AND OMG, JASMINE!STILES....IS SCOTT RAJA???? THEN...WHO IS THE GENIE? IS THE GENIE DANNY??? AND LIKE JACKSON IS SMITTEN FOR THAT HOT GENIE? OR STILES ASKING DANNY, YOU'RE A GENIE, DO YOU FIND ME ATTRACTIVE? I AM NOT EVEN ATTRACTIVE TO GENIES. AND GENIES HAVE SEEN IT ALL. I WOULD HAVE PICTURED STILES BEING ALADDIN, WHAT WITH BEING THE DIAMOND IN THE ROUGH BUT IT CAN GO THE OTHER WAY. I JUST LAUGH AT DEREK BEING A SULLEN PRINCE. BUT THEN PETER GETS TO BE THE CREEPY VAZIR.
AND MULAN!STILES! YES, HE WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR HIS DAD. LIKE GO TO WAR.
LOL MY DJINN!DEREK IS ALREADY SERVING HIS TIME AS MODERN!ALADDIN!STILES'S SERVANT. I AM NOW REGRETTING THE OPPORTUNITY TO CHARACTERIZE STILES AS JASMINE. CERTAINLY HE'D LOOK PERFECT IN A BLUE TUBE-BRA AND LOW-SLUNG HAREM-PANTS.
PETER = CREEPY VIZIER. TRUTH.
MULAN!STILES WOULD ABSOLUTELY GO OFF TO WAR FOR HIS DAD. STERN!GENERAL!DEREK WOULD BE LIKE, "WHAT IS WITH THIS PATHETIC RECRUIT, OH WAIT LOOKIT DAT ASS."
WHERE WOULD THE GENDER-BENDING COME IN, THOUGH. BECAUSE I DESPERATELY WANT GENDER-BENDING.
MAYBE STILES ACTUALLY SIGNS UP AS A GIRL? OR SOMETHING? BECAUSE - BECAUSE! OF SOMETHING. I DON'T KNOW WHAT. OH YES, BECAUSE YOU KNOW HOW STILES'S MOM DIED? APPARENTLY SHE WAS A SOLDIER, TOO AND SHE WAS COMMANDING THE ALL-FEMALE SQUADRON, A KIND OF SPECIAL FORCE OR SOMETHING, EXCEPT THAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES OF HER DEATH WERE NEVER MADE CLEAR (THEY WEREN'T AT THE FRONT WHEN SHE DIED, SO IT COULDN'T HAVE BEEN AN ENEMY ATTACK), AND STILES HAS ALWAYS WANTED TO SOLVE THIS MYSTERY, ANYWAY, SO HE DECIDES TO KILL TWO BIRDS WITH ONE STONE. 1) SAVE HIS DAD. 2) FIND JUSTICE FOR HIS MOM.
GENERAL!DEREK STILL COMMANDS ALL THE RECRUITS AS A WHOLE, THOUGH. IT'S PLAIN OLD COMBAT TRAINING; DEREK MAKES NO CONCESSIONS FOR THE FEMALES.
MEANWHILE, STILES FINDS OUT THAT THE CREEPY NEW FEMALE COMMANDER IS ACTUALLY AN ARGENT AND ALSO INCIDENTALLY KILLED STILES'S MOTHER. TO BE PROMOTED IN HER STEAD.
MY GAWD, HAREM PANTS. AND I JUST PICTURE HIS DAD ROLLIN' HIS EYES AND TELLIN' HIM TO CHANGE AND DOING THIS WILL NOT GET HIM OUT OF MARRYING. LIKE STILES TRIES TO MAKE HIMSELF UNDESIRABLE TO NOT GET MARRIED. BECAUSE THEY ONLY WANT THE KINGDOM AND NOT HIS HEART. AND HE MEETS DEREK WHO MAKES HIS HEART BEAT FAST.
OH GAWD, STILES WOULD DO THAT TO SOLVE THAT MYSTERY. AND LYDIA FINDS OUT AND HELPS HIM BE A GIRL, A KICKASS LADY. LIKE, I FEEL INSULTED THAT YOU SUCK AT BEING A GIRL. I NEED TO HELP YOU. FOR THE SAKE OF MY GENDER. SHE'S HIS MUUSHUU
OR ALWAYS-A-GIRL STILES WHO FAILS AT BEING MATCHMADE AND LIKE IS HORRIFIED THAT HER DAD IS CALLED TO WAR, HE HAS HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE! HE CAN'T GO TO THE FRONT. THEY SERVE GREASY FOOD OUT THERE. >.> AND DEREK IS CURIOUSLY INTRIGUED BY STILES. AND LIKE SCOTT FINDS OUT AND GOES TO WAR WITH HER AND LIKE HELPS HER. AND JACKSON IS SO SUSPICIOUS ... HE ACTUALLY THINKS SCOTT IS A GIRL... HIJINKS.
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