1 - 20 of 373 Works in Auto-Responder | Lil Hal

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    Dirk builds Hal a body and finds it more attractive than he thought.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    687
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    5
    Hits:
    81
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Having too much free time on his hands, Karkat decides to host a weekly movie night. And every week, he almost instantly regrets it.

    This week we're doing a minisode in the form of Batman the Dark Knight

    For a list of the previous movies, hoover mouse here

     

    Alternative title: Mystery Homestuck Theatre 3000

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    223,363
    Chapters:
    20/26
    Comments:
    608
    Kudos:
    315
    Bookmarks:
    62
    Hits:
    14212
  3. Tags
    Summary

    A solitary human in a very dangerous galaxy is looking for a weapon of the finest quality to turn against things that lurk in the deepest depths, in the void past the stars. Naturally, she approaches the newly crowned Empress of the Alternian Empire for some... raw material. Someone she can shape into a tool, a weapon. What arrives at her door will surprise them both.

    A classic space opera with new twists, writ large and chock full of thrilling action, cutting dialogue and romance of many hues and shades.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    60,000
    Chapters:
    13/13
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    18
    Kudos:
    19
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    148
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Androids have all but won the war against humanity, and the remnants of the once-great human civilization are reduced to miles of wastelands and hidden communities struggling to survive. Dirk and his friends are sent out to scavenge for supplies, while AR is sent to hunt down and exterminate the dwindling human population. Their fated meeting is the beginning of a union between species that was once thought impossible.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    106,551
    Chapters:
    23/24
    Comments:
    155
    Kudos:
    486
    Bookmarks:
    112
    Hits:
    8441
  5. Tags
    Summary

    "SO, DIRK........ I WANT TO PLAY A GAME."

     

    When the final battle against Lord English is lost, Caliborn offers Dirk a chance to prolong everyone's existence. A task so daunting he has to team up with the Leijons to do it.

    He has to ship everyone.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    63,960
    Chapters:
    7/?
    Comments:
    83
    Kudos:
    93
    Bookmarks:
    18
    Hits:
    2490
  6. Tags
    Summary

    You frown, hook them onto the collar of your shirt, and flop onto the nearest smuppet pile. You get the feeling it’s going to be a long time before you get used to living with your ecto-whatever the fuck, and an even longer time before you’ll be able to convince him to loan you something to contact someone with.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,759
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    17
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    141
  7. Tags
    Summary

    Davis Right is your average high school Sophomore.
    Hal Strider is a genius high school Junior.
    Davis has anorexia, and Hal knows. It isn't hard for him to figure out.
    So after some emotions and a poem, Hal starts helping Davis dig himself out of his hole.
    Davis thinks this is going to work out just fine.
    And who knows, he may even get a boyfriend out of the ordeal.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,220
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    11
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    77
  8. Tags
    Summary

    Hal gets a new feature he wants to show to his feathery friend, aka the orange feathery asshole. Hot sex ensues.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,202
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    13
    Hits:
    274
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Jake and his grandma live in a suburban home together. All is well and good with the two until Jake goes out to get food. When he returns he finds his grandmother at gunpoint and murdered right before his eyes. Jake finds the man and kills him, and is sent to prison where he meets Dirk, is shrink. They bond and Jake his sentenced to death.
    Dirk does some stupid things to help.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,092
    Chapters:
    1/4
    Kudos:
    6
    Hits:
    35
  10. Tags
    Summary

    “Okay,” AR says, and the subliminal buzz of processing picks up enough that Dirk can tell he's touched a nerve. A metaphorical nerve, anyway. “Look. One, that was the most tortured and unnecessary bro pun you've ever made. Two, I am acutely aware of how long you've been planning this stupid troll-humping shit because until I woke up as shades it was me planning it. The fuck, dude.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,886
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    32
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    253
  11. Tags
    Summary

    Dave Strider returns home from an exhausting day of work to find a bizarre package sent to him by his bro. It flips things a little bit turnways.

