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  1. Rec *

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    Allow me to define the word "office-mate" for you: it's a noun. Not a verb.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,289
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    25
    Kudos:
    1150
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    285
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    22 Oct 2017

  2. Rec *

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    "They think you paid me to be here," hisses Eggsy.

    Harry stares at him. "I made your favorite dinner and I have to let your wretched beast sleep on the bed for a month," he says flatly.

    "No, they think you paid me to be here," says Eggsy.

    "My dear boy," says Harry, "do you think all these third wives married my classmates out of the purity of their affections?"

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,240
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    238
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    4039
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    845
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    21 Oct 2017

  3. Rec *

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    Bilbo is quite convinced that all the problems plaguing them in the mountain - specifically, Thorin acting quite unlike himself - stem from the blasted Arkenstone. The thing is probably cursed, and it's up to him to get it as far away from Thorin as he can - and while he's at it, he might as well try to stop a war before it starts.

    Rather than offering Bard and Thranduil the Arkenstone, Bilbo offers to give them his share of the treasure if they will please go away. Unfortunately, neither of them is willing to believe Thorin will hand it over - which leads to a ransom plan that is, in Bilbo's opinion, quite ridiculous and doomed to fail from the start. But at least that blasted stone is out of the mountain.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    49,094
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
    255
    Kudos:
    1410
    Bookmarks:
    434
    Hits:
    29911

    20 Oct 2017

  4. Rec 78

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    This was definitely not in her job description. And yet, here she was, Deputy Head of the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures, and somehow doing a job better suited to an Unspeakable. How on earth did she get assigned to helping Salazar Slytherin get settled into life in the twenty-first century? And how in Merlin's name was she going to manage all that on top of her regular duties?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,118
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    317
    Bookmarks:
    78
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    3443

    08 Oct 2017

  5. Rec 43

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    "Bruce," he says. "What else am I gonna do? Crawl back into my grave? I kinda fucked up the roof there."

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,168
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    255
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    43
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    2701

    06 Oct 2017