5 Works by cranialaccessory
9 Feb 2013
“'All right boys!” Thorin shouted, and blew a shrill note on his whistle. “And a one, and a two, and a three…” and at his signal, the musicians burst into an enthusiastic, if off-key, rendition of “Don’t Stop Believing.”
Bilbo couldn’t contain his groan. He could already feel a headache coming on, and had never regretted leaving his headphones home more. Normally, he would’ve suffered in silence, bearing the torment of the cacophony and trying his hardest like the rest of the passengers not to make eye contact when the oldest member of the group came around with a hat full of crumpled dollar bills. But today he had had enough."
Thorin and Co are not particularly good subway musicians, Gandalf is a drug dealer, and Bilbo is not really a quest person.
"I am simply pointing out, that in the past few months, I have had more gay sex than I ever, ever considered having.”
Desmond drank deeply from his beer, and made a face. He was Assassin, but he was above all things a bartender, and this cheap, off-brand beer was an assault on all things he held dear.
“Like, at least two lifetimes worth of gay sex.”
Kadeen had always known that Anton was ignorant. But this is above and beyond.
In which Kadeen learns about Anton's proclivities, sexual tension is instigated, and much wine is consumed.
12 Aug 2012
Stella knows how labor-intensive Stark’s hairstyle is, and how long it takes to put on makeup. Howard might’ve been vain and self-centered, but he’d never put his personal appearance before a mission. “If we’re going to be working together,” Stella says, “I want you to take things other than your appearance seriously.”
Stark’s smile is even more brittle, this time around. “Thanks for the tip, Mom. It’s good news that we won’t really be working together much, then, isn’t it?”
28 Apr 2012
Ripper shoves the man up against the brick wall, hungry and overwhelmed and shaking like a fiend. The man’s mouth tastes like cigarettes, which Ripper loves, and a strange sweet metal flavor, which he doesn’t.
Giles and Spike, throughout the years.