1 - 20 of 100 Works by Vulgarweed

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    (Bookverse: post-quest, post-Scouring of the Shire). When Frodo falls ill while Sam is off planting trees to restore the Shire with the aid of Galadriel’s gift, it falls to Rosie to help tend to him. His wounds go much deeper than flesh - and so does Rosie’s healing offer.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,931
    Chapters:
    1/2
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    15
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    88
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Captain John Watson endures bondage and sensory deprivation, among other enhanced interrogation techniques. Worst of all: manscaping.

    Consensual kink play, established John/Sherlock/Mary poly triad. Almost certainly a scene from Genetic Markers-verse, but just a few lines strongly suggest that.

    Written for the "Sensory Deprivation" or "Shaving/Waxing" squares on my Season of Kink card.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,120
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    13
    Kudos:
    49
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    494
  3. Tags
    Summary

    I had a mess of these sitting around on my Livejournal, and will likely write more. Odds and sods that don't fit in the larger stories. Each drabble will be its own chapter.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,450
    Chapters:
    9/?
    Comments:
    194
    Kudos:
    186
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    2190
  4. Tags
    Summary

    "It's a bonny thing," said he. "Just see how it glints and sparkles. Of course it is a nucleus and focus of crime. Every good stone is. They are the devil's pet baits. In the larger and older jewels every facet may stand for a bloody deed.” - Sherlock Holmes, The Adventure of the Blue Carbuncle, Arthur Conan Doyle

    Sequel to With Both Hands Thou Shalt Give It. After Melkor murdered Finwë and stole the Silmarils, fleeing to the lands across the sea, Fëanor, the Silmarils’ maker, led an army in hot pursuit to avenge his father and reclaim his treasure, swearing an oath that would doom them all. And the Fëanorians were followed by the eccentric, brilliant, and fearlessly kinky Maia detective called Sérelókë, who can always be trusted to stick his nose (and other parts) into the meat of any fascinating and dangerous crime. In Beleriand, he will find a rich playground for all his passions, and meet a companion who will change his life forever.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    50,525
    Chapters:
    10/10
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    103
    Kudos:
    79
    Bookmarks:
    18
    Hits:
    1709
  5. Tags
    Summary

    For the Wits On Tap Challenge - a slightly dysfunctional English sonnet for two slightly dysfunctional Englishmen. A poetic remix of the wonderful, atmospheric My Heart the Red Sun, Your Heart the Moon Clouded by tiltedsyllogism.

    Syl's story is a songfic inspired by Mystery by the Indigo Girls, so I took my title from that song as well.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    153
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    28
    Hits:
    195
  6. Tags
    Summary

    During the all-too-brief years of Balin's reclamation of Khazad-dûm, the Ranger Aragorn of the Dúnedain embarks on a mission to gather information and warn the Dwarves of peril. The Doors of Durin are still shut, and the peril that lurks nearby is one no one had imagined.

    Written for Porn Battle Amnesty. Prompt: Aragorn/Watcher in the Water, tentacles, lust, pheromones, wet, indignity, body, shame, undressed, slime, dark, mud

    HUGE thanks to Besina for very quick beta work!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,921
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    36
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    562
  7. Tags
    Summary

    The ageing housing stock of central London is picturesque but delicate, and often harbours destructive pests who wreak havoc on the fragile structures. If such damage is spotted, building owners and managers are advised to contact a skilled professional who is well-versed in the control of vandalous creatures.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,875
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    28
    Kudos:
    39
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    892
  8. Tags
    Summary

    This is a scene from the world of the Bone Fiddle stories I’ve co-written with htebazytook: set in Appalachia in the early 1970s, where urban exile!Sherlock and Vietnam vet!John explore the seamy southern Gothic underbelly of the fog-shrouded mountains. Through a new case and an old acquaintance, John learns a bit about Sherlock’s past and certain elements of his undercover work - just how far was he willing to go for a case? And just how far will John go with him?

     

    Written in 24 hours for the Come_at_Once challenge. Prompt: "I thought it was obvious." Beta'd at HEROIC SPEED by Persian Slipper (Luthe)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,757
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    56
    Kudos:
    132
    Bookmarks:
    14
    Hits:
    1686
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Adam and Pepper, now married with children of their own, worry that their kids might be losing some of the magic of the season. Adam calls in a little favour from some old friends - with a nice little bonus that's in it for them. Established relationship A/C, a little fluff, a little comedy, a little Bentley smut.

    Written for AJ Crowlor in the 2015 Good Omens Holiday Exchange

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,738
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    66
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    637
  10. Tags
    Summary

    So Polyshipping Day is actually a monthly thing? First day of every month? FANTASTIC. I will try to add to this every month. Each chapter is a different ficlet or drabble.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,200
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    19
    Kudos:
    39
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    537
  11. Tags
    Summary

    Sauron and Thuringwethil are summoned to their Master's throne to serve His pleasure. They are not sure that they'll survive it.

