1 - 20 of 272 Works in Charles Foster Offdensen

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    Collection of silly drabbles from requests on Tumblr.
    In the latest chapter: an AU where Magnus and Skwisgaar have a weird, somewhat manipulative relationship after Magnus is kicked out of the band, which Magnus (as always) reacts badly to.
    (a birthday gift drabble for a good friend, Xephyr!!!)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,737
    Chapters:
    9/?
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    55
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    449
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Police AU. Because of Toki's temper back at the Depths of Humanity, Pickles landed himself straight in the clink. Or until his court date, anyways. Between haggling his employer for bail and trying to earn the attention of the ethereal Skwisgaar Skwigelf, this round in jail's gonna be a helluva ride. Thanks a lot, Toki.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,696
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    9
    Hits:
    73
  3. Tags
    Summary

    As Dethklok try to get back into the swing of normal life, the Hammer rises, and a dark secret in the Church unfolds.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    64,695
    Chapters:
    28/28
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    28
    Hits:
    481
  4. Tags
    Summary

    A Boobklok fic. Caroline Offdensen and Muff Knubbler pillow talk about Catholicism, music, and of course, boobs.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,689
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    6
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    30
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Charles definitely isn't gay for Nathan Explosion; he just goes above and beyond the call of duty, that's all.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,034
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    17
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    198
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Nathan hasn't forgotten about that one time on the Dethsub, and Abigail kinda sorta wishes he would. Nathan's pining in the form of a non-linear acronym.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,169
    Chapters:
    6/?
    Comments:
    7
    Kudos:
    20
    Hits:
    219
  7. Tags
    Summary

    Murderface knows it's selfish, but he wants Toki back.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,503
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    11
    Hits:
    60
  8. Tags
    Summary

    A gratuitous psychological peek into the (theoretical) relationship between a singer and a drummer, with some panic and strife tossed in for funsies.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,939
    Chapters:
    6/?
    Kudos:
    36
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    424
  9. Tags
    Summary

    In which I have discovered some deeply hidden, very old, very secret things about a certain manager, and now share them with you.

    Written for the Hearts & Guts gift exchange

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,104
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    2
    Hits:
    33
  10. Tags
    Summary

    When Seth proves himself capable of handling the situation in Australia, Charles tentatively considers him an ally.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,821
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    5
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    78
  11. Tags
    Summary

    While assisting in the digitization of Dethklok's massive library, Facebones acquires the means to explain his origins.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,348
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    5
    Hits:
    89
  12. Tags
    Summary

    "Hey, guys, uh, where'd Skwisgaar go? He didn't even get to his solo." "I dunno, dood. Prob'ly off with some chick."

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,971
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    13
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    140
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Toki Wartooth has been having nightmares, leaving him on the edge of insanity. Between the panic attacks and the sleepless nights, Skwisgaar Skwigelf offers what help he can, but when he finds the circumstances spiraling out of control, will he be able to keep his own head screwed on?

    Set before and during the events leading up to The Church Of The Black Klok.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,832
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Kudos:
    6
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    88
  14. Tags
    Summary

    No real plot at all, more insanity.
    Knubbler can remove his robotic eyes, exposing warm squishy holes into his brain.
    Warnings: Skull fucking eye socket porn, and a reference to necrophilia. Also, possibly insulting to epileptics.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    712
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    5
    Hits:
    97
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Takes place after the season 2 finale
    Charlie fans and N/C fans.... Well just go ahead and hate me, I deserve it.
    Warnings: sex talk and robotics

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    820
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    2
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    25
  16. Tags
    Summary

    What if Toki is actually the true source of Dethklok’s success? What if Ofdensen was more the evil genius mastermind than just a manager? And what if Toki has been dead for 200 years?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,651
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    3
    Hits:
    57
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Police AU. For one of the first times in his life, Officer William Murderface woke up on time. He stopped his alarm clock right after the first beep, took a brief shower, and meticulously ironed his uniform. There was something undeniably different about that morning, something he couldn't quite place.

    The creamer in his coffee swirled and swam, just like how blood does in milk, he marveled affectionately.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,043
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    10
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    90
  18. Tags
    Summary

    Toki Wartooth, a stoner skater boy with a terrible home life, falls in love with the lead guitarist of a grunge band, the beautiful and foreign Skwisgaar Skwigelf. Oh, and the other guys do some stuff, too. AU.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    148,109
    Chapters:
    14/20
    Comments:
    25
    Kudos:
    63
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    1507
  19. Tags
    Summary

    You're managing, all of you, without your manager. You try this line on Pickles three days after the attack and he punches you in the mouth. He's not managing so well.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    0
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Hits:
    91
  20. Tags
    Summary

    AU/fan theory where Metalocalypse is literally just a TV show. Brendon Small sees an obscure band out of Tampa named Dethklok perform, and recruits the guys to portray their stage personas in his mockumentary about the biggest musical group in the world.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,020
    Chapters:
    7/?
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    18
    Hits:
    130

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