1 - 20 of 85 Works in Snarky Jarvis

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    In which Steve is oblivious and straight, Tony is oblivious and not straight, Clint is in denial and Natasha is sick of this. Bruce and Wanda just want to help, really.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    77,953
    Chapters:
    15/?
    Comments:
    139
    Kudos:
    189
    Bookmarks:
    29
    Hits:
    6957
  2. Tags
    Summary

    “Always the same. Shit, what is it with you Alpha’s and your egos,” Tony’s mouth ran off with words he didn’t even think about saying.

    “Tony. Don’t start,” Steve tried to calm down. His mind kept telling him not to let an omega to talk to him in such a way. He wanted to press Tony down, make him submit when only minutes ago he wanted to wrap himself around Tony.

    “Look, I get it. He’s your best friend. But you have to stop being a self-pretentious idiot who thinks he could punch his way out a situation.”

    “Like blasting your way out of a situation is much better?”

    “Yes it is, because I fucking use my head. This is a fucking conspiracy. They probably waited to tell you about all this bullshit when they had you enraptured deep enough to their ‘cause.’ Why do you think I privatized my suit, what do you think SHIELD would do if they got their hands on it? Everything they do is for their own gain.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,327
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    69
    Kudos:
    559
    Bookmarks:
    131
    Hits:
    11602
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Skye gets to know the Avengers better when Coulson's team visits Stark Tower for a movie night. Seeing how the Avengers interact with eachother, Skye's kink-dar reacts, especially when she looks at Loki, but she gets more and better than she bargained for.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,678
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    23
    Bookmarks:
    8
    Hits:
    1045
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Skye gets to know the Avengers better when Coulson's team visits Stark Tower for a movie night. Seeing how the Avengers interact with eachother, Skye's kink-dar reacts, especially when she looks at Loki, but gets more and better than she bargained for.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    723
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Kudos:
    2
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    183
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Skye gets to know the Avengers better when Coulson's team visits Stark Tower for a movie night. Seeing how the Avengers interact with eachother, Skye's kink-dar reacts, especially when she looks at Loki, but gets more and better than she bargained for.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    723
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Hits:
    102
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Tony gets a phone call that may change his life.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    85,816
    Chapters:
    23/?
    Comments:
    22
    Kudos:
    37
    Bookmarks:
    13
    Hits:
    2460
  7. Tags
    Summary

    Bucky thought the Avengers tower was strange. He wasn’t sure how much of it was living with a team of superheroes, how much was the fact that he’d spent the last seventy years in the hands of an organization that was brainwashing and wiping him, and how much was something else entirely. The Dom knew he didn’t exactly have a full understanding of how this new world he’d been thrust into, or any world really, worked but something just seemed…off. It nagged at him, pulled at his attention like a splinter in his finger that was too small to find.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    25,858
    Chapters:
    5/6
    Comments:
    283
    Kudos:
    525
    Bookmarks:
    130
    Hits:
    6023
  8. Tags
    Summary

    She smiled when she got her search done and she took out her notebook again smiling softly

    "I never been to Manhattan" she smiled softly and turned off the lights settling down next to Harry

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,459
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    20
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    1187
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Charles and Erik are settling in nicely.
    Well, mostly just Charles.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    583
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    24
    Hits:
    383
  10. Tags
    Summary

    After failing in his conquest of Midgard Loki decides that, if he can't take Midgard by force... then why not 'take' someone who already rules it? It is his birth-right to be burdened with glorious purpose... and who is more appropriate to help carry that burden than the genius who'd bested him?

    What unfolds from this decision, guided by the hands of fate, will have consequences which ripple throughout the tentative peace of the nine-realms and shatter the life of one playboy, billionaire, philanthropist...

    But, just as he did with a box of scraps hidden within a cave, can Tony Stark take these shattered pieces of the world he knew in order to build something better?

    Or will the chaos of this new beginning lead to the scattering of seeds he wishes to sew?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    89,299
    Chapters:
    63/?
    Comments:
    594
    Kudos:
    625
    Bookmarks:
    94
    Hits:
    21492
  11. Tags
    Summary

    What if Captain America never blew up HYDRA Base B28 in his Bucky-missing rage?
    What if all the agents of the Winter's Children Programme escaped?
    And most of all:

    What if they wanted to enter a television competition series?
     

