Of Losing and Finding - Sijglind - Mass Effect [Archive of Our Own]

Main Content

While we've done our best to make the core functionality of this site accessible without javascript, it will work better with it enabled. Please consider turning it on!

Of Losing and Finding

Series Metadata

Series begun:: 2012-03-30
Series updated:: 2013-01-14
Works included:: 2
Complete:: No
Word count:: 24,871
Author:: Sijglind
Description:: Kaidan Alenko fell in love with his superior, Commander Shepard. He thinks that this has no future, and tries to hide his feelings until they're gone. But it is hart to forget someone like Commander Shepard - especially when they die and you have to bear the survivor's guilt.
This series is set in the Mass Effect Universe and follows the developments of the games from Kaidan Alenko's PoV. There will be at least 3 parts, the first one can be read as a stand-alone.
It is a romance - of course - between Kaidan and M!Shep, and there will be a lot of angst.
I own neither the characters, nor the setting.

Listing Series

It could have been so easy by Sijglind

Mass Effect
30 Mar 2012
Tags
Summary

NOW WITH ARTWORK

Kaidan Alenko is haunted by inappropriate dreams about Shepard. But the man is off-limits for him, and anyway Shepard would never feel the same way about his subordinate... Or would he?

I couldn't let my mind wander off like this, especially not with him sitting right there, on the other side of the table. So near... I could have reached out and touched his hands to feel what I only dreamed about...

Series
- Part 1 of Of Losing and Finding
Words:

6,429

Chapters:

1/1

Comments:

10

Kudos:

38

Bookmarks:

1

Hits:

1841
Flashes by Sijglind

Mass Effect
14 Jan 2013
Tags
Summary

“Take it easy. It's over, you're safe now."
Yes, I was. But what was it worth when Shepard wasn't. There was a hole in my chest, shaped like him, and I thought it could never be filled again. Something cold had wrapped itself around my heart like a snake of ice, ready to crush it. I hoped it would, so everything could end and there was no pain any longer. I was nothing more than a husk that had been lucky enough to survive.
Lucky? This had nothing to do with luck. This was torture.

Survivor's guilt is a bad thing, a twisted thing, a corrosive thing. Kaidan survived, Ashley died.
And now the one he loves is dead. And he isn't.
NOW WITH ARTWORK

Series
- Part 2 of Of Losing and Finding
Words:

18,442

Chapters:

5/?

Comments:

13

Kudos:

44

Bookmarks:

5

Hits:

1109