1 - 20 of 1000 Works in Bad Pick-Up Lines

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    Magnus made grabby hands at Alec. “Come, Alexander.” He beamed when he was gently tugged to sit on Alec’s lap instead. “Thank you, darling; you’re comfier than a Puffskein-soft settee.”

    Alec’s lips curved to form a pleased smile.

    “And I’d sit on you any time.”

    Ragnor closed his eyes as if he was in pain.

    __

    In which, Magnus and Alec are the power couple of Hogwarts who spend most of their time pawing each other and swapping bad pick-up lines while using their formidable prowess in magic for mundane things.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,623
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    20
    Kudos:
    231
    Bookmarks:
    37
    Hits:
    2872
  2. Tags
    Summary

    A collection of Femslash Steven Universe stories. Various pairings. Mix of SFW and NSFW.

     

    There is a pretense when Yellow Pearl suggests they stretch. Before her hands are on Blue, she knows what will happen. She welcomes it.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,729
    Chapters:
    20/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    43
    Kudos:
    264
    Bookmarks:
    13
    Hits:
    8099
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Jess makes the drink in record time and picks up a sharpie. In bold lines, she writes the cheesiest pick-up line she could think of,

    It seems I've lost my number. Mind if I borrow yours?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,105
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    2
    Hits:
    11
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Take a moment and imagine what would happen if you, just as you are right this second, woke up in a fictional world. It's impossible, it's crazy, and it's exactly what I did. This cannon-ish story is the result...

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    34,665
    Chapters:
    18/?
    Comments:
    83
    Kudos:
    84
    Bookmarks:
    16
    Hits:
    1439
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Jongdae is dragged by his best friend to some party where he doesn't want to be in the first place but ends up with a bottle in his hand and his face in the grass.

    And that is where he meets an angel.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,345
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    18
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    187
  6. Tags
    Summary

    A/N: Written for @sparklingcas’ V-Day Pick-Up Line Challenge. Shockingly this one just flowed! Got a little stuck but this was one the easier stories to write! Also get a toothbrush bc its fluffy! Hope you all enjoy it! Also a big thank you to @noisy–brain for all her amazing help!

    Prompt: ‘If I had a star for everytime you brightened my day, I’d have a galaxy in my hand.’

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,527
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    6
    Hits:
    64
  7. Tags
    Summary

    Prompt: Person A is a serious scientist while Person B is the happy-go-luck sports coach of Person A’s younger sibling. The sibling decides to matchmake the two.
    In this, Levi is a doctor because why not.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,425
    Chapters:
    7/?
    Comments:
    36
    Kudos:
    125
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    1418
  8. Tags
    Summary

    Sherlock and John attend a Halloween party and John gets jealous when Sherlock is hit on by another man. Sherlock has to convince John he loves him, and he does very well.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,822
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    6
    Hits:
    479
  9. Tags
    Summary

    An entire alternate multiverse of AC made of bad puns. And even worse puns.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,769
    Chapters:
    85/?
    Comments:
    57
    Kudos:
    108
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    1458
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Theo’s eyebrow arches, unimpressed. If he weren’t so fucking embarrassed—screw you, Mason—Liam’d punch the older boy in his stupid, perfect, face. That he also wants to kiss.

    God, his life is hard.

     

    OR

     

    The puppy pack helps Liam get some.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,894
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    122
    Kudos:
    184
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    2462
  11. Tags
    Summary

    Nine times Kylo embarassed General Hux. After few months since The Force connected Rey and Kylo, she couldn't stand to look at the tension. So she decided to get Hux and Kylo togheter. (English translation of my Polish fanfiction "Generale, ja...")

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,154
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    33
    Bookmarks:
    1
  12. Tags
    Summary

    The team goes to the mall again with Coran while Shiro and Allura stayed behind to guard the spaceship. Keith wasn't expecting to witness Lance failing to pick-up a girl and most definitely wasn't expecting himself to manage to pick-up a girl. A contact was given and Lance decides to have a little fun with Keith. From there, careless confessions were made.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    31,107
    Chapters:
    19/?
    Comments:
    94
    Kudos:
    296
    Bookmarks:
    26
    Hits:
    6061
  13. Tags
    Summary

    a.k.a your excuse for kissing each other is about as transparent as Jinghua's form is to regular people.

    Yang Jinghua thinks he's smooth. Duanmu Xi would disagree if he wasn't so into it.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,289
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    4
    Hits:
    63
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Richie likes Eddie but he thinks Eddie is taken so he tries to figure out if he is by leaving pictures with shitty pick up lines in Eddie's mailbox.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,059
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    13
    Kudos:
    142
    Bookmarks:
    13
    Hits:
    889
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Kenny and Cartman have a pick up lines texting war, the other boys join in and Kyle ends up giving everyone boners with his messages ;)

    Texting fic

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,612
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
    45
    Kudos:
    360
    Bookmarks:
    24
    Hits:
    4230
  16. Tags
    Summary

    This is what happens when seven guys create a group chat.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    180
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    25
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    304
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Pięć razy gdy Kylo zawstydził generała Huxa. Po paru miesiącach odkąd moc ich połączyła Rey nie mogąca znieść tego wszytskiego postanowiła wziąć sprawy Kylo w swoje ręce i pomóc mu w zdobyciu serca Huxa.

    Language:
    Polski
    Words:
    1,805
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    10
  18. Tags
    Summary

    After one final rejection from Patroka, Mikhail moves onto the other sibling to see if his luck is any better. But things are a little more complicated than he anticipated.
    (spoilers for up to chapter 6!)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,905
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    11
    Hits:
    115
  19. Tags
    Summary

    A less than typical fortnight in 1975, as experienced by various students of the same class.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,403
    Chapters:
    7/?
    Hits:
    269
  20. Tags
    Summary

    Sougo is drunk and he tries, maybe a bit too hard, to get this pretty girl’s number.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    477
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    17
    Hits:
    231

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