1 - 20 of 224 Works in Bad Pick-Up Lines

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    Because of you, I laugh a little harder, cry a little less, and smile a lot more.

    But not all at once, because that would probably be disgusting.

    --
    OTP prompt: You’re that guy/chick who always makes puns in my lit. class and they’re so bad, please stop.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,432
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    52
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    254
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Hoseok has bad pickups, Yoongi has bad insides.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,853
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    78
    Bookmarks:
    8
    Hits:
    482
  3. Tags
    Summary

    The sequel to "Didn't I My Dear"

    You guys wanted more, so here they are.... even shittier pickup lines! What am I doing with my life? Apparently writing about Lexa attempting to use the shittiest pickup lines ever. References to "Princess Did What?" and "There Was Just Something About Those Trees" by Jayenator565.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,086
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    43
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    732
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Jasper attempts to seduce Peridot. Needless to say, it doesn't work as expected.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    300
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    16
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    165
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Dean's flirty when he's drunk and Castiel doesn't fully understand what pick up lines are.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,462
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    25
    Hits:
    523
  6. Tags
    Summary

    When Romano and Antonio fight over Bella, she discovers her not-so-platonic feelings for her best friend, Elizabeta. But did Romano and Antonio really like her? Or where they hiding something else?

    Based on a post from Tumblr and a prompt from a fan on my Facebook Page.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,321
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    2
    Hits:
    53
  7. Tags
    Summary

    Gabriel wants sex. He REALLY wants to.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    188
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    26
  8. Tags
    Summary

    a collection of random ficlets I wrote for tumblr prompts - this is going to get updated whenever I take them on there in the future.

    update 25/6/2015: added a bunch of theon/robb ficlets (for the line prompts 'what happened doesn't change anything' and 'don't fucking touch me', plus getting emotional while watching a movie together, making up after a row with sansa's blessing, male models au + male model and photographer au, plus for a meme including different kisses: good morning kiss, awkward kiss, you almost died + war's end kiss, returned from the dead kiss, jealous kiss, last kiss, goodbye kiss), plus various robb-centered canon and not canon ficlets (pre-canon robb & jon spending time together, canon au where robb and bran visit jon at the Wall, robb + sansa modern au fluff, robb + rickon modern au fluff), plus one jon/ygritte (seductive kiss), plus one tyrion/bronn (awkward kissing), one tyrion/bronn/shae ('don't trust me'), plus three jaime/brienne (shy kiss, 'you can trust me', 'shit, are you bleeding?), and an mcu tony/bruce ficlet (ear kissing).

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    53,103
    Chapters:
    66/66
    Comments:
    74
    Kudos:
    224
    Bookmarks:
    8
    Hits:
    4950
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Another collection of responses to prompts I receive on tumblr, because the first was getting out of control. Mostly Ward/Simmons in nature. More tags will be added as they become relevant.

    New on 6/23: Chapters 49 through 66

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    72,052
    Chapters:
    66/?
    Comments:
    64
    Kudos:
    163
    Bookmarks:
    15
    Hits:
    3282
  10. Tags
    Summary

    After one too many ales in Skyhold's tavern, Finn Lavellan decides to try and "seduce" Dorian with absolutely awful pick-up lines.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,335
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    63
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    604
  11. Tags
    Summary

    An expansion on a prompt that was given to me on tumblr
    here (http://xsounds-homox.tumblr.com/post/116796256407/im-a-lifeguard-and-you-are-an-patron-who-really)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,805
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    28
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    432
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Sixteen year old Eren Jaeger, a high school student in his Junior year, is having a hard time keeping his grades up. So, one day his dreadfully boring Geometry teacher assigns him a tutor.
    It just had to be Levi Rivaille. The guy he's been tripping over his feet for since 8th grade.

    Previously Named Bulletproof Love

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,692
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    59
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    1006
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Nobody's totally immune to Harry Styles' charms, even when he uses the oldest lines in the book.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,613
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    31
    Bookmarks:
    9
    Hits:
    561
  14. Tags
    Summary

    That day, they both decided they were never going to take Inigo’s advice, ever again.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,515
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    18
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    225
  15. Tags
    Summary

    "You can do better than that, surely?”

    “Is that a challenge?”

    “Maybe.”

    ---

    [or, how Hikaru and his significant other ruin Haruhi's studying hours]

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    607
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    12
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    127
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Steve Rogers didn't expect much, transferring to a boarding school in rural Virginia from his old home in New York. A bunch of prissy rich kids, maybe. Hard work, perhaps. But finding someone like Bucky? Hadn't even crossed his mind.

    Bucky's third year at Lehigh didn't promise to be anything special- more college and SAT prep, likely, than the previous two, but otherwise much the same. So he was taken entirely by surprise to find himself falling head-over-heels for the new kid.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    47,021
    Chapters:
    9/17
    Comments:
    21
    Kudos:
    99
    Bookmarks:
    23
    Hits:
    2099
  17. Tags
    Summary

    “It’s just…as soon as I’m done and you have to go home…I’m right back out there again, begging for spare change in the cold. I never should have followed you in here; it will just make it harder to go back.”

    “Who said anything about leaving you out there again?”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    34,398
    Chapters:
    12/12
    Comments:
    40
    Kudos:
    160
    Bookmarks:
    27
    Hits:
    3255
  18. Tags
    Summary

    Derek Hale, a werewolf and porn star, also known as Darren Hayden, is looking for a new partner after a minor misunderstanding. He's lucky enough to get a request from Stuart Novak, a popular twink with a thing for blowjobs, knotting and werewolves in general. A guy, Derek knows too well from a variety of videos and he maybe has been drooling over for a long time. But, how well does he know him really? And more importantly: Will they ever stop making suggestive and inappropriate jokes?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    61,393
    Chapters:
    22/24
    Comments:
    312
    Kudos:
    833
    Bookmarks:
    208
    Hits:
    26585
  19. Tags
    Summary

    "See, guys like that? Dime a dozen. No, what you need," he continues, leaning forward into Castiel's space, "is someone who'll pay attention to you. Someone with a bit more," he pauses, tongue darting out to moisten his lower lip, "experience. An appreciation for the finer things, you might say. Not some frat boy wannabe."

    Dean keeps leaning closer and Castiel knows, deep down, that he should head in the other direction; this guy is just trying to pick him up for a random hookup, Castiel knows that. But he's captivated, can barely even look away from Dean, so he just swallows and keeps listening.

     

    OR: In which Castiel is on a bad date and Dean manages to make it better.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,068
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    51
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    394
  20. Tags
    Summary

    Based on this prompt.

    Akaashi Keiji didn’t have it bad for Bokuto.

    He was doomed.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,319
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    41
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    372

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