    This isn't strictly following the plot or set of character relationships from either Homestuck or Bee and Puppycat, but is more approximately a sort of bizarre mashup of elements from each reimagined into one universe starring characters from Homestuck. If you've read Homestuck but not seen Bee and Puppycat, you should be fine. The other way around, not so sure.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,477
    Chapters:
    1/2
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    6
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    57
  12. Tags
    Summary

    "It’s late at night, somewhere around 2am—your favorite time. Everyone is asleep but you and whichever human is maintaining lockdown tonight. You’re sort of crap at illusions, but you’re good enough to hide the fact that you’re up way past lights out, typing furiously on the cheap laptop your captors have allowed you. If anyone looks in, all they’ll see is your obediently sleeping form. You’re pretty sure it’s good enough to fool the cameras, too, including the smarmy AI who lives in them, but you’re working on that problem from a different angle.

    Because that’s the thing: any real escape plan has to involve disabling the so-called fucking Auto-Responder."

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,043
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    8
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    79
  13. Tags
    Summary

    After winning the game and receiving the reward of a new universe untouched by the tragedies the game caused in any way, the post-scratch kids are now living together in current day Houston, Texas. Through trials and tribulations, they have rekindled old relationships, claimed a dwelling of their own and have gone great lengths to make sure the future is theirs to do with as they will. Though outside forces are making sure this doesn't happen. On a triple date between the girls and Jake and Dirk to a local club, things get out of hand and arguments ensue. Unfortunately, no one would have guessed that the next morning Dirk would wake up naked and alone in a tub filled with ice. Nor that he would be zip tied and missing a few organs.

    Find out what happens when Dirk's mental strength is strained and Jake's love for him is tested...
    While a killer, sharpens his knife behind them both.

    Based on the series, "My Clarity" though not apart of the direct storyline.
    Some chapters are extremely violent. Please read at your own risk.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    36,098
    Chapters:
    16/16
    Comments:
    35
    Kudos:
    33
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    649
  14. Tags
    Summary

    A Homestuck AU (big shock) that takes place in the future (bigger shock)! Involves all the Kids and Beta Trolls. In short, they all work for a space company that discovers a new planet in which they will explore. The actual "story" starts several chapters in, but it's recommend to read each one to know the character's back-story and drive. I'm going update constantly (or try to, at least) every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. Please message any suggestions or complaints, and I really hope you enjoy it! (Umm, the copyright thing kinda confused me, so overall heads up: I'm not Andrew Hussie, so I own nothing of Homestuck, though I will claim the plot-structure in this story as my own. I think that works?)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    23,189
    Chapters:
    18/?
    Kudos:
    1
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    76
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Your name is LIL HAL STRIDER and you have no fucking clue how to deal with people outside of a chat client.

    Before The Game, you'd known a grand total of four Real People™, but none of them actually considered you a "person". The only ones who might have seen differently were all 'fake' like you, and they're gone. You're the only one left.

    The player count for this batshit excuse for a Game Session is nine humans, two dozen trolls, two cherubs, and whatever the fuck you are. There's a whole new universe waiting beyond that (if you live to see it).

    You're beginning to realize just how complicated being a Real Boy™ can be.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,573
    Chapters:
    10/?
    Comments:
    37
    Kudos:
    68
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    1555
  16. Tags
    Summary

    You are Dirk Strider, charged with fighting off the demons of Derse in a world where everyone is supernatural. Can you keep up the fight and somehow make the oblivious Jake English realize your affections for him? Yes. Yes you can.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    234,377
    Chapters:
    32/32
    Comments:
    503
    Kudos:
    819
    Bookmarks:
    174
    Hits:
    17614
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Hogwarts+Dirkhal, what could go wrong with some twins trying to one up to each other while simultaneously trying to make out with each other?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,820
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    10
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    193
  18. Tags
    Summary

    The night and day after. And then a bit more.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,837
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    14
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    58
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Relationships can be just a tumultuous as the ocean, Hal knows it well. But they're just as easily unhinged by their own force as they are built back up.

    And it only takes a moment to break something down and a lifetime to fix it.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,879
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Kudos:
    16
    Hits:
    130
  20. Tags
    Summary

    This is for a friend of mine-- ask-thisadventurer.tumblr.com -- who was upset when I saw a post talking about a need of fanfics so I asked what ships and the ones were given and I apologize for any ooc ness of Hal or anyone really.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    278
    Chapters:
    1/4
    Kudos:
    3
    Hits:
    127

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