1 - 20 of 312 Works by beetle

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    Bodhi Rook’s roommates and best friends, Jyn Erso and Cassian Andor, are inseparable and intense. As well as engaged, and about to be married in less than a month. Bodhi has never felt a fraction of that kind of attraction or attachment to anyone, and is entirely sure he doesn’t want to. Enter Jyn’s widower father, Galen Erso, just in time for the elopement, and best-man Bodhi’s world is turned upside down.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    85,784
    Chapters:
    16/16
    Comments:
    125
    Kudos:
    155
    Bookmarks:
    16
    Hits:
    3211
  2. Tags
    Summary

    It’s been almost a week since the night up-and-coming drag-performer, “Ms. Vagina Saskatchewan,” a.k.a. Wade Wilson, was rescued by one “The Spider-Man,” a.k.a. Peter Parker. In that near-week, nothing much has happened. Except for near-nonstop sexcapades, and the fact that Peter has only left Vagina’s/Wade’s side once, and that was the Evening After the Rescue, to get a few changes of clothes, his laptop, and some Spidey-supplies. Since then, Peter and Vagina/Wade have left all reality beyond a creaking futon and tiny shower far behind.

    Unfortunately, reality—in the form of two nosy, mother-henning best friends; two worried, over-invested ex-boyfriends, and two concerned, slightly scandalized parents—will present some tough-to-ignore interruptions with demands for answers and returns to responsibilities.

    And all Peter and Vagina/Wade wanna do is have sex then eat scrambled eggs while watching Hot in Cleveland.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,364
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    61
    Bookmarks:
    9
    Hits:
    824
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Four times in which Eugene “Flash” Thompson, facing an absence of fondness, takes whatever’s left. And one time in which whatever’s left just happens to be all the fondness he never thought he’d get. Prompt in end notes.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    0
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    3
    Hits:
    213
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Far to the North, in a place where winter's icy sleep holds eternal sway, a weary pneumokinetic and a wary elemental have a fated showdown with Death.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,413
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    4
    Hits:
    32
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Four times in which Eugene “Flash” Thompson, facing an absence of fondness, takes whatever’s left. And one time in which whatever’s left just happens to be all the fondness he never thought he’d get. Atmosphere and tone very much powered by Neko Case’s brilliant Fox Confessor Brings the Flood. Prompt in end notes.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,959
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    25
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    336
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Felix Hardy’s in a real bind, thanks to a certain Avenging Arachnid. And said arachnid isn’t interested in letting Felix go. Perhaps it’s because he caught Felix attempting to tamper with someone’s brakes. That Spider-Man’s such a buttinsky. Here’s the song that drove this piece. Prompt in the end notes.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,697
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    11
    Kudos:
    8
    Hits:
    160
  7. Tags
    Summary

    Christina “Angel Dust” Vetrano is a veteran Muay Thai and MMA boxer on Team Ajax, along with Wade “Deadpool” Wilson and others, which is managed by her best friend and trainer, Francis “Ajax” Freeman. Dust is good at her job, likes it, likes her teammates—even that mouthy, obnoxious asshole Wade—and likes her life. So what if she’s lonely? So what if every day has become exactly the same: wake up, workout, train, workout some more, fight matches (usually win), then go home, sleep, and do it all again the next day. So what if her best friend and personal Jesus Christ-like savior, Francis is turning into Ajax, someone she neither knows nor likes, and who has a bad habit of being an abusive shit to his boyfriend and his team?

    And so what if her neighbor and handy-man, the mysterious, but genial and gentlemanly Peter Nikolaievitch, has taken in a pretty, shaven-headed, darkly magnetic runaway who calls herself Negasonic Teenage Warhead, dresses like one of the goth-kids from South Park, and has eyes full of haunting secrets and haunted pain?

    So-the-fuck-what? Dust has matches to win and business to mind. Dealing with everyone else’s bullshit is above her pay-grade.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,635
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    17
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    175
  8. Tags
    Summary

    Formerly titled "Dancing in the Dark." Poe Dameron's a man of undead secrets, buried soul-deep, and quiet despair that's nibbling away at his very sense of self. He's a drunken, dissociative mess of a cardboard villain . . . one who finally hits bottom. The question becomes: Does he dig his nadir a little deeper and a little deeper, till he reaches his Hell . . . or begin the steep, slippery climb back up? Is that Hell inevitable either no matter what he chooses? Are all endings the same whether he sinks or rises? What price the comfortably numb descent? And what price the painfully difficult ascent? What terrible price?

    Fortunately or not . . . he meets a man with some unwitting answers.

    For Stardusteddameron. Full prompt in end notes. Plus: FANART!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,515
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    11
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    229
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Right before and after Bucky is awakened, Steve loses sleep, broods, and realizes he might be in love. But not with Bucky.

    The theme of these twelve escalating (by one hundred words for each “night”) drabbles, droubbles, trabbles, and so on, is a countdown of the Twelve Nights of Christmas: December 24th to January 5th. Written for the Advent Challenge posted on Facebook by Magi_Silverwolf.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,002
    Chapters:
    12/12
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    55
    Kudos:
    34
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    749
  10. Tags
    Summary

    The scavengers found the mi-chang boy wandering naked through the deeps of the jungle, among the long-abandoned ruins of a Thiền temple of which the faces of all the Buddhas and bodhisattvas had been defaced or destroyed . . . the scavengers were, after a mere few hours, certain the boy could replicate, but not understand language at all, as a concept or a practice. The only thing for it was to take him to the priests at the Nameless Temple and let them sort the boy out.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    34,865
    Chapters:
    5/8
    Comments:
    52
    Kudos:
    22
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    590
  11. Tags
    Summary

    A send-up of superhero and supervillain comics, movies, television shows, and books. In which damn-near everyone is LGBTQIA, some people are non-binary, and a few people aren't even from Earth.

