1 - 20 of 23 Works by Cephied_Variable

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    When Anduin turned sixteen, his father said: “Anduin, you are a prince. Choose your friends and lovers wisely.”

    Less than six months earlier, Velen had told him: “It is important to light the way, but you do not illuminate the path for the sole purpose of straying from it.”

    It did not seem likely that these two pieces of advice would ever be at odds.

    Words:
    9,685
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    12
    Kudos:
    40
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    536
  2. Tags
    Summary

    The very first time he met Rose Lalonde he was quite certain that everything about her was a fabrication. The very last time he met her, he knew the act by heart.

    Words:
    3,797
    Chapters:
    1/4
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    170
    Bookmarks:
    34
    Hits:
    3276
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Newternia's streets are merciless, especially if you happen to be a hard-boiled human Detective on your first case with a crazy Legislacerator.

    Oh, your city lies in dust my friend. Your city lies in dust.

    Words:
    37,735
    Chapters:
    27/30
    Comments:
    279
    Kudos:
    1089
    Bookmarks:
    309
    Hits:
    65216
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Twelve years ago, sixteen teenagers were given the chance to change their futures, fortunes, and that of their hometown. Now it's 2021, and Paradox City is the hub for superheroism, supervillainy, super-gritty organized crime, and spandex as far as the eye can see.

    Words:
    6,818
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    15
    Kudos:
    203
    Bookmarks:
    43
    Hits:
    8031
  5. Tags
    Summary

    This is a story about love. This is a story about betrayal. Of heterosexuality, Heee Haw, and growing up.

    This is a story about prom.

    Words:
    22,649
    Chapters:
    5/8
    Comments:
    88
    Kudos:
    885
    Bookmarks:
    269
    Hits:
    49726
  6. Tags
    Summary

    This is not a thing that your patience is made for. Your patience is for flowers and the sky and dogs who know how to fold the universe in half but not how to fetch an irradiated steak. You don’t know how to do this part at all.

    [a remix of Lock it Up and Leave]

    Words:
    2,948
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    234
    Bookmarks:
    37
    Hits:
    4189
  7. Tags
    Summary

    A collection of Short Pieces and Kink Meme Fills.

    Words:
    4,506
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    100
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    4227
  8. Tags
    Summary

    Dave and Terezi do a shitty sidequest and experience the Dark Nak of their Soul.

    Written for the Homestuck Shipping Olympics 2011.

    Words:
    2,973
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    266
    Bookmarks:
    81
    Hits:
    6639
  9. Tags
    Summary

    So many centuries wasted searching for potential in my Alternian Troll girls. How could I - even in my omnipotence - have possibly envisioned you as the end result of my search? A pale, soft thing with dagger wit and steeled will?

    A useless question, of course. I could and did envision it. I was merely being melodramatic for effect.

    Words:
    4,272
    Chapters:
    1/3
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    59
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    1674
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Davesprite thinks this interspecies partnership in incredibly shitty cartooning is getting a little ill-advised there, bro.

    He's probably right.

    Words:
    1,538
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    75
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    2017
  11. Tags
    Summary

    It's a dumb idea like most of Terezi's ideas. For one, they don't tell anyone they're going.

    For another, they've got no destination.

    Words:
    5,185
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    40
    Kudos:
    225
    Bookmarks:
    65
    Hits:
    6574
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Your name is John Egbert and you know you are not a homosexual.

    Apparently your friends were informed otherwise.

    Words:
    4,178
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    48
    Kudos:
    724
    Bookmarks:
    158
    Hits:
    14689
  13. Tags
    Summary

    woah
    rewind
    you been lookin at my ass vantas

    Words:
    1,125
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    7
    Kudos:
    261
    Bookmarks:
    28
    Hits:
    6036
  14. Tags
    Summary

    >DAVE: examine your life, examine your choices

    examine the fact that troll love is based on pity, not fondness.

    Words:
    2,743
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    7
    Kudos:
    148
    Bookmarks:
    38
    Hits:
    3384
  15. Tags
    Summary

    “John, when you were eleven you didn’t even know what sex was. If you did, you would not have clicked on that link for two girls one cup. Twice.”

    This is the straightest most bro-est make out session that ever happened. Not even a little bit of it is gay. Nope.

    Words:
    3,453
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    13
    Kudos:
    320
    Bookmarks:
    64
    Hits:
    7913
  16. Tags
    Summary

    You do your best Dave Strider impression: "hey terezi hey tz hey tz wanna argue cause i do bluh bluh meat popsicle."

    Dave and Terezi yell at each other. It gets kind of embarrassing. Dave? Did you hate your brother?

    Words:
    3,220
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    97
    Bookmarks:
    21
    Hits:
    2704
  17. Tags
    Summary

    After SBURB, the kids are stranded on a newly restored Alternia where they are forced to deal with all kinds of terrible, crazy alien crap like troll dating and getting shot with laser guns and intergalactic freedom movements. In space, no one can hear you be ironic. [IMAGE HEAVY]

    NOTE: BECAUSE I AM AN IDIOT I ACCIDENTALLY DELETED THE ENTIRE THING WHILE UPDATING WITH THE NEWEST CHAPTER. PLEASE UPDATE YOUR BOOKMARKS. :C

    Words:
    9,926
    Chapters:
    11/?
    Comments:
    18
    Kudos:
    189
    Bookmarks:
    33
    Hits:
    10320
  18. Tags
    Summary

    This isn't a love confession. This is the most insincerely sincerely insincere thing Dave Strider has ever done.

    Words:
    1,200
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    12
    Kudos:
    72
    Bookmarks:
    13
    Hits:
    1977
  19. Tags
    Summary

    "We spend out entire lives chasing after a single moment," Rose warned him once, "But that is no way to live."

    Words:
    882
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    72
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    1769
  20. Tags
    Summary

    Dave Strider is a complicated man kid and no one understands him except, uh, all these people I guess.

    Words:
    912
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    242
    Bookmarks:
    50
    Hits:
    5578

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