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  1. Tags
    Summary

    And so it was the day that Karkat Vantas was set to die.

    At exactly 11:45 this night Karkat Vantas will simply stop breathing.

    His death will be peaceful, and covered in baloney.

     

    And it will only be the beginning.

    Because this tiny, old, baloney-covered man has a very long journey to take.

    And a very special man to find.

    Character study of the life of Karkat Vantas. Deals with tragedy, love, grief and forgiveness as Karkat travels through the spirit world looking for John. To find John he has to cross over, and to do that he has to forgive the people that hurt him when he was alive.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    46,545
    Chapters:
    18/?
    Comments:
    269
    Kudos:
    98
    Bookmarks:
    13
    Hits:
    1222
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Dave tried to tell himself that it wasn't a big deal. He just needed a place to rest for the night and maybe like four or five stitches.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,523
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    46
    Hits:
    308
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Patrick Sloan, a problem sleuth of the "highest" caliber, and his associates "Ace" Dick Dunn and Peter Inesco attempt to hire the infamous gang of ne'er-do-wells known as The Midnight Crew to help them crack a case that has had him puzzled for some time now. --- This limited edition of the ongoing story's first act collects and refurbishes the previously separate Troubles of a Legitimate Businessman, Associates of a Legitimate Businessman, Secrets of a Legitimate Businessman, Investigation of a Legitimate Businessman, and Lifestyle of a Legitimate Businessman in one multichaptered work for ease of access and new insights. Come read this newer, more definitive edition of the fic that people are calling "hardboiled" and "sparsely updated"!

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,069
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Kudos:
    1
    Hits:
    30
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Skaia High is full of a strange assortment of characters; the douchebag who plays guitar (badly) to pick up chicks, the 17-year old who still carries around Pokémon cards, but everyone finds him attractive regardless, the girl who became a certified lifeguard at 14, the disguised albino, the girl who’s best friend blinded her in 7th grade, and a myriad of other odd friends. They are slowly finding their way, paving their paths as they grow up. This is a compilation of their stories.
    ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    After the death of her mother, Aradia enters high school without a sense of family. Her father does his best, but doesn't realize what goes on when he's gone. While Aradia copes with her loss, adjusts to school, and has her own personal drama within her friends, she begins to wonder how much one person can take before they snap like her stepsister did.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    26,980
    Chapters:
    12/15
    Comments:
    24
    Kudos:
    33
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    906
  5. Tags
    Summary

    A tale of raising Aradia Megido, a stabdads story.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    672
    Chapters:
    3/4
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    5
    Hits:
    52
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Prevented from interacting with humans by Kurloz, Dave drags his brother along and gets into an interesting family feud and fucks shit up and ends up getting his ass captured cause we all know what happens when a mermaid (or aka alien) is captured. Relationships are developed and break ups are inevitable. Gangs and family rivalry become tense. Roxy is totally looking at John's butt.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,469
    Chapters:
    15/?
    Comments:
    37
    Kudos:
    103
    Bookmarks:
    11
    Hits:
    2062
  7. Tags
    Summary

    A story. One that you felt the need to make sure didn't go unknown. The story Spades Slick told that night that he sat down with you.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    549
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Kudos:
    4
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    46
  8. Tags
    Summary

    Aradia finds Karkat watching romcoms when he should be sleeping. Her latent Sister Instincts are tingling.

    Set in the MC's base.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    540
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    3
    Hits:
    87
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Deuce tries to give Sollux dating advice. Some implied AraSol. Fic request.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,120
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    1
    Hits:
    29
  10. Tags
    Summary

    The Problem Sleuth gang is in for an adventure with their children with them!

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,740
    Chapters:
    1/3
    Kudos:
    4
    Hits:
    57
  11. Tags
    Summary

    In which Karkat moves to a Texas and absolutely hates it. Dave constantly harasses him and Gamzee continues to irritate him, but kinda in a good way. A little DaveKat, but it's mainly GamKar.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,194
    Chapters:
    9/?
    Comments:
    19
    Kudos:
    87
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    1090
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Karkat moves; that means a new school, a new schedule, and a new realm of bullies to educate. He's used to it though. When your dad is a mobster, you tend to relocate quite a bit. It also helps if you're trained decently in at least six different forms of self defense.
    Oh, and it doesn't hurt that the quiet guy offering his seat to Kar is pretty cute, too.
    Or that a lot of Karkat's old friends also happen to go to his new school and/or happen to live in the same area.
    Although, it is a little unnerving, to say the least, when his dad gets a job, as janitor no less, to "flirt" with the school nurse...
    Ugh. Fuck life.

     

    so i feel like i should probably go ahead and tell you that this will not update in any feasible form of regularity

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,346
    Chapters:
    7/?
    Comments:
    110
    Kudos:
    99
    Bookmarks:
    16
    Hits:
    846
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Karkat is a 16 year old troll who lives with his mobster dad. When it's time for them to move Karkat, Aradia, Tavros and Sollux make new friends and even find love.

    Warning: Smut in later chapters

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,687
    Chapters:
    6/?
    Kudos:
    17
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    453
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Bro has a problem...
    He's indebted the the mob, and ends up as a bad sitter. (No, I have no idea either.)
    Grandpa Harley is his one honest client.
    Jade's a eight year old kid, who's never even met a troll before.
    And Aradia's dad may or may not my be an instrumental member in the midnight crew.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,199
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    10
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    90
  15. Tags
    Summary

    i told my friend gold i would write every single one of these aus for boxdroog. ive made a mistake

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    835
    Chapters:
    1/13
    Kudos:
    4
    Hits:
    65
  16. Tags
    Summary

    All you want is the bail forms for your father finished so both of you can get out of this hell hole alive and hopefully without you slapping this policeman's face because if he says ‘sweet cheeks’ one more time you will have to pay extra on a new account of murder.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,137
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Kudos:
    6
    Hits:
    115
  17. Tags
    Summary

    So the day's almost here, the moment of truth, the final event, the big group party takedown of The Felt. The Midnight Crew's here. Team Sleuth is here. Patrick Sloan, Peter Inesco and "Ace" Dick Dunn sit down around the table with Jack Noir, Paolo Diamante, Clint Duccio and Hank Bachman to lay out their plans, say their peace, then head out their separate ways before the big heist. And prepare yourself, because we're introducing something you've never seen in A Legitimate Businessman before: CHAPTERS!!!!

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,555
    Chapters:
    11/11
    Comments:
    40
    Kudos:
    29
    Hits:
    815
  18. Tags
    Summary

    “I thought that you’d hate me because I didn’t talk to you after I moved. Fuck, I thought that you’d spread this shit like wildfire and I kinda like this place. I don’t want people to start teasing me because of something as prejudiced as gender.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,000
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    18
    Kudos:
    92
    Bookmarks:
    15
    Hits:
    1457
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Peccant Scofflaw has a nightmare that doubles as a memory, and is unsure if it was induced by the Horror Terrors, or his own trauma.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,029
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    9
    Hits:
    105
  20. Tags
    Summary

    ==> Your name is Aradia Megido

    Her fingers danced lightly over the case at her side. The instrument was ready to be taken out and played.
    But it wasn’t the time. Not at that moment.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    510
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    12
    Hits:
    156

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