1 - 19 of 97 Works in Bad Pick-Up Lines

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    Klaus has Elena once again, but this time, he does something different with her. Klaus regrets what he'd done, and maybe thinks he has feeling for Elena. Will she ever forgive Klaus for what he's done, or will she hate him with even more? Will forgiveness lead to more, or will hate make Klaus end with a stake in his heart?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,859
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Kudos:
    6
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    136
  2. Tags
    Summary

    "Hey," Patrick said appreciatively from behind where Jonny stood, stoic as always, by the side of the pool. "Did you sit in a pile of sugar? Because you have a sweet ass.”

    Or: How Patrick Kane spent his summer hitting on the hot lifeguard with the help of some inspired (read: awful) pickup lines.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,812
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    11
    Kudos:
    131
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    1309
  3. Tags
    Summary

    "sabriel + hella bad pickup lines uwu" -As requested Anonymously on my tumblr

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    918
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    19
    Hits:
    160
  4. Tags
    Summary

    The title says it all. A series of snk otp’s using various cheesy and lame pick up lines.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,901
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Kudos:
    18
    Hits:
    274
  5. Tags
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,354
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Kudos:
    1
    Hits:
    59
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Eames is just that guy who kicks his chair backs and uses dumb pickup lines on him. Just because it makes Arthur feel flushed doesn’t mean that he cares, right?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    400
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    14
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    252
  7. Tags
    Summary

    In which Aramis despairs, Athos concedes that maybe it's time to start dating again, and Porthos finds his disastrous attempts to do so highly amusing - then takes matters into his own hands.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,212
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    33
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    246
  8. Tags
    Summary

    Stiles stays with his cousin Felicity for the summer after he and Malia have a bad break up

    when Stiles sees then meets Roy? He thought it was Jackson..Which totally excuses the whole “what the hell you doing here douche bag?” greeting….

    Stiles goes looking for something to make him feel powerful, feel useful again, someone who isn't weak. It however finds him after he is put in a coma, he wakes up and meets new people and finds out he has new powers.

    But are these people to be trusted? Only time will tell.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,950
    Chapters:
    6/?
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    90
    Bookmarks:
    22
    Hits:
    2799
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Lucifer starts to hiss. “I’ll let you sssssssuck my sssssssserpent.”

     

    “I’d let you into my Garden of Eden any day,” Michael says.

     

    “A romp with me would bring you straight to the Promised Land,” Lucifer says.

     

    “I’ll make you come so hard you’ll think you’re the second Noah,” Michael offers.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    335
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    5
    Hits:
    237
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Everyone deserves a dance with you.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,315
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    22
    Kudos:
    59
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    1677
  11. Tags
    Summary

    "I'm not a betting man, but this is a sure thing."
    Sitting in a bar, Pete and Brendon decide to have a little bet - who can pick up someone using only song lyrics. Naturally, Brendon finds himself talking to Ryan.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,837
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    20
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    154
  12. Tags
    Summary

    ‘Hey stud... you wanna dance?’

    So maybe Stiles didn't have the slickest of pick-up lines but it was the last night he would probably ever see Derek Hale and if the end of a drunk graduation dance wasn't the time to attempt his awesome moves, when was? He had nothing to lose and surprisingly, Derek seemed to have some moves of his own that he was pretty willing to show Stiles.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    36,638
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    18
    Kudos:
    100
    Bookmarks:
    22
    Hits:
    1623
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Levi was sure his job as a Drivers Ed. teacher could not get much worse, so leave it to that teal-eyed brat to prove him wrong.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,865
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    72
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    413
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Adam lost his pants, so he's trying to get into Michael's.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    211
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    31
    Hits:
    494
  15. Tags
    Summary

    It started as harmless flirting. Well actually, it started out as a game to Kirk to get a rise out of Spock by using the worst pick-up lines ever. But if you say something enough times, does it become true? Warnings for language and gayness. And badness. And junk. Really, this is just to make me laugh. Originally inspired by Wanna B Ur Lovr by Weird Al.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,225
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    25
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    361
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Written for the prompt(s): You look ridiculous.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,966
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    7
    Hits:
    49
  17. Tags
    Summary

    The first time Stiles walked into their cabin to find Derek suspended in mid-air, fingers curled over the door frame and every sweat-sparkled muscle of his torso beautifully defined and lickable, he absolutely did not make a high-pitched noise, run to find Scott in the infirmary and hyperventilate under a gurney.

    That would be ridiculous.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,304
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    137
    Bookmarks:
    9
    Hits:
    1472
  18. Tags
    Summary

    [Bartender AU, Hurk/Kai] Inspired by and based on Joh Araki's Bartender manga and anime.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,649
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Hits:
    27
  19. Tags
    Summary

    To Levi, all dentists are sadistic bastards out to get fresh blood and inflict pain on others for their own entertainment. He's been putting off his dental checkup, until one day the pain becomes unbearable and he meets Dr. Erwin Smith, who is everything his imagination is not.

    Well, at least he's right about the eyebrows. They're monstrous.

    (in which Levi is a sweet-toothed baker and Erwin is a dorky dentist who fails at being smooth) #16 - Excuses

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,469
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    11
    Kudos:
    99
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    1519

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