fear.

    Because across the commissary, Thor is looking at their table.

    And it ain't raining panties this time. Just righteous, godly anger.

    --

    The dudes FINALLY play MARRY FUCK KILL, not-so-Avengers edition. (Because there's like ONE actual female Avenger. Thanks, SHIELD.)

    Wherein no one follows the rules, everyone still kills Tony, the Mets suck, (lots of theoretical threesomes?!), and Darcy turns Clint into a hypothetical honey badger. (And honey badger don't care. Honey badger don't give a shit.)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,258
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    192
    Kudos:
    1707
    Bookmarks:
    287
    Hits:
    22935

    22 Nov 2014

  3. Rec *

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    "Actually, you know, I get it. Rogers would be an excellent MARRY choice. You know that he'd never leave the toilet seat up, would never drink the last of the milk, and would clean the rain gutters without prompting," Darcy says. She's never really considered Steve as anything other than Captain America who is impossibly unapproachable; weirdly enough, the things she finds intimidating about him as a person oddly work for her in a domestic setting. "Ugh, plus you just KNOW Barton would be the type of fucker that would eat the last oreo and then shove the empty box back into the cupboard."

    "So what's your list then, Darcy?" Jane asks, turning back to look at the mold, which has done exactly fuck all in the last half-hour.

    "Don't rush me! I need to make an informed, calculated choice."

    Darcy looks down at her pad, then back up at Natasha. She purses her lips in thought. "You've fucked Barnes, right? How dexterous is that metal hand?"

    --

    The ladies of SHIELD play a mass game of MARRY FUCK KILL, Avengers edition.

    Wherein everyone marries Steve, kills Tony, Jane betrays science and Darcy hypothetically turns Thor into a llama.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,116
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    261
    Kudos:
    1881
    Bookmarks:
    475
    Hits:
    23252

    22 Nov 2014

    Bookmarker's Notes

    So funny.

  4. Rec *

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    Darcy Lewis just wanted to strike out on her own. Unfortunately, she lands in Washington, DC, ten minutes before three helicarriers fall from the sky.

    Warning: WiP, with all that implies. Expect plenty of cliffhanging.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,993
    Chapters:
    14/?
    Comments:
    176
    Kudos:
    750
    Bookmarks:
    187
    Hits:
    12101

    17 Nov 2014

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Darcy's life is weird, but she kind of likes it.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,049
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    208
    Kudos:
    1561
    Bookmarks:
    462
    Hits:
    23320

    10 Nov 2014

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