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  1. Tags
    Summary

    Also known as the (mis)Adventures of Snooky the Fairy Dragon (the first in a trilogy!) Crackfic but the kind with effort put into it, not a sloppy oneshot that reads like the author was high

    What happens when a dragons pokes a snail? One would assume, nothing. But in this marvelous work of fiction, lots happens. And not all of it makes sense. Join our protagonists (a bunch of talking animals and fictional characters) on an adventure beyond imagination. Really, you want to read this. Very badly. There's something for everyone: original characters and borrowed ones, cats as well as dogs, gay relationships as well as straight ones, battles in space and battles in the courtroom, country music as well as pop and dubstep, and of course your charming and wonderful authors. This work by AandMProductions' Scatteredplot Press is the first in a set of three (in the works since 2012), and has its own glossary, character chart, map, and playlist. Stay tuned for these add ons, and enjoy the show!

    As seen on scatteredplotpress.wordpress.com

    Oh, and fyi, we swear kind of a lot in this.So if that bothers you, send us a message or comment and we'll see about putting out a censored version if there's interest

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,149
    Chapters:
    1/16
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    1
    Hits:
    99
  2. Tags
    Summary

    AU to both book and movie canon: In the aftermath of the Battle of Five Armies, Thorin is King Under the Mountain, and Bilbo's sacrifice has achieved little. The dwarves of Erebor are wealthy beyond their wildest dreams, but they can't eat gold, and they desperately need food and medicine.

    Proud Thranduil, still stung by the escape of Thorin's company and angered out of reason by Thorin's continued refusal to bargain, will not give aid for nothing. If Thorin will not give gems, Thranduil demands a harsh forfeit: that a young dwarf of Durin's line must be given to him as chattel in lieu of the escaped prisoners. The dwarf is to serve Thranduil's household for 77 years in exchange for what the dwarves require to survive.

    Gimli son of Glóin volunteers himself for this duty. He is given to Legolas Thranduilion, an arrangement that pleases no one.

    As Legolas and Gimli struggle with one another, Sauron rises in the east. He is all too ready take advantage of the prejudices that fester between the free peoples of Middle Earth, and seeks to find and reclaim the One Ring so he may put an end to a the newest unlikely threat to his power: the youthful heir of Elendil.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    136,350
    Chapters:
    64/?
    Comments:
    1225
    Kudos:
    859
    Bookmarks:
    207
    Hits:
    15398
  3. Tags
    Summary

    12 Angry Men are called in for jury-duty. They just happen to be somewhat special men.... Very special, in fact.
    In other words, not enough crossovers that put multiple geniuses in one room so here you go! :D
    This is less plot-driven and more of a crack-feast, so it can be read despite not being finished. I am working on reaching the end but my muses seem to have gone on vacation along with the ones that used to help McGee.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,563
    Chapters:
    9/?
    Comments:
    19
    Kudos:
    35
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    1784
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Bilba has grown up the unwanted granddaughter of the Thain of the Kingdom of Shire but, as she rarely visits the palace, the relationship holds little meaning to her. Instead she focuses on her second year of college, her ballet career and her slowly burgeoning romance with Bofur, a crew member with her ballet company.

    The same day Bilba is set to preform on stage for the first time with her company, the kingdom of Shire is anticipating another event. That very evening will oversee the political, arranged marriage between Thorin Durin, Crown Prince of Erebor, and an unnamed Princess of Shire (so unnamed because Bilba's grandfather is a paranoid bastard).

    Bilba doesn't care about any of this, she hasn't been invited and has no interest in other countries, politics or other such machinations.

    Just before she's set to preform, however, Bilba suddenly finds herself dragged from the theater and taken to appear before her grandfather at the palace.

    There she is informed she WILL be participating in the wedding after all.

    As the bride.

    Whether she likes it or not.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    67,427
    Chapters:
    13/?
    Comments:
    596
    Kudos:
    1078
    Bookmarks:
    288
    Hits:
    18511
  5. Tags
    Summary

    At the top of the world, everything was wrought in shades of white. There was the open silver sky above his head, and the shimmering, biting ice beneath his feet, and his death, stalking towards him, pale and terrible and utterly inescapable. In the last moments of his life, fate had seen fit to rob him of colour.

    AKA The AU where Bilbo is the one to die in the Battle of the Five Armies.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,944
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    47
    Bookmarks:
    9
    Hits:
    426
  6. Tags
    Summary

    I love drabbles. They fill up the corners and allow me to play with fanfic in a spare half hour. So whenever I have a few I'll be posting them here. They'll cover all sorts of Tolkien characters in all kinds of situations. Dip in during you coffee break. Enjoy.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,907
    Chapters:
    21/?
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    11
    Hits:
    416
  7. Tags
    Summary

    Erebor has fallen and with it the Line of Durin.