    (Captain America never finds HYDRA Base B28. Sara and Beth sneak every agent out of the base and make it out alive. But after HYDRA’s collapse, they want to celebrate. So naturally, number one on their list is to try out for America’s Got Talent.)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,824
    Chapters:
    18/18
    Comments:
    64
    Kudos:
    66
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    504
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Loki and Midgardian fun ideas don't go well together. Because when Loki takes up a challenge, he definitely goes overboard. The world stands still, forever and ever, true love and shit kind of overboard.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,222
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    28
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    293
  13. Tags
    Summary

    When Tony, Sam and Bucky decide to become each other's wingmen, the Avengers Tower drowns in utter chaos and confusion. Jarvis is just tired of the little shits living under his protection.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,360
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    15
    Kudos:
    58
    Bookmarks:
    8
    Hits:
    669
  14. Tags
    Summary

    On any given day, JARVIS is aware that he has to not only make sure to keep track of what Sir actually finds of import enough to deal with, but make sure he's actually in a fit state to do so.

    Some days this takes more effort than others.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,722
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    56
    Bookmarks:
    5
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Thor is ignorant to the Dynamics of his counterparts and asks a simple question. The complicated answer derails the team into chaos. Will they be able to pull themselves together and bring hope back?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,922
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    11
    Kudos:
    112
    Bookmarks:
    24
    Hits:
    3760
  16. Tags
    Summary

    When Tony finds a new friend, he just can't expect them to be normal, can he?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,571
    Chapters:
    7/?
    Comments:
    18
    Kudos:
    14
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    508
  17. Tags
    Summary

    It wasn’t that Bucky couldn’t appreciate a good prank - he’d been on both the giving and receiving end of enough through his lifetime to have fun with them - it was just that this particular one seemed a bit stilted towards him, despite the fact that it had started as a prank war between Natasha and Steve, of all people.

    Now, prank wars in the tower were nothing new, with scarcely a week going by without one team member trying to prank another. Sam often compared it to living in a frat house, saying he hadn’t had to check his shoes this much since college.

    What was new, though, was JARVIS’s participation in them. Especially as Tony swore he hadn’t told him to do so.

    Bucky believed him, too, if for no other reason than his theme songs being almost as embarrassing as Bucky’s.

    ~
    In which JARVIS decides to play matchmaker, and Bucky and Tony find their song.

    From this prompt:
    Practical jokes abound. Latest is Jarvis plays theme songs every time one enters the room. James really would like AC/DC's TNT to be his hoping to get Tony to notice him. Instead it's all sappy sweet love or sexy songs. Jarvis playing matchmaker.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,572
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    12
    Kudos:
    270
    Bookmarks:
    32
    Hits:
    3098
  18. Tags
    Summary

    Prompt: Imagine if somehow if Tony 'caught' or somehow got Bruce's powers for a week and he kept hulking out. Bucky tries to keep Tony calm, but its hard.

    “It’s just,” and Bucky paused, looking over his shoulder for the sixth or seventh time that evening, “I had no idea he was so angry all of the time.”

    “Sorry.” Bruce sighed, rubbed the bridge of his nose. “It should only be a couple more days.”

    Steve gave him a shoulder squeeze, and Bucky passed the gesture down the line to Bruce. “It’s not your fault, Bruce. I know for a fact that Tony doesn’t blame you.”

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,171
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    58
    Kudos:
    666
    Bookmarks:
    45
    Hits:
    6739
  19. Tags
    Summary

    During a spontaneous experiment to see if marijuana will help calm Bruce's chronic anxiety any, Tony wrestles with internalized homophobia and his longstanding discomfort with his own secret wants and desires.

    (From a prompt my wife found on Tumblr: "when they lean forward a fraction as if to kiss the other person, then realize they shouldn’t and pull back to stop themselves")

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,295
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    51
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    1041
  20. Tags
    Summary

    The infamous Hacker of TARGET – that makes speakers ring porn clips through the speakers of the store – attacks again. The innocent ears of children aren't safe, neither are the Avengers, apparently.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,578
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    90
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    1118

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