"So," Kurt says, slipping one hand under Santa's jacket and tracing Santa's abs with his thumb. "You finally ready to come home with me? I swear, I've been extra naughty this year."
Santa sniggered through his beard, half-hidden eyes trained on Kurt's face, even as he reached out and flicked the bell on Kurt's prize-winning bad sweater. It jingled merrily, and Santa said, "Technically, I'm still on the clock until eleven."
Looking around at his coworkers, Kurt waved them off. "They're all drunk as skunks. No one's gonna mind if we leave early. Oh!"
Santa rose an eyebrow at Kurt, but it disappeared under his wig.
"I should check with my boyfriend!" Kurt replied, pulling his phone out of his pocket.
"Check with your…" Santa said, pulling away, which made Kurt pout. "Like, to make sure the place is empty? Look, man, I've done my fair share of cheating and I'm pretty over-"
"No," Kurt interrupted, making a placating gesture in Santa's direction. "Santa, no. I'm not that naughty. My boyfriend likes guests!" Leaning closer, Kurt murmured, "Especially guests with incredible abs!"
Santa's mouth fell open, though it was hard to tell how far with that beard in the way. Kurt pulled it down, the elastic stuck around Santa's ears. The face behind the beard was even more handsome than Kurt had anticipated based on Santa's eyes. "You alright there, Santa? You still coming home with me?"
Clearing his throat, Santa nodded. "Uh, yeah. Yeah, I'm coming home with you." Santa gently uncurled Kurt's fingers from his beard and settled it back into place. "Is your boyfriend as hot as you, naughty boy?"
Kurt took Santa's hand and pulled him toward the elevator. "Hotter." Kurt grinned and pulled Santa onto the elevator as it opened. Putting his own back against the elevator wall, Kurt pulled Santa's beard down again and pressed his lips to Santa's. He tasted like peppermint.
Santa crowded Kurt against the wall without much persuasion, pressing his hips against Kurt's. "Ooh, Santa!"
Santa laughed and stole another kiss.
On the way to Kurt's apartment, the taxi driver pretended not to see anything, behavior which Kurt rewarded with a hefty tip. When Kurt finally led the way into the apartment himself, he felt like he was about to explode with the frustration of still being dressed, despite Santa's best efforts otherwise.
Just as Kurt kicked the front door closed, Finn emerged from the bedroom, wearing black pajama bottoms and the collar Kurt had given him for St. Nick's day, complete with a single jingle bell at the throat. Finn's smile brightened his whole face. "Santa!"
Lazily, Santa asked, "What, are you supposed to be a reindeer?"
Finn shrugged. "I don't know. It's festive."
Santa rolled his eyes, but waved Finn closer. "Festive works. Your idea, Naughty Boy?"
Kurt grinned, catching Santa by one of his suspenders and Finn by his collar. "C'mon, gentleman. It's almost Christmas! If we're going to let Santa get to his sleigh on time, we've gotta get moving."
Finn laughed brightly and Kurt watched as Finn put one hand under Santa's coat. Two seconds later, he had them right where he wanted them – in the bedroom.
In the morning, Puck woke up and rolled out of bed, his head swimming as he lumbered toward the coffee maker. When he got to the kitchen, Kurt was already there, handing him a mug with a candy cane hooked on the edge. Chuckling, Kurt pointed out, "You're still wearing your Santa hat."
Puck smirked and took a sip of his coffee. "Rudolph's still out cold. How's Santa's sexiest elf this mornin'?"
Hefting himself up onto the counter and pulling Puck to stand between his legs, Kurt said, "Not bad at all. It's a shame we only play this game once a year."
"Never heard of Christmas in July, baby?"
Kurt laughed loudly and when he was done, his eyes focused over Puck's shoulder. Puck turned around and leaned back against Kurt's chest as he watched Finn stumble into the kitchen. "What do you think, Finn?" Kurt asked. "Christmas in July?"
Finn stopped, his eyes trained on the refrigerator door handle. After a moment, he said, "I call dibs on no Santa suit in the middle of summer."
"Not it!" Puck cried, craning to look at Kurt's face over his shoulder.
Kurt's grin took on that evil smirk that made shivers run up and down Puck's spine. "I'll see what I can do."