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  1. Tags
    Summary

    So like, Taako is a normal dude, right? Just your normal, extraordinarily powerful, supremely handsome, magic-umbrella-wielding elf who works for a secret (maybe evil?) organization that is definitely either going to save the world or snap it in half.

    Totally normal. Which is why it’s really annoying that he can’t find anyone on this gods forsaken moonbase to spend a normal afternoon with. Sometimes a guy just wants to hang out and like… not talk about the end of the universe or this goddamn hell-quest that he has found himself on. Sometimes an average, normal dude just want someone to Netflix and Chill with. The fact that he’s not exactly sure what Netflix is doesn’t really change this at all.

    (Or: Taako's Guide To Fantasy Romance – how to booty call the Grim Reaper for fun and profit!)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,467
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    52
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    195
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Kravitz lays back, Taako takes control, it's all good my dudes.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,049
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    4
    Hits:
    33
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Critical miss: You challenge a man to a fiddling contest, insult your husband, and end up baking cookies until three A.M.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,232
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    21
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    68
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Kravitz takes a midnight stroll, Magnus rushes in.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,154
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    58
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    726
  5. Tags
    Summary

    "Well I guess this must come as some small relief, right? Like all this time you thought your transmutation, your reckless magic, had killed the town of Glamour Springs. In actuality it was...y’know, plain ol’ jealousy. But...still. All those people died."

    "The people of this town died all the same, and you fed them their deaths."

    In the aftermath of the goblet, Taako tries to deal.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,173
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    25
    Kudos:
    175
    Bookmarks:
    20
    Hits:
    1009
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Taako ruminates and Magnus snores.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    669
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    39
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    209
  7. Tags
    Summary

    Of all the places for him to realize it, it’s a god damn grocery store.

    (Taako makes dinner and is happy.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,520
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    19
    Kudos:
    116
    Bookmarks:
    14
    Hits:
    720
  8. Tags
    Summary

    How the hell do these dudes keep doing what they're doing?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,357
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    18
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    123
  9. Tags
    Summary

    His name........was Boyland. And if it meant stopping the world from being consumed by a powerful evil, he'd follow his dear friend to the end of the world. Or the moon, that worked too.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,685
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    10
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    63
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Taako is sick and tired of training, but for once he gets a pleasant surprise afterward that makes sit absolutely worth it (and it's all because of some silly discount book, who knew?)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,750
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    41
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    323
  11. Tags
    Summary

    Drabbles for miscellaneous other pieces of media that I like. (Apologies for the incoherent mess this collection will inevitably become.)

    Tags in the author's notes for each chapter.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,115
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Kudos:
    14
    Hits:
    76
  12. Tags
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    441
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    21
    Hits:
    76
  13. Tags
    Summary

    All Kravitz wanted to do was drink a smoothie and look at a cute guy. Preferably simultaneously.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,063
    Chapters:
    4/14
    Comments:
    104
    Kudos:
    494
    Bookmarks:
    61
    Hits:
    2894
  14. Tags
    Summary

    A small town mystery that's too big for one awkward, humble detective to solve on his own.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    36,615
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    71
    Kudos:
    171
    Bookmarks:
    20
    Hits:
    1630
  15. Tags
    Summary

    When you sleep, sometimes you dream. When you meditate, sometimes whispers of memories you can't let go are all you can see.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    712
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    25
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    166
  16. Tags
    Summary

    It’s not a huge affair. It’s hard to get caterers and wedding planners on the moon. But Carey and Killian like it that way- small and honest.

    This podfic was recorded as a treat for Vassalady in the Informal Twitter Podfic Exchange, winter 2016, with permission from the author.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Kudos:
    1
    Hits:
    58
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Magnus's (very abridged) journey from "sweet country gal", to grieving hero, to adventuring warrior, to proud uncle.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,676
    Chapters:
    2/3
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    50
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    269
  18. Tags
    Summary

    “If you have ever lost someone very important to you, then you already know how it feels; and if you haven’t, you cannot possibly imagine it.” - Lemony Snicket

    Magnus spins Chance.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    928
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    25
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    173
  19. Tags
    Summary

    When Kravitz enters the Beast's Castle, it's safe to say he expected to see something a bit more frightening then Taako.
    Not that he's complaining. He might have expected fearsome beasts, but a weird hairy roommate works too.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,252
    Chapters:
    9/10
    Comments:
    69
    Kudos:
    152
    Bookmarks:
    9
    Hits:
    1389
  20. Tags
    Summary

    Carey is crushing; and boy is she crushing HARD. But she doesn't have the guts to tell Killian how she feels. When Magnus gives her the rosewood ring, Carey finds herself in a corner questioning her next move.
    Taako forces himself in as a wingman, Noelle is a third wheel, Carey tries to follow romantic tips from Taako, and more.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,373
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    24
    Kudos:
    73
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    519

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