Belelaith



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  1. Public Bookmark 14

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    Summary

    In the Shire, hobbits say: “What lovely weather we're having.” They also stir their teacups for four and a half clockwise rotations, place their left elbow seven-eighths down the way of the arm rest, and sniffle pointedly, which roughly translates to: “This tea is over-steeped and bland, your furniture is both uncomfortable and horrifically tasteless, and you're a twit of a host.”
    And I think that's beautiful.

    (Hobbitish is a language of manners and etiquette; the dwarves don't even know that Hobbitish is a thing; and Bilbo is trying to keep a straight face while the Company unintentionally sexually propositions him and challenges him to pie-eating contests to the death.

    Actions speak louder than words.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,642
    Chapters:
    2/7
    Comments:
    30
    Kudos:
    76
    Bookmarks:
    15
    Hits:
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    27 Jan 2015

  2. Public Bookmark 52

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    Belladonna Took kept a secret from Bilbo until she lay on her deathbed...that Bilbo was not a full blooded Hobbit, but half Dwarf. She wouldn't tell Bilbo the Dwarf's name and Bilbo had thought he would never meet his father until one night thirteen Dwarves showed up unexpectedly on his doorstep. And when one Dwarf began to brag about the time he spent with a Hobbit lass named Belladonna, Bilbo unexpectedly found his father.

    Based on This prompt from the Hobbit Kink Meme.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    23,137
    Chapters:
    10/?
    Comments:
    68
    Kudos:
    303
    Bookmarks:
    52
    Hits:
    7619

    26 Jan 2015

  3. Public Bookmark 42

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    Bilba Baggins is in a pickle.

    It had seemed like such a good idea at the time. Now she wonders if she might not be going completely mad. She just kidnapped the King Under the Mountain. Now what's she supposed to do with him?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,905
    Chapters:
    8/8
    Comments:
    89
    Kudos:
    251
    Bookmarks:
    42
    Hits:
    4931

    25 Jan 2015

  4. Public Bookmark 56

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    Waking up in a time that has long gone by is as confusing as it is terrifying. The latter especially rings true when Gimli realizes that he is going to meet people he has mourned for decades... and that he might have come here alone. Also, what if - what if he cannot change all the wrongs that happened the last time?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,032
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    67
    Kudos:
    225
    Bookmarks:
    56
    Hits:
    2289

    24 Jan 2015

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    While suffering from his line's obsession with gold Thorin Oakenshield rashly makes an agreement with the Shire's Thain that results in him having to marry one of the hobbit's relatives.

    Needless to say he isn't pleased, but cunningly picks Bilbo Baggins to be his consort in revenge against the Thain. For his part Bilbo decides to accept the proposal, though Thorin will be quite surprised to find out why.

    Note: I have screwed around with ages, geography and timelines to suit me. You have been warned.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    74,593
    Chapters:
    24/?
    Comments:
    227
    Kudos:
    1434
    Bookmarks:
    340
    Hits:
    38592

    23 Jan 2015

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