    The world has become a strange and dangerous place for the Elves, making them run and hide from the outside world. In the midst of such chaos, Thranduil, Prince of the Woodland Realm, has decided to beging a rebellion only to find himself at the hands of ghosts of the past and find out his very existance, as well as that of all he held dear to him are hanging by a thread and his only salvation it is the very same one that may be his downfall.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,129
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    33
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    166
  8. Tags
    Summary

    A Hobbit modern AU:

    Kíli’s life is a mess; failed relationships and a series of poor decisions have left him in an uncharacteristically miserable state. He's looking to start over, but he just can't help himself from falling in love...

    Fili is burnt out; his uncle Thorin is running him ragged at the family business - the one he'll inherit one day. Fili fears he's on the path to becoming a workaholic office tyrant just like his uncle...

    Until a natural disaster comes rolling through and screws things up even further: now they must deal with floods, breakdowns, a group of bumbling employees trapped in the office, and pending explosions (maybe?).

    Can Kili finally prove himself to his family (and the girl of his dreams)? Is Fili ready to be a leader? What’s really up with Thorin and that guy from Shiretown?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,471
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    11
    Hits:
    118
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Part One: Rae is unexpectedly pulled into the Skyrim civil war, captured as a Stormcloak Rebel. Head to the block about to be executed her life is saved in the most unexpected way.
    Part Two: when Rae comes across a necklace that reminds her of her mother, she can't help but touch it and finds that she has been transported to Middle-Earth where she ends up as part of the legendary Fellowship of the ring.
    Part Three: After the defeat off Sauron and the destruction of the ring, Rae is given free wander of Middle-Earth, she travels alone, eventually coming to stop in a cave with strange red rocks in the walls, red lyrium, intrigued Rae touches one, and suddenly she is falling beside a tiny elf with a glowing hand.
    Part Four: Corypheus is dead and the hole in the sky is sealed, Rae has found her peace but Skyrim isn't finished with Rae, she's torn from Thedas, from her new home and her love and planted back in the middle of her quest to kill Alduin. Her Commander love, Cullen finds himself at her side as she tries to save her own world.
    Part Five: It seems the Dragonborn and her Commander are needed in Thedas once more two years after the defeat of Corypheus.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    41,498
    Chapters:
    36/?
    Comments:
    11
    Kudos:
    16
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    522
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Thranduil founds a strange creature in front of his realm gates. Will he break the traditions of his people to pursue his thirst for knowing the misteries behind his visitor?. The future of Naí opens in front of his eyes, her past eludes all questions. In a world of shadow and distrust, after the fall of Smaug, will you be ready for this adventure?

    A story of romance, second part of a yet not published series.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,128
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Kudos:
    2
    Hits:
    40
  11. Tags
    Summary

    Sequel to Reader’s Retribution.

    The Fellowship is broken. The Watch is separated. A new reader has taken over, and can only lead to more chaos for our characters, trying to complete the quest and destroy the One Ring, before it's too late. New faces abound. The adventure continues.

    Takes place during the events in The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    44,046
    Chapters:
    35/35
    Hits:
    77
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Bilbo Baggins, an author, is swept up on a magical adventure with a biker gang at the urging of his extremely strange friend Gandalf, where he finds a magical phone that does some weird-ass shit. Also he falls in love.

    Years later, the phone falls to his nephew Frodo, who decides to figure out just who the fuck it belongs to. Turns out, the owner is a man named Mairon Aulendil who lives on the other side of the country and is also being hunted by his ex-boyfriend, a Mafia boss.

    Inspired by the tragic story of love and loss unveiled by selfies and texts he finds on the phone, Frodo forms his own biker gang and embarks on a journey to restore a valued possession to its rightful owner.

    Oh, and lots of people try to kill them on the way.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,411
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    29
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    280
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Forbidden love, a forbidden quest, and a forbidden ending. Thorin knows what he's getting into by falling for the burglar. For Bilbo, it's different. A soft flame, ignited when he first saw the dwarf. And nothing would ever be the same.

    (A predominantely Bagginshield fanfiction with Kili/Tauriel shipping and slight Fili/Sigrid implications. Hope you enjoy!)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,786
    Chapters:
    6/32
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    19
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    664
  14. Tags
    Summary

    While on an evening walk through Hogwarts, Dobby happens upon the arrest of Smeagol, who Snape and McGonagall assume to be a rogue house elf. So begins Dobby's quest to free Smeagol once and for all.

