1 - 20 of 24 Works in John Egbert & Jade Harley
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John has a sweet ass.
Dave wants a piece.50 shades of grey parody.
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“Karkat Vantas, Jade Harley and Becquerel. Because of your recent… protests against the Baron, you are hereby banished to the Wasteland. You shall walk it’s crust until you can walk no more, and let your corpses shrivel away and die. May the Gods have mercy on your souls…”
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A story in which a young mutant is given as tribute to the Grand Highblood and struggles to find his place in the world, ultimately coming to the conclusion that social reform is required. Involves over six separate duels (including two for quadrants), many scenes of violence, episode of traumatic flashbacks, multiple scenarios involving mind control, sexual encounters (both consensual and not), the destruction of no less than five fine seagoing vessels, blatant hemocaste desecration, even more blatant hemodiscrimination, two cases of mild quadrant vacillitation, one instance of quadrant fuckupery, and an inordinate amount of swearing. May not be appropriate for grubs and young trolls.
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What do you expect would happen when four demi-gods finally met up in person for the first time, after a lifetime of separation?
- Words:
- 2,277
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 1
- Hits:
- 766
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Imagine watching them all die. One after another, like chess pawns tumbling off of the board and shattering into a million tiny pieces.
- Words:
- 748
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 10
- Hits:
- 143
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"Jade, have you ever felt like there's something very wrong with the world we live in?"
"Oh John. I've been feeling that ever day for my entire life."
Being a Crocker is hard, and sometimes it hurts. A lot.
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Just a drabble I did a little while ago! Hope you guys like it (:
- Words:
- 853
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 5
- Hits:
- 129
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It's hilarious, actually; after all the stupid, dangerous stunts he’s pulled and the bullshit heroic battles he’s lived through, Dave Strider’s defining moment is in the passengers seat of your shitty station wagon.
Series
- Part 1 of The Kids Aren't Alright
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Brofriendship (n) \ˈbrō ˈfren(d)-ˌship\
1: the state of being total friends with years of history and affectionate loyalty
2: the quality or state of being friendly without any overtly awkward tones due to stupidly repressed feelings : brofriendlinessExamples of brofriendship:
If he laughs about your "brofriendship" one more time, you're going to break his face. -
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Ignorance like acid, burns away deep and seeps to the core, and it hurts and it stings yet you call for more, because at least then you can't have the knowledge of exactly how much is lost.
- Words:
- 1,681
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 6
- Hits:
- 84
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Some things happen so quickly that words fail to describe them. It's only in the aftermath, when the blood has slowed and the mind catches up on what the body already knows, that one can even begin to contemplate the implications.
Or a young boy can refuse to acknowledge anything and battle stress-induced insomnia instead.
That's fine, too.
Series
- Part 2 of Words Escape You
- Words:
- 3,005
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Kudos:
- 5
- Hits:
- 116
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“You ever think about running away?"
You snort. “That’s gotta be the most cliché question ever, dude. You know how many angsty teen books and movies have that exact question? All the ones that aren’t worth it, that’s how many.”
He looks at you, used to your constant rambling, and you can see that somewhere in his deep blue eyes, is a glint of seriousness. He’s asking you to run away with him. And he means it.Two years, nine hundred pictures later, what was lost turns up completely different.
“Stay here tonight.”
The please is unspoken, but still audible
“Wouldn’t dream of going elsewhere.” -
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John wants things he can't have.
Series
- Part 2 of Imagine
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"John, could you please quiet down a little? I'd just like to check the news and-" Jane slowed down and stopped in mid-sentence.
John was still lying on the floor. He could see his older sister go pale out of the corner of his eye, his ears perked up but the TV was not loud enough to make out what it was about. Something about a lot of car crashes? Did he hear the word 'Infection'? He made out words like 'mass panic' and 'trolls attacking'. It was like a whirl of voices that left him feeling a little agitated. He rubbed his head one last time before he sat up and turned to face the TV and the first pictures of what would change his whole life burned into his retina.
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Wherein the beta kids have an agreement to form a sedoretu once they're old enough, as told in a series of standalone pesterlogs. Part 1 - Dave, Rose, Jade, and John meet in a chat room on Jade's thirteenth birthday to talk about nothing in particular. Part 2 - The kids attempt to explain moiety to the trolls mid-game, which goes about as smoothly as you'd expect.
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dave drifts.
calliope dies.
dirk drowns.
jade floats.
kanaya watches.five drabbles.
[calliope's mentions blood. kanaya's is rated m for sexual content. words: 0 because they're image files, since i didn't want to reformat the stylistic spaces in between. otherwise words: 364, more or less.]
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Your name is JOHN EGBERT and you have been stood up by your BEST BRO and BOYFRIEND: DAVE STRIDER... Or have you? Warning: Contains mention of rape! Rated T for language and eventual whatnots. Humanstuck AU
Series
- Part 1 of Broken Verse
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Jade is sick of being so far from Rose. John is the best brother ever, and he fixes it.
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A bunch of drabbles/one-shots based on various canon situations and associated with playing cards. 99.99% character interaction, .009% speculation and silliness, .001% plot.
- Words:
- 2,061
- Chapters:
- 2/?
- Kudos:
- 4
- Hits:
- 250
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Summary
A collection of short drabbles (not even that, really) typed while listening to coloUrs and mayhem: Universe B.