19 Works in Auto-Responder | Lil Hal/Jake English

Listing Works

  1. Tags
    Summary

    Hal, Dirk, and Jake muddle through finding a dynamic that works for all of them

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,171
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    21
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    207
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Jake finds himself as a page boy for the King of Derse where he completely makes a fool of himself. His is trying to get back to his family but has grown a liking to the family. However, unexpected things are happening the people and world around him and he can't figure out how or why. He doesn't realize that he has become a root of so many problems until he gets mixed into the wrong business of everything.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,203
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    8
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    88
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Welcome to Skaia High's wonderful theater program!
    It may not be the most popular or well funded program at Skaia, but we work hard and create amazing plays and special effects.
    When it comes to joining the theater program, we highly encourage you to try your hand at the Skaia Actors Guild! There you will learn to improv lines and entire scenes as well as memorize and develop ones you've already read. It's a fun environment filled with humor and entertainment. Props are provided, and costumes are made suited for the actors or actresses in mind.
    If acting isn't quite your style, feel free to join the Stage Crew. There you will tamper with lights and sound. You can take pride in sending the whole project in motion!
    Join today!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,250
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    16
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    187
  4. Tags
    Summary

    In which Dirk and Hal's imaginations run away from them, and what could have been several potential stabbings are only just averted.

    (Note: No real robots were harmed in the making.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    0
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    13
    Hits:
    435
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Caliborn said: [...]or alternatively JakeHal with 36 or 3

    "I wish I could hate you."
    ---
    unknown jakehal kismesissitude leads into flushed crushes.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,697
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    18
    Hits:
    211
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Your name is Autoresponder and you are finally going to make your move.

    And you are damn sure it is going to go badly, but, fuck, you gotta take a chance some time. It was not like Jake was going to come to you on his own accord, why would he? You were just a computer program of a real dude who totally also has the hots for this jungle babe. There is one big difference between you and Dirk, though.

    You have nothing left to lose.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,775
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    110
    Bookmarks:
    9
    Hits:
    1679
  7. Tags
    Summary

    This is for a friend of mine-- ask-thisadventurer.tumblr.com -- who was upset when I saw a post talking about a need of fanfics so I asked what ships and the ones were given and I apologize for any ooc ness of Hal or anyone really.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    278
    Chapters:
    1/4
    Kudos:
    19
    Hits:
    392
  8. Tags
    Summary

    All my written fills for the fifth bonus round of the 2014 HSWC. Some of these go into potentially upsetting topics, but relevant warnings for each of the stories are listed in the notes at the beginning of each chapter.

    These prompts took the form of quotes, both real and fake, attributed to real people, fictional sources, or song lyrics.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,795
    Chapters:
    20/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    91
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    1166
  9. Tags
    Summary

    TT: He’s my boyfriend. I understand your emotionally detached software sequencers may have the slightest fuckin’ difficulty processing such concepts, but that’s usually who one goes to for sex.
    TT: If you’re a vanilla shmuck.
    TT: Are you a vanilla shmuck, Dirk? My personal analyzations have concluded otherwise.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,506
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    566
    Bookmarks:
    59
    Hits:
    6598
  10. Tags
    Summary

    In the vast land of skia, a secret war is brewing. A revolt against the tyrannous and slightly unstable heir of breath by powerful rulers. But as havoc breaks through, a forbidden relationship blooms in the most unexpected way. As the centennial eclipse of derse and prospit approaches, hidden prophecies are unearthed and blood is spilt by the trusted.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,207
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Kudos:
    15
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    280
  11. Tags
    Summary

    hollow /ˈhɒloʊ/ adj. without real or significant worth; meaningless

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,909
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Kudos:
    17
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    356
  12. Tags
    Summary

    "You have to disassociate during the act. You have to separate your mind from your body, from your rational process of thought, or else you will be smacked with the realization that the thing inside you is something else, something that's not supposed to be there. Something that is not cells, but circuitry."

    Jake reflects on the nature of his relationship with HAL.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    530
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    17
    Hits:
    389
  13. Tags
    Summary

    A collection of all the drabbles or short fics that I've written but that I don't feel are strong enough or long enough to stand on their own. Contains smut, fluff, drama, all kinds of things. Mostly Dave/John or Dirk/Jake.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,045
    Chapters:
    10/?
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    72
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    2430
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Your name is Dirk Strider and you just broke your best bro's heart.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    511
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    57
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    1922
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Jake is confused by AR's sexy new look. A look at the perils and pleasures of dating a computer program.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,568
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    13
    Kudos:
    66
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    1437
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Strider's Auto Responder hacks into Jake's skulltop for a bit of fun.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    963
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    159
    Bookmarks:
    18
    Hits:
    4169
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Your name is DS'S CHAT CLIENT AUTO-RESPONDER. For given values of existence that specifically include qualifying as 'sentient', you are five months, one week, three days, 14 hours, 51 minutes and 19 seconds old.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,787
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    25
    Kudos:
    135
    Bookmarks:
    19
    Hits:
    2331
  18. Tags
    Summary

    25 different kinky Homestuck drabbles, each focusing on one (or more) different pairing. Written for Kink Bingo's December minichallenge. Contains spoilers up to Act 6 Act 1.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,441
    Chapters:
    25/25
    Comments:
    26
    Kudos:
    982
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    29340
  19. Tags
    Summary

    "There are three governing principles at work within the core logical constraints of Strider's auto-responder. First, that DS is an inimitably rad bro of incomparable measure. Second, that all arguments may contain fallacies and it is necessary to know which response is best, not which response is right. And last, that Jake English is the dreamiest individual to ever fry a circuitboard."

    Unfortunately, it is a lonely prospect, being in love with mister English when the auto-responder can no more convey its feelings than it can convince Jake English of its arguable humanity.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    813
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    11
    Kudos:
    63
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    1153

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