    // i wrote this while i had a concussion please don't @ me

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,084
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    5
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    35
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Summary: Bilbo Baggins returns to Erebor when he learns that Thorin is still alive, only he brings with him two children of mixed blood. Who are they and how will they fit into the fellowship of the ring? Author's Note: This was written by MollyMonster on fanfiction.net. I just help co-develop and edit it, but I have a account here so I am posting it here for her. Thanks sis! Couldn't have done it without you! Oh, and this is also on fanfiction.net too, under the same name but the author is MollyMonster!

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    138,179
    Chapters:
    31/?
    Comments:
    107
    Kudos:
    402
    Bookmarks:
    107
    Hits:
    13161
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Porn Industry AU. Azog and Bilbo are porn stars and the film they are starring in might not look out of place as a non-con/dub-con fic. But their on-screen personas are nothing like their off-screen personalities. Bilbo is the sassiest star there and doesn't take shit from anyone and Azog is working his way through a university degree.

    Featuring: Everyone and the Kitchen Sink. (I lied--the sink only makes a cameo.)

    Health and Safety: It is advised that food and drink should not be consumed during reading. Fanfic writers are not liable for damage to keyboards.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    25,562
    Chapters:
    7/?
    Comments:
    148
    Kudos:
    395
    Bookmarks:
    75
    Hits:
    7279
  17. One Hundred Stars in the Sky by

    Fandoms: The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types, The Lord of the Rings (Movies), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Storks (2016), Chronicles of Narnia - C. S. Lewis, Chronicles of Narnia - All Media Types, Chronicles of Narnia (Movies), Guardians of the Galaxy (Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien, DC Cinematic Universe, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Pirates of the Caribbean (Movies), Beauty and the Beast - All Media Types, Batman - All Media Types, Beauty and the Beast (2017), Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith, Supernatural, The Shannara Chronicles (TV), Kingdom Hearts, Star Wars: Rebels, Transformers (Bay Movies), Reign (TV), Wonder Woman (2017), Wonder Woman - All Media Types, The Tudors (TV), Game of Thrones (TV), Thor (Movies), Aladdin (1992), Peter Pan (2003), Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins, Hunger Games Series - All Media Types, The Hunger Games (Movies), Phantom of the Opera - Lloyd Webber, Le Fantôme de l'Opéra | Phantom of the Opera & Related Fandoms, Phantom of the Opera (2004), Shannara Series - Terry Brooks, Once Upon a Time (TV), Adventures in Typing with Timon and Pumbaa, The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett, The Secret Garden - All Media Types, The Secret Garden (1987), The Little Mermaid (1989), Star Wars Legends: Knights of the Old Republic, Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones, The Worst Witch (1986), The Black Cauldron (1985), Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars Original Trilogy, Rotkäppchen | Little Red Riding Hood (Fairy Tale), Epic (2013), Galavant (TV)  

    02 Sep 2017

    Tags
    Summary

    I have joined LadyLindariel's 100 drabble challenge. The prompts were created by LadyLindariel. Various worlds and characters make their appearances, ranging from events, parties, adventures, drama, humor, etc. But in the end, we will see, hear and return to Middle-earth.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    30,595
    Chapters:
    100/100
    Comments:
    13
    Kudos:
    8
    Hits:
    1516
  18. Tags
    Summary

    One person can make a difference: sometimes large, sometimes small. This is the story of a young witch who died under mysterious circumstances and woke up in a completely different world - a world she would change just by existing. Follow the journey of Hermione Granger as she walks the path to becoming Hermione Thranduiliel, the Elvenqueen.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    57,862
    Chapters:
    21/25
    Comments:
    311
    Kudos:
    1064
    Bookmarks:
    322
    Hits:
    15676
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Bilbo needs to make one more journey before he can settle into Erebor as Crowned Prince.
    One more journey he may not survive.
    Thorin will not be happy.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    24,626
    Chapters:
    19/?
    Comments:
    86
    Kudos:
    95
    Bookmarks:
    15
    Hits:
    2227
  20. Tags
    Summary

    Thorin is an Arnor police officer who is trying to take down the most corrupt man in the city- good ole Smaugikins (not that anyone calls him that to his face, mind, but the graffiti is getting pretty suggestive) when he is strongarmed (by a supposedly sick Dís) into attending his nephews' elementary school play. Though the play should surely be classified as torture, Thorin meets a delightful woman, Ms. Bella Baggins, the school librarian, and asks her out to dinner.
    In step a meddlesome (as always) Gandalf, precocious children, Smaug, and an existentialist fake mountain. Things go downhill from there.

    Or: Thorin and Bella are adorable, the kids find their inner thespians, Bella loses a cardigan, and thieving abounds.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    69,545
    Chapters:
    31/?
    Comments:
    400
    Kudos:
    438
    Bookmarks:
    89
    Hits:
    8763

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