    'Ware the tags. If the story, which is WIP, takes a turn, I'll note in tags and in chapter notes before the story. Okay? Okay.

    Shall we, then?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,982
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Kudos:
    1
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    50
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Spider-Woman is kicking ass and taking names when it comes to crime in New York City—and occasionally the New York City of alternate Earths . . . even that one that was all shrimp—Gwendo S. is killin’ it-killin’ it as the drummer for the cantankerous, but surprisingly talented Mary Janes. Yet Gwen Stacy, however, is . . . drifting, and has been since she failed to save her troubled best friend’s life five years ago. And if she couldn’t even save sweet, cheated Peter . . . how the hell can she save herself? Full prompt in end notes.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,697
    Chapters:
    1/10
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    8
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    152
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Handsome Alpha-boy meets sexy omega boy. Sexy omega-boy is suffering a broken heart. Despite their lack of chemistry, handsome Alpha-boy, in his customary, soft-hearted way takes pity on sexy omega-boy. And also takes him to get blind, stinking drunk. While omega-boy is engaged in that rewarding pastime, Alpha-boy trips, stumbles, and falls head-over-heels . . . for omega-boy’s best friend, a sassy, unshaven, near-sighted omega with playful, sparkling eyes, a quick, wicked sense of humor, and a mouth like a sailor on leave.

    The question becomes, which omega does an Alpha escort home? The one he feels responsible for? Or the one he wants to bend over a piece of furniture? Is it always bros before hos, or is there wiggle-room? And what's love got to do with it?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,117
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    49
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    1292
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Wade Wilson is a dishonorably discharged vet from Canada, making a new life for himself in New York City after going into heat cost him his military career. This time, three years later, when he goes into heat, he gets proactive about it and turns to the only matchmaking service he can sort-of afford, in the hopes of finding a heat-mate to get him through the worst of his season. Because with a mug like his, that’s all he can hope to get, right? And certainly not a permanent mate?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,789
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    160
    Kudos:
    402
    Bookmarks:
    80
    Hits:
    5516
  15. Tags
    Summary

    The title says it all. Feel free to prompt me from this Tumblr post of prompts, either on Tumblr, or in comments here :-)

    First trabble's prompt: "Wade and Weasel - Zip Me."

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    300
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    9
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    202
  16. Tags
    Summary

    It’s still not a date. Ms. Vagina Saskatchewan’s neither cheap nor easy, it has to be said. Then again, Vagina’s never met anyone like Peter the Spider-Man. And neither has her alter-ego, Wade Wilson.

    (Um, it kinda helps to have read the previous story in the series, “Damsel,” but if you didn’t, the TL;DR is: drag performer Vagina Saskatchewan, a.k.a. Wade Wilson, was jumped in an alley after a show and rescued by some avenging weirdo who called himself “The Spider-Man.” Said avenging weirdo, who was apparently named Peter, in his non-avenging hours, stayed with Vagina throughout her visit to the E.R., and—while insisting her rescue was their “first date,” and the E.R. their second—took Vagina up on her hastily-made decision to let him accompany her home.)

    But it’s still not a date.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,098
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    39
    Kudos:
    106
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    1050
  17. Tags
    Summary

    “He remembered the forceful hand that cast him to the Earth. He'd fallen like a shooting star, his flesh burning until his wings fell away. Pain was something he had never known before. But even worse than the physical affliction was the knowledge that he would forevermore be denied Heaven.”
    ― James Burnham, The Fruit of the Fallen

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,862
    Chapters:
    2/5
    Comments:
    35
    Kudos:
    36
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    529
  18. Tags
    Summary

    Wade’s not romantic. And Peter . . . Peter’s suddenly kind of sick of that. Fluff and light angst. Flangst. Written for a picture prompt, link in end notes. Blame White for the title, 'cause I sure do.

    Notes/Warnings: Set post Homecoming, but also AU for Homecoming, in that there’s no past MJ/Peter.

    For ImSoVain because GREAT PROMPT, and for Epervier because you're in my heart and in my thoughts, even when I'm being a grumbly, non-communicative douche-canoe.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,032
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    143
    Bookmarks:
    23
    Hits:
    2032
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Set immediately after Spider-Man and Deadpool are rescued from a HYDRA ship that put out to sea with the two costumed crusaders held prisoner. Peter had said that if he and Wade made it out of HYDRA's clutches alive, he’d gladly be Wade’s “Pillow Princess,” which Wade had seemed pretty overjoyed about. Now, it’s a few hours later, on the evening of their rescue, and . . . well, Peter’s a man of his word. And Wade? Wade's nowhere to be found.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,738
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    59
    Kudos:
    309
    Bookmarks:
    49
    Hits:
    4764
  20. Tags
    Summary

    After a sexy night in, Wade and Peter have plans together for their unprecedented day off, tomorrow, but . . . “the best laid plans of mice and men,” as Burns once noted. Nevertheless, happy ending is RIDICULOUSLY HAPPY. So, yeah. Fluff. Smut. Pure, unadulterated fluff-smut. Flut. Full prompt in end notes.

    Notes/Warnings: AU. No nutritional value. No warnings, either. Also? Shameful misappropriation of one of the greatest poems of the English language: [i carry your heart with me(i carry it in].

    ALSO? MAD CREDIT, YO, to Epervier, for the idea of Wade drawing sexually explicit images on a note. I lifted that, whole cloth, from the AWESOME fic: Deadpool Thinks Donald Trump Is French For Moodkill! Read it, if you wanna read Wade-drawings done right!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,576
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    37
    Kudos:
    118
    Bookmarks:
    31
    Hits:
    1910

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