    A 1,000-word PWP written entirely in rhyming couplets - I think that merits a warning all its own.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,006
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    31
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    301
  12. Tags
    Summary

    “There was a growling sound outside, and a noise as of some great animal scuffling at the door. Bilbo wondered what it was, and whether it could be Beorn in enchanted shape, and if he would come in as a bear and kill them. He dived under the blankets and hid his head, and fell asleep again at last in spite of his fears.” [The Hobbit, Chapter 7 "Queer Lodgings," J.R.R. Tolkien)

    That wasn’t entirely fear Bilbo felt when he first saw Beorn change - seems our hobbit has a bear kink (figuratively and literally). Beorn and Thorin manage to co-operate long enough to indulge him.

    Written for the “Animal Play” square in Seasons of Kink

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,001
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    18
    Kudos:
    115
    Bookmarks:
    16
    Hits:
    2720
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Mary is stuck in a self-loathing spiral because she thinks she’s fucked up badly - and she’s not used to fucking up badly being something one can survive. She needs confession and catharsis. Who’s she going to to go to - a therapist? A priest? Nope. She’s going to seek out the type of specialist who actually can help her. (Spoiler alert: Irene does.)

    There's a surprise guest star cameo at the end.

    For both Femslash June and the ‘Humiliation’ square on my Seasons of Kink card.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,181
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    36
    Bookmarks:
    9
    Hits:
    1127
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Of all the residents of Valinor, the eccentric and disreputable Maia called Sérelókë would be the last person you’d expect a Valië to call upon in time of need. But Sérelókë is known for his observation and insights, and Yavanna Kementári will stop at nothing to learn the truth of who killed her beloved Trees, and why. Once set upon the trail, Sérelókë will also stop at nothing.

    Really. I mean he’ll stop at nothing.

    And while I can’t take credit or blame for the original idea . . . oh wait, yes I can. I claimed my own prompt.

    UPDATE March 17, 2016: now with fantastic FANART by elfrightsactivist, commissioned as a gift by Sunhawk. THANK YOU!

    This tale now has a sequel: The Dark Fire Will Avail You.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,761
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    88
    Kudos:
    79
    Bookmarks:
    13
    Hits:
    1647
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Inspired by Chapter 1 of Happiness by unreconstructedfangirl. It’s a WIP, only one chapter up so far, so that’s all I had to go on. But it’s lovely and (she promises) hopeful, a beautiful story about aging John and Sherlock facing serious illness, and there’s already a lot to work with for a poet. I offer up this slightly mangled and subverted villanelle.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    150
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    11
    Kudos:
    30
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    300
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Temeraire has searched long and hard for his lost captain, in a strange and distant land. One very large obstacle presents itself and demands his attention. And other things.

    Fulfillment of his quest comes with a price, and Middle-earth's future is subtly altered.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,243
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    21
    Kudos:
    81
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    1226
  17. Tags
    Summary

    “When you've begun to think like a gun / the days of the year have suddenly gone” --John Cale, “Gun”

    Three addicts, now never hurting for a supply for their danger fix. They’ve warped and changed each other to fit together better. They really do love each other deeply, never more so than when they’re being terrible role models.

    Author’s Note: This is an AU where everything’s the same except Mary was never pregnant. (I just didn’t feel like dealing with a baby in this one.) For the Porn Battle XV prompts: John Watson/Sherlock Holmes/Mary Morstan, games, voyeurism, secrets, truth, lies, vows, danger, guns, adrenaline, forever,

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,181
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    28
    Kudos:
    110
    Bookmarks:
    18
    Hits:
    1653
  18. Tags
    Summary

    Some babies are born with hair, or with teeth. Some with a caul, some with a tail. Sherlock Holmes was born with an olive drab bandana in his right pocket.

    Written in about 7 hours for the Come at Once 24-hour porn challenge, Mildredandbobbin tagged me with the prompt: “retribution”. The title is a British and Canadian military slang term that refers to long, hard, punishment or hardship, particularly when disproportionate to the infraction.

    HUGE thanks to Winter_of_our_discontent for the very fast beta (in-person in a coffee shop, no less)!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,059
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    130
    Kudos:
    700
    Bookmarks:
    111
    Hits:
    8802
  19. Tags
    Summary

    In the spring of 1916, some in London and Dublin were fighting a war on two fronts. Three, if you include the heart. (Too long a sacrifice can make a stone of it.)

     

    Written in the 2014 Good Omens Holiday Exchange for tomato_greens, who wanted references to Yeats's poems "Easter, 1916" and/or "Leda and the Swan," especially with a historical setting and Yeats as a character.

    If you notice any especially beautiful lines in this story, you can be sure they’re Yeats, not me.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,669
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    33
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    494
  20. Tags
    Summary

    The war is ending and the troops are returning. They do not always mean well. Their loved ones are not always glad to see them. A case straight out of an old folktale has deep repercussions for Sherlock and John.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,397
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    62
    Kudos:
    242
    Bookmarks:
    14
    Hits:
    2409

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